NEED HELP I AM DOING MY INVITATIONS NOW

Ok I am doing my invitations and I am only addressing the outer envelopes How do write

Mr. and Mrs. John Doe & Family

or

Mr. & Mrs. John Doe and Family

I didn't want to list their kids names b/c there are 3 of them

and how do I type

Mr. and Mrs. John Doe & Son

or Mr. & Mrs. John Doe and Son

They have one kid and its an infant

Check out this website...

Invite wording

Your situation is difficult because you said you are only addressing the outer envelope..according to this website a married couple with children under the age of 13 gets addressed:
Mr. and Mrs. Michael Smith

and the inner envelope is

Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Rachel and Alex

If I had to choose I would use the '&'