My FH and I are paying for the wedding ourselves, and it mostly coming from my savings because Im in grad school now. Im really torn between trying to have my dream wedding or an affordable one. Is it worth going through my whole savings for one day so that I pick the venue that I love or should I go with one that I only like but would be more comfortable financially?
I know this is a very personal decision. But I would really like to know if there are any other brides out there who had to make this decision and whether they had any regrets one way or the other.
Thanks so much!!
HSsweethearts
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Re: Need Advice: is it worth it?
We totally broke the bank and went with a hall that wasy WAY over budget. it really was our DREAM wedding and we really loved the food and service and it was everything we wanted. We found other ways to save money like using a DJ instead of a band and we used a less expensive DJ.
Now that the wedding is over, I can think of 100 other uses for the obscene amount of money we spent, but we really don't regret it.
it's a VERY personal decision though.
PSP
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We are paying everything ourselves, and going through the spread sheets of the vendors we still have to pay is freaky.
Especially when added costs come up! A few hundred here or there doesn't sound much when planning, but when you add it all together... OMG I've never spent so much money in my entire life!!!
Definitely make sure you have spare money for things that come up unexpectedly, but only you can decide on whether or not to go with your dream venue or not.
My venue is super expensive, but no regrets on that at all. I am having regrets though on spending SOOO much on music. Dont forget to check if your church allows electronic music or make you go with a particular singer or whatever! I just found out about this which is mind boggling, since we had asked the church for costs at the first meeting and they gave us the price, but didn't say we had to go with church musicians.
Uggh... So we paid for our outside people for doing nothing basically. Nice to find out shortly before the wedding. uggghhhh
can't complain much though since the church is allowing us to get married there and its not our parish. so we are completely greatful for that. Just not expecting the extra cost.
pixietina
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Re: Need Advice: is it worth it?
To me it was worth every penny even though I could have used that money elsewhere. It really is up to you.
cdh2672
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Like you said, it's a personal decision...but...I look back on it now and sometimes think we should've done something smaller (and I didn't even have that big of a wedding - 125 people. I don't dwell on those thoughts though, and look back on the memories and what a great, fun day we had! Honestly, it depends on your personalities and what you want as a couple. Good luck!
angelicd77
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My FH and I decided to go with the more affordable hall rather then the one that we really LOVED. We made that choice because we had to cut so much out of the package from the hall that we loved just to get it down to a number we could consider. I dont regret at all booking the more affordable hall because were getting twice the amout of food and extras then we were at the other hall and the only real difference is that the more affordable hall has carpet and its not as 'glitzy' as the other one. Like the other girls said, its a very personal choice and one that ultimately only you and your FH can make. My only suggestion would be to put the pros and cons of each on a sheet of paper and really figure out if the one you love is really worth all the extra money because in my case.. it wasnt.. HTH!!!
AnnaK26
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Re: Need Advice: is it worth it?
my FH and I also chose an affordable place rather than the expensive DREAM place. we are buying a house and we found it very hard to do both at the same time so we decided to put the money into the house rather than the venue.
bottom line is the venue means different things to different people so you have to decide what it means to you and make a decision that you are comfortable with. Good Luck!
Christina11913
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My venue is a pretty penny but I wouldn't change it for the world. I dont want to look back at my pictures and WISH I was had the wedding some place else. I just want everyone to have a good time drinking, eating and dancing. Do whhat your heart says, you can always save more money other places.
net267
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Posted by AnnaK26
my FH and I also chose an affordable place rather than the expensive DREAM place. we are buying a house and we found it very hard to do both at the same time so we decided to put the money into the house rather than the venue.
bottom line is the venue means different things to different people so you have to decide what it means to you and make a decision that you are comfortable with. Good Luck!
This exactly! Good luck!
crisy211
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For me personally, it was not worth it to blow our savings or go into debt over a wedding. Now I do think we are still paying a considerable amount (and we even raised our budget about 5K+ once we got to looking!) but I could not justify having my dream wedding over a down payment on a house! I still think we are having a beautiful wedding but we didn't go with a super pricey venue and have cut out many things that aren't important to us (limos, favors, video, custom invitations, floral centerpieces, even a bridal party). The way we saw it was as long as we weren't cutting back on things important to us (guest list, photography, night wedding); or what we think is important to our guests (good/plentiful food, open bar, bringing dates, convenient time/day) that we wouldn't mind getting rid of all of those little extras that add up and nobody would notice. Like you said though, it is a personal preference and everybody feels differently. Definitely do your research and see what you can get for your money. Once all of your options are in front of you, I think it's easier to make a decision and decide if it's worth it to you.
JuneBug86
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Re: Need Advice: is it worth it?
We're also paying everything ourselves and with the money we're spending on this wedding I can definitely find a million things to use it for (pay off student loan, down payment on a house,etc...)We're not even having a big wedding but with today's costs everything just adds up. Sometimes I also doubt our decision but my FH is always there to reassure me that this is something that will only happen once and we deserve to have something for ourselves for a day....So for me, going with what you want is worth it as long as you don't go overboard or go out of your way to make yourself broke. Remember it's the memories really that count and money it always comes and goes so might as well enjoy while you can.
scottsbride
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Re: Need Advice: is it worth it?
