Need major advice!!!!!!!

ladybug78 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 10:14 AM

Need major advice!!!!!!!

2 of our guy friends were invited to our wedding with their wives...Their wives can't come so the guys want to bring 2 of their other friends that FH and I aren't friends with...How do we go about telling them that if their wive can't come, they can't bring these other 2 guys with them?? I think it is so rude of them to do this and now FH and I are put into a tough situation.

ChrissynRicky Posted: Oct 03, 2005 10:16 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

OMG! I couldn't even imagine someone suggesting something like that.

I'd have FI speak to them and let them know that the guestlist is tight right now, and if there's room available, then they can bring a guest.

lishbone Posted: Oct 03, 2005 10:18 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by ladybug78

2 of our guy friends were invited to our wedding with their wives...Their wives can't come so the guys want to bring 2 of their other friends that FH and I aren't friends with...How do we go about telling them that if their wive can't come, they can't bring these other 2 guys with them?? I think it is so rude of them to do this and now FH and I are put into a tough situation.

KARA..Now there is 2? i feel so bad for you...why do people think they can just invite anyone.. im sorry you are going through this..im stumped on this one..i feel they should already know this...

lishbone Posted: Oct 03, 2005 10:20 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by ChristineAE

OMG! I couldn't even imagine someone suggesting something like that.

I'd have FI speak to them and let them know that the guestlist is tight right now, and if there's room available, then they can bring a guest.

kara i agree with this....they were invited knowing that they were married....and would bring their wives..your guest list is tight enough..i would tell them exactly what ChristineAE said..this way it doesnt look like you are the bad one...hope this works out for you

J&D 09/16 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 10:21 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Did the invites say ang guest or the name of the wife? If it's and guest, you may be stuck, but if it Mr & Mrs so and so, it's really rude of them to even ask. I would go with the space is really tight angle.
I really don't understand people sometimes. Its a wedding not a frat party!
Hang in there!

Blu-ize Posted: Oct 03, 2005 10:23 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

There is no need to explain to them. Simply, the answer is no. There should not be people at your wedding that you are not related to or not friends with.

ladybug78 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 10:32 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by J&D 09/16

Did the invites say ang guest or the name of the wife? If it's and guest, you may be stuck, but if it Mr & Mrs so and so, it's really rude of them to even ask. I would go with the space is really tight angle.
I really don't understand people sometimes. Its a wedding not a frat party!
Hang in there!

They were both invited as Mr. and Mrs. *******...I just can't believe that they would put us in this situation...

LuckyMe Posted: Oct 03, 2005 11:20 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

I would just come out and tell them NO! Laugh it off to break the tension but definetly tell them NO!!

ChrissynRicky Posted: Oct 03, 2005 11:22 AM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by ladybug78

Posted by J&D 09/16

Did the invites say ang guest or the name of the wife? If it's and guest, you may be stuck, but if it Mr & Mrs so and so, it's really rude of them to even ask. I would go with the space is really tight angle.
I really don't understand people sometimes. Its a wedding not a frat party!
Hang in there!

They were both invited as Mr. and Mrs. *******...I just can't believe that they would put us in this situation...

Stand your Ground!

ladybug78 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:10 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Thanks for the advice girls...Anyone else?

SomethingBlu Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:11 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by ladybug78

Thanks for the advice girls...Anyone else?

No other advice...stand your ground. If they choose not to come, then you save the $$. That's insane!

ladybug78 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:17 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by SomethingBlu

Posted by ladybug78

Thanks for the advice girls...Anyone else?

No other advice...stand your ground. If they choose not to come, then you save the $$. That's insane!

Thank you for making me feel like its OK to say no to them!!!

smurray Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:18 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by Blu-ize

There is no need to explain to them. Simply, the answer is no. There should not be people at your wedding that you are not related to or not friends with.

