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Need advice this will be long
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Re: Need advice this will be long
not to sound harsh, but i think he needs to let it go and stop being a baby. these people have been wonderful to you and not inviting them to your wedding over something that small is a little extreme. tell him to stop being such a grudge holder.
ETA- i knwo her parents were the ones that helped you out.. but shes your BEST FRIEND.
ETA- i knwo her parents were the ones that helped you out.. but shes your BEST FRIEND.
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Re: Need advice this will be long
You should absolutely invite them... they will decide whether to come or not. Or....at least try to get together and hash things out as adults beforehand.
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Re: Need advice this will be long
ahhh this is a tough situation you're in. do YOU want them there? I think your FH should accept your wishes. If you want them there, you need to tell him how you feel. Perhaps also you can have a talk with bf beforehand about how FH is still mad about the incident but you really want them there.... basically just to insinuate to her to tell her bf to behave (if necessary)?
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Re: Need advice this will be long
IMO as it is his day its also urs. I think u should really explain to him how important it is for u to have her and her family at ur wedding. after all u gonna have so many guests, what 2 more. he doesnt have to speak to them, or anything. I am pretty sure he will barely notice them there from all the excitement of the day.
I really dont think u should give up ppl u care about b/c of a stupid incident yrs ago.
I really dont think u should give up ppl u care about b/c of a stupid incident yrs ago.
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Re: Need advice this will be long
I'm sorry but I'd invite them.
She and her parents were there for you when you needed someone the most, they treat your daughter (and yourself) like family. I personally would be damned if FH told me I couldn't invite my bestfriend. I'm sorry, JMHO.
not inviting them could strain your relationship with bf and her family, inviting them could actually heal this whole thing.
tell FH you are inviting them, I'm sure they can keep their distance from him. there will be other guests there, its not like its a private dinner with just the 4 of you and your forced to communicate, they will most likely come over, congratulate you then sit and enjoy the evening.
She and her parents were there for you when you needed someone the most, they treat your daughter (and yourself) like family. I personally would be damned if FH told me I couldn't invite my bestfriend. I'm sorry, JMHO.
not inviting them could strain your relationship with bf and her family, inviting them could actually heal this whole thing.
tell FH you are inviting them, I'm sure they can keep their distance from him. there will be other guests there, its not like its a private dinner with just the 4 of you and your forced to communicate, they will most likely come over, congratulate you then sit and enjoy the evening.
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Re: Need advice this will be long
you dnot have to like all of FH friends and he doesnt have to like all of yours.
He should be enjoying the happiest day of his life with you and not concerning himself with others. He doenst even have to talk to him.
Sorry, but I think he is wrong and needs to accept that these people are in your life.
BUT... do not invite them because you are invited the parents. Only invite them if you want them there
He should be enjoying the happiest day of his life with you and not concerning himself with others. He doenst even have to talk to him.
Sorry, but I think he is wrong and needs to accept that these people are in your life.
BUT... do not invite them because you are invited the parents. Only invite them if you want them there
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Re: Need advice this will be long
My FH holds on to things too, and I totally get your frustration. Can't you just explain to him that it's only ONE day that he has to deal with them and really you guys are going to be so happy and busy that day, that there's no room for problems. HTH
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Re: Need advice this will be long
If you don't invite them, i think it will stir up more issues. So just to avoid more stress just invite them. I'm sure your FH will not be worry about them on your wedding day :)
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Re: Need advice this will be long
I understand that it's both of your weddings, but them not being there will be more upsetting for you than them being there for him. He won't even realize they're there - he'll be too busy. I think that you should talk to FH and tell him that these ppl are like family to you and you want them there.
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Re: Need advice this will be long
FH's pride is hurt and that's a tough thing to deal with, but he needs to suuck it up! These were the people there for you when you needed help most and and therefore, very important to you. They should be invited regardless of what occurred between your bf's boyfriend and FH. FH will get over it eventually.
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Re: Need advice this will be long
I think FH is holding a grudge too. And I agree that there will be so much going on that we wont notice them there at all.
It's unfortunately more complicated than what I could even fit in that post. My bf isnt the most friendliest person in the world, in fact her personality is what you could call quite 'abrasive'. Her and I arent even very close the last few years..but we have such a long history, I consider her more family than a friend.
Her parents are the most important issue to me. And I could never in a million years hurt them, so basically, I guess I just have to put my foot down and insist my friend and her bf are invited.
I JUST WISH I DIDNT HAVE THIS STRESS TO DEAL WITH!!!
Anyway, thanks for listening to me vent.
It's unfortunately more complicated than what I could even fit in that post. My bf isnt the most friendliest person in the world, in fact her personality is what you could call quite 'abrasive'. Her and I arent even very close the last few years..but we have such a long history, I consider her more family than a friend.
Her parents are the most important issue to me. And I could never in a million years hurt them, so basically, I guess I just have to put my foot down and insist my friend and her bf are invited.
I JUST WISH I DIDNT HAVE THIS STRESS TO DEAL WITH!!!
Anyway, thanks for listening to me vent.
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Re: Need advice this will be long
I agree w/what the other ladies are saying. I would invite them but talk to FH and acknowledge that you understand its his day too but this is causing you stress and it would mean the world to you if he could move on from the situation. HTH good luck!!! ![]()
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