We are paying for everything ourselves and we have picked the hall we wanted and it is expensive however you only do this once and my FH is very much into giving me the wedding of my dreams. We are cutting back on some things like only having one limo instead of the special vehicle for us.
LMEL1223
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I was in a similar situation. DH and I discussed what we really wanted and ended up having a small wedding, on a Saturday day but at a place that we loved. I can honestly say we had our dream wedding on a budget.
If you are willing to make some compromises, time off year/ day/ # of guests, you can still get what you want on a budget.
mrs2012
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Posted by LMEL1223
I was in a similar situation. DH and I discussed what we really wanted and ended up having a small wedding, on a Saturday day but at a place that we loved. I can honestly say we had our dream wedding on a budget.
If you are willing to make some compromises, time off year/ day/ # of guests, you can still get what you want on a budget.
this - i think there are ways to budget yourself in order to accommodate your dream venue. choosing a different time of year; going with a friday or sunday - afternoons instead of evenings; or even going with a date during the week - like before a holiday (we have friends getting married on tuesday, july 3 of this year). i think the best way to cut costs is to cut your guestlist too.
orginally my fiance and i assumed we'd buy a house before finance a wedding; however, we decided to build up his credit while saving for our wedding 2+ years in advance. its been so great for us doing it this way - and i can say that we're going to be fine financially by the time our date rolls around - and im so thankful for that.
and also, dont be shy about asking a friend who you know who does photography or make up on the side. utilize the people around you who can help absorb some of the costs! best of luck to you - i hope you have the wedding of your dreams :)
thefloreswedding
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I think you need to be realistic and not go over budget.You dont want to break the bank and not be left with anything. You should set up a budget plan and see how much you can financially handle. Maybe cutting down costs in some areas can help you get a better RH that you really want. me and FH are paying for EVERYTHING ourselves. No one is helping us. But one way or another we are doing it, and we have learned to budget things....plus if you need more time to plan, set you date for maybe 2 yrs in advance? this way you have more time to make payments..... FM if you want to talk or need advice, ive definitely been in your shoes and can tell you from experience, just analyze your bank account vs. wedding budget so you can have a GREAT wedding and not be broke.
Lilnessa
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I'd try to find one that you love that is more in your budget. My DH and I paid for our wedding ourselves and the venue/food was most important. I love love loved my venue and it was everything i wanted and they were more then amazing the day of. Were there more expensive halls out there that I could have fallen in love with? Most likely, but I didn't look at venues that I thought would be too far out of our range. One thing to make sure of is not to bank on making the money back through gifts because you probably won't.
crisy211
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Posted by Lilnessa
I'd try to find one that you love that is more in your budget. My DH and I paid for our wedding ourselves and the venue/food was most important. I love love loved my venue and it was everything i wanted and they were more then amazing the day of. Were there more expensive halls out there that I could have fallen in love with? Most likely, but I didn't look at venues that I thought would be too far out of our range. One thing to make sure of is not to bank on making the money back through gifts because you probably won't.
This!!! We did not even inquire with venues we knew would be completely out of budget so when narrowing down halls we only had choices close to our range.
HSsweethearts
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Definitely keep looking.
What happenned for us was our original hall cancelled on us. They literally sold our date even though they had our deposit (crazy, right?) so when we found out my sister dragged us out THAT day to look at halls. I didn't want to look at The Inn because I knew it was out of budget but the second I walked in there, we all were just awed and we KNEW we had to have the wedding there.
Spending that amount definitely sets us back on buying a house, etc. Our hall alone cost pretty much our entire original wedding budget, but we just knew we weren't going to be happy anywhere else.
For that reason i totally suggest ONLY looking at places within your budget. You can always go for a less expensive RH and then add some over-the =top extras.
crisy211
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Re: Need Advice: is it worth it?
Posted by HSsweethearts
Definitely keep looking.
What happenned for us was our original hall cancelled on us. They literally sold our date even though they had our deposit (crazy, right?) so when we found out my sister dragged us out THAT day to look at halls. I didn't want to look at The Inn because I knew it was out of budget but the second I walked in there, we all were just awed and we KNEW we had to have the wedding there.
Spending that amount definitely sets us back on buying a house, etc. Our hall alone cost pretty much our entire original wedding budget, but we just knew we weren't going to be happy anywhere else.
For that reason i totally suggest ONLY looking at places within your budget. You can always go for a less expensive RH and then add some over-the =top extras.
omg I can't believe that happened!!!!!! how can they legally do that?? so glad it worked out in the end and you found the perfect place.
mara1017
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I did not go crazy when it came to vendors for our wedding. To me it was more important to purchase a house (which we did about 10 months prior to the wedding) and save money for our future family.
I do not regret my decision AT ALL. I had the most amazing day and it was beautiful. I did not feel like I needed to spend $150 a person to have a beautiful day. To me it is about the little details (and I had many of these).
I was married almost 2 months ago and people are still telling me that my wedding was one of the nicest ones they have ever been to