Exactly I can't even imagine why someone would suggest something like that. I would feel very uncomfortable if i were at a wedding where I didn't even know the bride or groom.
What In The World Are People Thinking About These Days?
Are the friends that they are trying to bring women? Either way thats just crazy

TheBigDay Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:20 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

That is rude! I assume you didnt write the invite to the husbands and guest! if you wrote it out to the husbands and the wife then they have no right to just invite anyone! Do some people not realize how $$$ these things are to just bring friends cause those invited can not make it!

Not very fair that they are putting you in that position!

ladybug78 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:23 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by smurray

Posted by Blu-ize

There is no need to explain to them. Simply, the answer is no. There should not be people at your wedding that you are not related to or not friends with.

Exactly I can't even imagine why someone would suggest something like that. I would feel very uncomfortable if i were at a wedding where I didn't even know the bride or groom.
What In The World Are People Thinking About These Days?
Are the friends that they are trying to bring women? Either way thats just crazy

One wants to bring the younger brother of a guy we are friends with but we really don't know the brother...The other one wants to bring the sister of a friend of ours that we really don't know either...Its crazy!!! I hate having to deal with this!!! I just can't believe people would do that considering the response card is addressed to my parents, who are paying...No respect.

EmberLynn Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:24 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Well if you put on the invite 'Mr. Smith and guest' a guest could be ANYONE. If you put down Mr and Mrs. Smith then yes its quite rude. Explain to the men that you really don't along with those men they picked and because plates are so expensive you were hoping for a few less guest than you invited.

SomethingBlu Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:25 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by ladybug78

Posted by SomethingBlu

Posted by ladybug78

Thanks for the advice girls...Anyone else?

No other advice...stand your ground. If they choose not to come, then you save the $$. That's insane!

Thank you for making me feel like its OK to say no to them!!!

You're welcome sweetie!

I know it's overwhelming...I was there. I had guests invite themselves with guests, invite themselves with kids, not come because I didn't invite other family members. In the end, I had to remind myself and DH why the 'party' was taking place. It was in celebration of our marriage...of our union as husband as wife. I wanted that to come accross, it wasn't just a party...and I didn't want strangers there. Did I have a lot of people not come? Yes. But were we surrounded by our closest, nearest and dearest as a result? Absolutely.
Stand your ground...this is not a Sweet 16...

ladybug78 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 02:33 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by SomethingBlu

Posted by ladybug78

Posted by SomethingBlu

Posted by ladybug78

Thanks for the advice girls...Anyone else?

No other advice...stand your ground. If they choose not to come, then you save the $$. That's insane!

Thank you for making me feel like its OK to say no to them!!!

You're welcome sweetie!

I know it's overwhelming...I was there. I had guests invite themselves with guests, invite themselves with kids, not come because I didn't invite other family members. In the end, I had to remind myself and DH why the 'party' was taking place. It was in celebration of our marriage...of our union as husband as wife. I wanted that to come accross, it wasn't just a party...and I didn't want strangers there. Did I have a lot of people not come? Yes. But were we surrounded by our closest, nearest and dearest as a result? Absolutely.
Stand your ground...this is not a Sweet 16...

You are exactly right!!! Its not a frat party, or a sweet 16...Its a wedding...A celebration of the start of our new life.

LaurenluvsTJ Posted: Oct 03, 2005 03:25 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

the answer is NO, you cannot invite your friends. They are completely rude for even asking you that.

LFitzy79 Posted: Oct 03, 2005 03:31 PM

Re: Need major advice!!!!!!!

Posted by ladybug78

Posted by SomethingBlu

Posted by ladybug78

Thanks for the advice girls...Anyone else?

No other advice...stand your ground. If they choose not to come, then you save the $$. That's insane!

Thank you for making me feel like its OK to say no to them!!!

It's totally okay to say no to them-ask them if they have LOST thier minds???

Is there any chance they are playing a practical joke on you? I just can't imagine anyone doing this....wouldn't thier wives tell them it's completely rude????

At any rate, you shouldn't feel badly at all-they are being really obnoxious. Tell them absolutely not, and if they don't like it, then they don't have to come.