I just got a call from my Cantor that they will not accept my son into Hebrew School. My husband is catholic and we have a very italian last name but my son had his bris and never had a baptism. They came out when I registered over the phone and told me the Cantor will give me a call. I am so devestated right now. He even asked for the tickets back for the High Holiday.
I am so upset. Does anybody know of any reform temple that will accept us, in Queens. or Little Neck Area the farthest. I just cannt think of their names off the top of head.
I am so upset !!!!!!!!
Lisa Rose
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Re: Need some HELP on religion
I thought that in the Jewish religion, the children followed the mother's faith and if you are Jewish, how can they not accept your son into Hebrew school?????? That is the most rediculous thing I have ever heard!!
Jax430
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That's terrible!! I've never heard anything like that...according to the Jewish religion, if the mother is Jewish, the child is Jewish. My family belongs to a Conservative temple, and we have kids in the Hebrew school where the mother isn't Jewish, and they are still accepted. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. Things like this make me so angry!!! I don't know of any reform synagogues near you, as I just moved to Queens myself, but I will try to find out.
t
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I was raised conservative then married an Italian, so I am now reformed. I always thought if the mother is jewish the child is Jewish too.
It just hurts more because it is less then a week to the holidays. And with school stating they should have called me before especially since they had my info for about three weeks.
nferrandi
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What reason did they give you because that just doesn't sound right! I went to Hebrew school (in Westchester) with no problem and I have an Italian last name, but my mom is Jewish.
t
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Cantor: does he practice the catholic faith?
Me: Im not going to lie and rather be up front about it. Yes, he goes for christmas and the important holidays.
(pretty much when we can take him)
Cantor: He can not.
Me: Is there something I can do to make sure he can get his Bar Mitzvah?
Cantor: I dont know what to tell you
Me: starts asked for advice to a man who wants me to deny my son his hritage.
I said okay. Thank you
Now, thinking it through since they will not accept my son, they will not accept me. I think I am going to mail back holiday tickets and all paperwork they sent me and put a nice little note saying please refund my money. Since my son is not welcome I am not wecome. And then and something else exactly what at the moment I dont know.
nferrandi
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Re: Need some HELP on religion
I am so sorry that you're dealing with this, it's absolute BS! I would definitely send the tickets back. If they're not willing to accept your son than you should want no part of that congregation, and they should have no problem refunding your money because that shouldn't be 'good' enough for them either. It's stories like this that make me want to turn my back on organized religion.
barb04
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Re: Need some HELP on religion
I can't believe they wouldn't accept your son. I'm so sorry that this happened to you. I hope this helps, here's a directory of reform congregations in New York. Union for Reform Judaism
t
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barb04 - I love you thanks. But it doesnt have flushing or my surrounding area. BUT, I am sure I can go to one of them even if I have to drive Thanks
heidla
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Posted by t
barb04 - I love you thanks. But it doesnt have flushing or my surrounding area. BUT, I am sure I can go to one of them even if I have to drive Thanks
I bet that if you all one of the ones in that listing they can point you in the right direction.
I also would like to add how I think that what they are doing is inexcusable. What a sad ordeal for you and your family.
luckybride2004
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Re: Need some HELP on religion
You should also try speaking with the Rabbi of the Temple as well as the President or anyone else of authority. They most certainly can not 'not accept' your son into the Hebrew School! That is complete discrimination! Why doesn't he believe that you are Jewish? It doesn't even matter what the Father's religion is unless this is an Orthodox Shul.
luckybride2004
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Re: Need some HELP on religion
Also, try this New York Temples This lists teples of all levels but there are quite a few in Flushing. You know, after a little bit of thought as to my last post, I think you should write a letter to the Temple President and copy the Rabbi and Cantor as to the way you have been treated. They are discriminating against you and your family.
Good Luck!!
marymoon
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Re: Need some HELP on religion
Some Orthodox customs dictate that BOTH parents must be jewish, but I don't think that's the case here. it seems like some kind of misunderstanding at best and a case of discrimination at worst.
mrswask
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I think that is absolutely disgusting!! I would definitely raise h*ll with the president, the rabbi, etc. I would also remind them that with 50% of young Jewish people leaving the religion, they should be ASHAMED of themselves for turning away a Jewish mother and son. It's people like them who are driving us away!!!
eogara
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Oh boy. This is precisely the reason I am against institutional religion. It's not for inclusion but rather exluding everyone that's not just like them.
If I were you I would not even attempt to right the wrong ths man did at that particular temple. If that's how they're treating you, what are they teaching those kids in Hebrew school?
I'd call one of those reformed temples and speak to them about the situation. Seems like you just had a run in with one a$$ of a rabbi.
groovypeg
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i can't believe someone asked for your tickets back. that is disgusting. you should call and complain to the president of that shul. and, as far as i know, it is the mother who determines the child's religion, so how can they deny your son???
what's the name of this shul?
t
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I still have not decided what to do but I am thinking of sending all my papers back including my tickets with a letter stating how I was disciminated againest. AND cc:, AJC and UJC
Thanks for all your help. School starts Sunday for most of the schools I called, hours between 9:30 - 11:00 and I would like him to go to childresn mass in church which of course will be 9:30, so I get screwed anyway
Jax430
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I was just looking online...there is the Reform Temple of Forest Hills, but I dont' know if this is the one that gave you such a problem. I am so ANGRY for you. It's people like this that turn people away from Judaism, which is the last thing we need!!!!
marymoon
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It reminds me of last year. i took a class taught by the university jewish chaplain and the head of hillel. He mentioned in class about helping students get tickets for the high holidays at local temples. So I approachd him about it after class. I said 'i'm looking for a place to go for rosh hashanah' and he replied 'good luck with that.'
I was really angry.
eogara
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Posted by Jax430
I was just looking online...there is the Reform Temple of Forest Hills, but I dont' know if this is the one that gave you such a problem. I am so ANGRY for you. It's people like this that turn people away from Judaism, which is the last thing we need!!!!
Hey, that's 2 blocks away from me! I park in front of there a lot
