I have an ex-BM that I just found out has been gossiping about me to our mutual friends. She says I've been flaunting my new car and that she didnt want to show me her e-ring because i'd be jealous because (supposedly) hers is nicer. Meanwhile, none of that is true!
Here's the funny thing, 3 weeks before my wedding she emails me that she hopes everything goes well, and to email her pics, and that I should try to relax on my HM, etc. And then in july she sends me text messages wishing me a happy birthday. What the F$%^? She talks about me behind my back and then pretends to be my friend!
What would you do? Email her back to F$% off? Not even acknowledge the email? I wasn't going to respond at all to her email because we had a BIG fight after I told her she didnt have to be in my BP if she was too busy. But now i found out she's been talking about me behind my back! That's just so childish!
Shell84
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Re: Need 'friend' advice...
If you guys were close, I will call her and find out why she's talking about you behind your back.
if you weren't, just forget that the lil B$tch even exist
EGreene79
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I don't know if calling her or emailing back is worth it. Girls are catty, and that's that ... you're better off ending it here. Plus, if things calm down in the future, and you become friends again, you won't have to feel bad about this. I've had several fall outs over the last 20 years, and am still friends with most of those girls.
sarahradio5
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Re: Need 'friend' advice...
ooooh... i had one of those once! She wanted me to be in her bridal party, but then always talked about me behind my back! I dropped out of her bridal party.
I want to vote for F$#% off, but I think you should do it in a 'rise above' kind of way. Tell her how wrong she is... what a better person you are than her... how she's not gonna get far in life being how she is... how you feel sorry for her that she doesn't know how to be a good friend and that she doesn't know how to keep a good friend when she has one... that she's so petty about the engagement ring thing when you are proud and happy with your ring and wouldn't trade it for hers for all the money in the world... and how it's unfortunate that a friendship has to end like this, but knowing what she's been saying about you, you have to wonder if she ever was a real friend to begin with. 'Good luck with your wedding... it was nice knowing you'.
So, kind of like F$%# off in a more mature and 'teach her a lesson in life' kind of way.
I'm sorry you're going through this... sux, doesn't it? You'll be much happier without someone like this in your life.
HearzBellz
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Honestly, She knows what she is doing, she knows why she is doing it. do you need a friend like that? I'd tell her to eff off
sarahthegreat
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don't go down to her level, em. act like it you never knew her, i think that would hurt her more then bytching her out.
MichLiz213
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I would call her on it. Tell her what you've been hearing. See what happens (besides hearing her backtrack and say 'I would NEVER do that!')
I really shouldn't give advice when I'm half asleep and exhausted. I sound really bitter and grumpy!
sugarkube4
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you can try and be the better person and than her for her well wishes..
Keywi231
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I am the type of person where I will say what I feel and if I feel ( or hear) things being said about me behind my back your going to hear my mouth especially because I have no shame talking crap to your face, don't be nice anymore deal with it and get it over, If she can do this to you then you know she is not your 'true friend'...
I think you have to ask yourself if she's worth it. Do you want to maintain some sort of friendship with her? If so, then I'd call her up and ask her what's going on. If you want nothing to do with her, then fck it - don't even waste your time thinking about her.
Marly
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She's not worth the time or the energy, cut her off. You don't need a so called friend like that anyway. I wouldn't even give her a second thought. You are so much better then that, don't lower yourself to her level.
lilqtpie2181
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Em.. u dont need people like that in ur life. I would write the e-mail tellin gher to just forget u rform her vocabulary since u know that she has been talking about you behind you back and u dont need to have 'fake' people around you. Basically tellin gher Fu*k off in a nice way so that she dones have any more things to say about you... I hope this helped.. P.S. miss u chicka.. call me...mwa
drpepper318
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ooooh I'd be soo pissed I'd definitely have to say something... people like that need to hear it
rojerono
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I would like to say 'don't acknowledge her' - but I am not that wholesome. I would want her to KNOW that a. you are aware of her double tongue b. that your friends are not going to keep her nasty little remarks to themselves and it will get back to you.
I would write her back - but I would NOT be nasty. People like that love to play the victim and she would use your (justified) anger to play that card to the hilt.
You ought to write back and let her know that you are sad and disappointed in her behaviour. That she hurt you terribly, and that you simply don't think you have room in your life for someone who expends so much energy on badmouthing you behind your back.
Like I said... I couldn't just let it go without letting HER know that you are aware of what she has been doing...
nala3378
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See this is why I have three friends all from different parts of my life...
Girls a caddy b%&^#*$....
I would call her and be like what the F*@# is your problem...
jenn122397
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I had a problem with a friend - not a BM, this was a while back. Basically she just stopped talking to me for no apparent reasosn - she even dropped all her courses at school! Long story short - i see her in the mall like 3-4months later and i confronted her because if i didnt do it then i never would have and i know i would have regretted it. I still got no answer as to why she wont speak to me but it made me feel better. I would definitely call her or meet up with her - often emails get mixed messages.
aliwnec10
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Re: Need 'friend' advice...
I wouldn't definitely confront her only because i hate not knowing why. But that's just me.
Just call her or meet with her and casually ask whats going on. Don't get mad or attack her because then things can turn ugly and you want to give her a chance to tell her story first.
Good luck!
Jesses Girl
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Re: Need 'friend' advice...
If you know for a fact that she is talking about you behind your back I wouldnt even acknowledge her.
but if it is all what you have been hearing...call he and be straight with her. Or maybe email her back and be front. If she calls or writes back fine. if not forget her. I have come to realize that as I get older...if girls want to talk...let them you dont need them.
you have ur man...ur close friends...u dont need anyone who will bring ya down.!
neener1211
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call her on it...I did it to someone, and they just stood there with their mouth open for 2 minutes...it was great that they had nothing to say about me when I confronted them....hahaha...it was a great feeling.
kitty1224
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confront her and then deciede if you have time for people like that, because It's ****ed up to me and I don't have time for childish people.
