Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

JamieAnt06202009 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:26 AM

Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

One of my cousins and I were always close growing up until about 5 years ago. I won't get into all of it but she has some issues and I have always been there for her. Every time we make plans for all of the cousins to get together at the last minute she is sick (this hasn't happened only once or twice but about 15 times). So my engagement party was Sunday and she was supposed to come early (at 11:30) to be measured for her BM dress. We chose this day because she lives in Jersey and I didn't want her to have to make 2 trips. The appointment was for 12 and at 11:30 on the dot I got a text message from her saying that she wasn't feeling well and couldn't make...no apology or anything. So here it what I want to send but I need to know if it sounds good.

Hope your feeling better. I really want you to be a part of my wedding because you are my cousin and we had so many wonderful times growing up. You have been getting sick every time we have something planned...well there are some important things coming up and sick or not you really have to be there...those things are my shower and my wedding. Bridesmaids are a big part of those two days so I really need you there not only as a bridesmaid but as my cousin because I love you and want you to share in these once in a lifetime things. I know you weren't feeling well but I couldn't help but feel a little hurt and sad because I was really looking forward to seeing you and having you at the only engagement party I will ever have. I really want you to be my bridesmaid but if you feel that you can't commit then let me know, I promise I won't be mad or angry. Of course I want you to be a bridesmaid more than anything but I want to make sure you're up for the task.

meara Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:33 AM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

I think it's really good to send her. . you did a nice job of making it not threatening and sweet. Only thing I might change it to put this line a little later..

'You have been getting sick every time we have something planned' b/c even though it's true, she might get defensive. .soo go right into .'.well there are some important things coming up and it's imp to me that everyone in the party is, there.. I know you have been having some health issues lately so I wanted to say if you feel like you can't committ'

anyway - you can prob write it better. Good luck and I hope she pulls through for you

Jsquared279 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:38 AM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

I think that sounds perfect. I think it is very diplomatic and kind, while getting the point across. What do you think she will say?

littlepixie12 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:40 AM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

I think it sounds very sweet, I would send it

JamieAnt06202009 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:41 AM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

Posted by Jsquared279

I think that sounds perfect. I think it is very diplomatic and kind, while getting the point across. What do you think she will say?

Honestly she probably won't answer which will make me feel even worse but I think that if she doesn't respond that will be an answer enough for me. I am getting so upset over this. I actually woke up last night from 2:30am til 5am and couldn't sleep because I was thinking of what to say.

Christaly Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:44 AM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

I like it! I think it is very well put especially considering the strong feelings you have about it.

I'm not sure I could be that diplomatic in that situation - I'm incredibly passionate and hot headed.

ajlgmm815 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:45 AM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

It sounds great not mean but stating your feelings. good job!

JamieAnt06202009 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 11:47 AM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

I sent it...so nervous. I hope she responds.

angels914 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 12:05 PM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

I am glad you sent that to her... you said what you had to say and was very nice about it !!!!!!!!! I hope that she finds it in her heart to respond back to you . keep us updated !!!!!
Now put a smile on your face !!!!!!!!!

MaggieLuvsJoe Posted: Sep 23, 2008 12:07 PM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

I think what you want to send her is perfectly said, you seem very concerned about her. I really hope she does respond to you but if she doesnt I guess you have your answer. Good Luck with her.

baba022 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 12:12 PM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

Good that you sent it. Is she an anxious person?? Like doesnt like to travel or is something going on with her?? I know someone like this and as hurtful as it can be, I also have to be understanding. So yes, it is good that you told her how you feel (she is your cuz) but you also have to know whats going on with her. BUT she also has to give you the reassurance that when it comes time for the wedding she will be there.....And if she feels just as close to you as you do to her, I wouldnt worry - she will write back.....

dazey Posted: Sep 23, 2008 12:37 PM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

it's written in a very nice way. i'd say it's perfect, but i hope she gets it and changes her behavior.

PROBM Posted: Sep 23, 2008 12:56 PM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

she is not making any effort to be a part of your day so why push it ? even if she responds to this emai she clearly is not putting any effort. i think its important to put your feelings out there so she can not claim misscommunication but either way the bottom line is that something is going on and she does not WANT to play a part in your special day

focus, love and appreciate the people that want to be apart of your day and try to forget about the others

BarbieGrl10 Posted: Sep 23, 2008 01:30 PM

Re: Need opinions - Is this good to send to my cousin Kind of long

She sounds flaky! Sorry hun!
I think what you wrote is perfect to send. If she doesn't respond in 2 weeks I would send her another email letting her know that she is not in my BP anymore. Nothing mean but kinda like you get what you give type of email.