Need to Vent about FH's parents-LONG

I really need to vent b/c I am so upset. Since we got engaged last summer, FH's dad and stepmom (whom he grew up with b/c real mom passed away when he was 8) told us that they will host (meaning pay for) our rehearsal dinner. Well a few weeks ago when we brought it up about needing to book it to FFIL, he didn't say anything.

We hadn't heard from FIL's for 3 weeks, and then last night FFIL called, and said that they can't pay for the RD, AND they may no even be able to come to the wedding.

They are SO selfish, I can't even believe it. They just spent over 2 months down in FL, renting houses on the water b/c it's what THEY wanted to do, but when it comes to FH they couldn't care less. They did all this stuff, plus more for FH's step-brother.

Now, I'm afraid what my mom is going to say since she is the type that over reacts, and b/c my parents are super generous, and are paying for A LOT when it comes to this wedding or anything else for my brother and I.

Plus, I'm also upset b/c we picked out our invites from Encore, and now we need to go pick cheaper invites b/c we need to save money pay for the RD ourselves.

Sorry this is so long, but I just need to tell someone that will understand how I feel.

Oh man, that stinks! Is there something else going on between them? Has your FH talked to them? That's not right especially if they already said they would take care of the RD.

what was their reason for not paying and possibly not coming? That is the horrible part- a lot of parents cant afford to pay for things but to not even go!!!??

What did you say when they told you guys? did you have a chance to talk about it all together?

Why on earth would they not be able to come?

Thank you girls so much for just reading that, it made me feel better to just post it.

We don't live in the same state as they do, so they told FH via telephone. We were visiting last month, but they didn't mention it to us. We haven't and probably won't talk about it since. His family is weird, and not all that close. Pretty much the complete opposite of my family.

JPC1125-I agree that them saying they weren't even going to come was even worse. And I agree that a lot of parents can't even pay for things which is understandable, but they're not one of them (that's why I mentioned how they went to FL for two months this winter, rented a house on the beach and just vacationed).

I am sorry this happened. I hope everything gets better.

I sort of know the feeling. FHs parents can't afford the RD and they did not seem to even offer something inexpensive, though they did offer their home. Now they seem unhappy with our selection of food (for those of you who know me, yes there will be meat so that is not it, they are just really picky eaters). And my father is paying for all the food at the wedding.

Because I know both of his parents and my father can be fickle we have just planned for the worst in all situations.

why would his dad want to come for the wedding?

that really stinks, I'm sorry

IMO... since your folks are already paying so much, I would definitely insist that they don't pay for the RD.

Would it be so terrible to not have one?

so sorry to hear that! Your parents will behind you and help you.

just here to offer some

aww hon that *****. I'm sorry you have to deal with all this

But what I don't understand is what their reasoning is for not attending the wedding completely? OK, so they have to back out of the RD deal but why not attend their sons wedding? Thats terrible. Im sorry!!!!!!!!

Thank you ladies so much! I'm starting to feel better about the whole RD thing, and decided that we'll just save money by not having an open bar at the RD. This way we can still have it at a really nice place, but save some money. (I would never ask my parents to pay for it). I've also decided not to order my expensive invites, and have started looking at other options.

I'm really not sure what's going on with his parents, and since FH was never really close with them, I doubt we'll know the truth. The only reason I can think that they wouldn't come to the wedding would be b/c they are embarassed for backing out of the RD? Who knows...