Need opinions Now with an UPDATE!!

Thus far I have been very open to letting my BP make choices, but I feel like now(esp. my sister who is one of my MOH's, i have 2) is taking advantage fo this.

I want all the girls in full length dresses,m shes whining saying she wants tea length and its like a battle if she doesnt get her way and gives me attitude and I can't be stressing over this.

2 of my BMs had requested straps, and the 2 MOHS want strapless.

FH told me that I'm the and it should be my choice, and that if I want them al in the same dress and make the 2 MOHs stand out by using larger diff. bouquets instead then i sholud just do that. thing is I don't know how the other 2 wil react if I now tell them I would prefer them all to wear strapless dresses. One of my MOH(my best friend) told me its my wedding and whatever dress I want is what everyone should wear and not to worry about it, but I don't know if this will cause drama. I just feel this is becoming everyone elses wedding other than mine.

What would you do?

UPDATE:
So I emailed one of my BMs that I didnt think would give me a hard time about the possiblity of everyone wearing strapless, and she writes back, 'Please reconsider about the strapless, I won't feel comfortable'

When you decided on the dresses unless you specified that they could choose their own dresses as long as its the color you wanted then no argument. But if you had no such conversation with them and you have mind set of what you want them to wear then they should respect your wishes and wear the dresses you ask them to. Its not their wedding its your's. Its not their decision its yours and if they want to make such a fuss that it cause friction... Tell them dont worry about it, not to bother, they are no longer in the wedding problem solved.

I would sit down with all of them and discuss the dresses. At my step sister's wedding all the girls had strapless dresses but two decided to add spaghetti straps to the dress and it looked nice, I don't even think anyone noticed because other than the straps it was the same dress.

Definitely sit down and talk with them and let them know how important it is to you. They should understand because yes you are the bride!!!

-Kris

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Posted by prettyprincess07

When you decided on the dresses unless you specified that they could choose their own dresses as long as its the color you wanted then no argument. But if you had no such conversation with them and you have mind set of what you want them to wear then they should respect your wishes and wear the dresses you ask them to. Its not their wedding its your's. Its not their decision its yours and if they want to make such a fuss that it cause friction... Tell them dont worry about it, not to bother, they are no longer in the wedding problem solved.

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well nothing was ever finalized nor have we gone to look yet. 2 had just requested straps, and i kinda agreed to it even though i wasnt 100% sure on what dress, but i feel like i keep letting everyone make choices and convince me of things.

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Posted by prettyprincess07

There is nothing wrong with being reasonable. But at some point you have to put your foot down and make choices. If you want the dresses to look uniform (all one style/color) then say so. If you dont mind (not half and half) that they choose different styles then let them know this but dont make it so that they are making the decisions for you and in the end you're the one unhappy about it.

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thats exactly it. I have one MOH(my best friend) who is awesome and so great with everything and says its my day whatever makes me happy. My sister though who I ended up making an MOH as well has given me a hard time. i let her pick out the color she chose my fav. color anyway, and i was fine with strapless. My FSIL I think is the one that will give me a hard time though about having everyone wear strapless.

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Posted by prettyprincess07

There is nothing wrong with being reasonable. But at some point you have to put your foot down and make choices. If you want the dresses to look uniform (all one style/color) then say so. If you dont mind (not half and half) that they choose different styles then let them know this but dont make it so that they are making the decisions for you and in the end you're the one unhappy about it.

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I agree i went through a similar situation w/colr of shoes in the end its the brides choice not theres put your foot down and do what you want

ITS YOUR WEDDING AND ITS YOUR CHOICE.....ITS NICE TO GET ALITTLE FEED BACK WITH WHAT THEY LIKE, BUT WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO THE FINAL ANSWER.....IT SHOULD BE YOURS AND THEY SHOULD RESPECT THAT!!!!

IF THEY DONT THEN MAYBE THEY SHOULD RETHINK AS TO WHY THEY SAID YES TO BEING IN YOUR BRIDAL PARTY

Your FH is right!!! You are the and if originally you were allowing your girls some say and they took advantage of that then you have every right to say they now have no say!

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Posted by AMANDA2378

ITS YOUR WEDDING AND ITS YOUR CHOICE.....ITS NICE TO GET ALITTLE FEED BACK WITH WHAT THEY LIKE, BUT WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO THE FINAL ANSWER.....IT SHOULD BE YOURS AND THEY SHOULD RESPECT THAT!!!!

IF THEY DONT THEN MAYBE THEY SHOULD RETHINK AS TO WHY THEY SAID YES TO BEING IN YOUR BRIDAL PARTY

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Agreed and well said... Think about it-- if it was their wedding you would NEVER be like 'no I don't want that-- I want tea length!!!' WHINE!! Ugh-- it's so unfair when people act like that-- but I bet you they would be the first ones annoyed if you did the same thing to them! Ugh!!!

So sorry, good luck

Your FH is correct and MOH. Its your day!!!!! You cannot please everyone!

I have noticed that my sis (also the one I made MOH) has been the most diffiult as well. For some reason sometimes family feels like they have more of an excuse to be 'outspoken' about their needs and concersn regardless of the bride and grooms.
I'm sorry that the dresses have to be such an issue for you. Ultimately, it is your wedding and the dress you say goes...even though I knoe you probably want to make everyone happy.

I have to kind of agree with your bridesmaid, as a large chested gal myself, it is EXTREMELY hard for me to wear a strapless dress that isn't basically a corset. It prevents me from having a good time...just something to keep in mind...>IF it is the same dress as all the girls, just with straps, it really isn't that noticeable, besides, everyone is looking at you anyway.

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Posted by daniebc16

I have to kind of agree with your bridesmaid, as a large chested gal myself, it is EXTREMELY hard for me to wear a strapless dress that isn't basically a corset. It prevents me from having a good time...just something to keep in mind...>IF it is the same dress as all the girls, just with straps, it really isn't that noticeable, besides, everyone is looking at you anyway.

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shes not large chested at all though