Many peope in FI's family have gotten married recently and they have gone the cheaper route with everything like fake flowers, no video, no limo etc.
I was talking to his family the other day about how much we spent on the photograpaher and video package and they all made comments like 'Gee...you have expensive taste!'
I said 'Having nice pictures is important to me'
Then after I got home I found out that they were all asking if we were getting help to pay for our wedding. They were commenting on our reception hall and how it is so expensive and that we should have gone here and there...blah blah.... They have no idea what package we have!
I am furoius! We are paying for this 99% ourselves. My mom bought my dress and FI;s parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner.
If I didn't make fun of them for going the cheaper route, why are you making fun of me for wanting to make my wedding nice?
I am working two jobs to pay fo this and I am very proud of what we have accomplished!
Anyone else experience this?
njbound07
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Re: Need to vent about FI's family re: money we spend
that's why I keep my wedding planning and how much we're spending to ourselves...
When I told my mom how much our reception is costing.. she said 'Chrissy why do you have to spend so much $xx,xxx is so much money' I said to her mom.. this is one day for me that I will remember for the rest of my life... so please don't tell me not to spend too much... thanks!
anybody asks oh how much are you spending for photo and flowers... my response is ummm... a lot of money... so much that I don't wanna talk about it. besides it's rude to ask someone how much you're spending on anything wedding related.
you think b/c it's family that's it's ok to tell them b/c you trust them... but still there are times that you hear flack about your wedding.
Blondie77
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Re: Need to vent about FI's family re: money we spend
My fiancee actually asked me NOT to talk about the cost of anything with his family because they would be appalled since they are not from NY and not used to big weddings. This really annoyed me since I think I spent a lot of time searching for a really great deal on a RH (we are paying for almost everything ourselves) ..... I was saying to my married friends will I always have to be secretive w/ FH's family about how much I spend on things?
They were like - of course....LMAO! They told me to think about it like bootcamp for ignoring the unsolicited comments I will receive for the rest of my life...Oh well - FH is worth it. But yes I totally hear you - why does everybody care how much we spend on things......if they aren't paying?
MrsBrags7706
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Re: Need to vent about FI's family re: money we spend
When it comes to the food [The hall], the entertainment [the DJ/band] and the Photography - you CANNOT scrimp!!!!!!!
My photographer was alot of $ too and so was the package we chose, and my mom paid for the whole wedding, so when my DH told his mother how much MY mother was spending on photography my FMIL FREAKED! i blantanly told her its not HER money and, having a top-notch photographer, as well as DJ, hall, etc, etc, etc is important to me!!!!! My In-laws never like to spend money so thats why they had to make alllll these comments about it when they were paying for almost nothing!
I would tell your future in laws that this is YOUR wedding and you will spend the $ how you want. I would do it in a respectful way of course. I would also NOT tell her the $ amount of each vendor and what you're paying! If she's not helping you, she doesn't need to know!
Regal Beagle
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Re: Need to vent about FI's family re: money we spend
I have avoided discussing prices at all costs, but it slipped out. It doesn't matter though because my mother in law to be made a comment when we first booked our hall to the whole family. We weren't there, but I was told later.
It was something like 'they are crazy'. I felt so hurt and not supported. Meanwhile if I had fake flowers or no video she would say that we weren't doing the right thing.
