Need advice re: BM also need to vent...

OK, so last year I lived in the city with one of my very good friends as my roommate. She had a boyfriend who was over ALL the time. I'm talking EVERY night! He did nothing as far as buying food, supplies, toilet paper, etc. He'd even wash the dishes he used and leave my one cup in the sink. As if to say 'see I clean up after myself'. I finally broke down and told my friend that her boyfriend's presence was annoying me and that I did not feel 100% comfortable with him basically living with us rent free. We compromised on him staying over only the weekends. Fine. He was still an *** and did nothing around the apt, beside leave his beard shavings in the sink.

On the day I was to move out, my FH came over and helped with the packing. We lugged boxes and furniture up and down. What did this boy do? He watched us. He never offered to help. My friend did what she could as far as helping us.

On Christmas I drove by my friends house and he was outside talking to her cousin. I stop my car to say hi and merry Christmas. The cousin comes running over to greet me. The boy just stares at me. No hello, nothing!

So here is my problem.... She is one of my BM. Can I go without inviting him to the wedding? I really hate him! The thought of spending XX amount of $$s on his meal makes me ill. By the way, he is like a VERY picky eater and will eat nothing anyway. He's like a male anorexic or something.

Advice please! Thanks in advance...

-Stacie

You should invite him. Your beef is with him, not her. I think it would seriously hurt your friendship with your BM if you didn't.

Have you ever talked to hear about your feelings about him?

He is a jerk! And my friend is so sweet, but for some reason..... who knows why she is with him???!!!! He is a loner, cheapsake. She likes to go ut and have a good time.

My FH says I am being petty.. you know, just F**k him. But he gets under my skin for some reason.

I'm sorry, but there is no way you can invite your BM without this guy. We are all adults and you can't tell people who they can/cannot date. So long as he's her boyfriend, if you invite you friend anywhere, that includes him.
We have a similar issue coming up. My BIL is getting married in June and a friend of his now dates his exgirlfriend (they've been broken up for years.) anyway, BIL's fiance is still very jealous of his ex and I know they're going to try to invite our guy friend without a date. I can tell you, he will NOT attend their wedding if he's invited without his girlfriend. It's wrong and disrespectful.
If someone ivited me somewhere without DH, even when we were just dating, I would never have even thought of attending without him. It would most certainly put a large strain on my 'friendship' with whoever it was that didn't invite him.

Look at it this way, at least he's not family!!! I can't stand my FBIL's fiance, she just drives me nuts, is fixated on our relationship and always wants to 'talk', grrrrrr. Sorry took over your rant!

Anyway, My point really was, invite the jerk and maybe by the wedding they will break up! There is hope yet!!!

CKGM, I too am hoping they break up before the wedding.

OK, so I'll be an adult and tolerate his presence there. But I am NOT writing his name! The invitation will read.. : Ms. Anne Jones and Guest.

Yea he sounds like an *** and I am sure he knows how you feel about him however there really is no way to not invite him to the wedding unless you want to compromise your friendship with this girl.
However I totally feel your pain but there is really no way to get out of this.
Good luck!

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Posted by stacie0877

CKGM, I too am hoping they break up before the wedding.

OK, so I'll be an adult and tolerate his presence there. But I am NOT writing his name! The invitation will read.. : Ms. Anne Jones and Guest.

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The passive/agressive approach always works!