Need to Vent sorry alil long

susanafernandes82 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 11:36 AM

Need to Vent sorry alil long

So my futrue MOIL has been a pain in my a$$ about inviting all of her friends to our wedding. Now I dont have a problem with this but she wanted to invite 25 people which is crazy. Me and my FH are paying for this wedding all by ourselves so we have want people we know and who know us there. She is not helping with anything or even offering to help with anything. So I told her that is was only allowed to invite 3 couples and she gave me such ish about it that she cant just invite those people and not others blah blah telling that they have money and will get nice checks (which i dont care about the money) i just dont want strangers at our wedding and she told thier not strangers thier with friends she works with. So I sen out the invites last week and she called me up saying that 2 couple arent going to make it and if icould send out 2 others. I told i had no more invites (which is a lie i had like 5 extra but I wanted to keep 2 for me and the others if someone didnt get mailed out right or whatever) she lost it telling me that she already told these people that thier invite and they think thier coming blah blah. I told Im sorry and that she shouldnt have gonna around like a promoter promoting my wedding and inviting people i didnt know. So she hung up on me and like a day later my FSIL called me asking why my FMIL wanted her invite. I told her dont give it to her. I called my FMIL and she told me that she re-mailed her invite to her friend and was going to remail my FSIL to another friend. I totally freak and was screaming that that wasnt right and she shouldnt have done that and they are not invited and now she has to dis invite them. Then she told me that they are important people and can not be disinvited. Can you believe this. My FH is no help because he dislike his mom anyway so the less communication he has with her the better for him. Can we put all the mean FMIL in a boat and ship them to an island somewhere

Junebride2010 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 11:40 AM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

OMG--she has alot of nerve!!!!

sophisticat13 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 11:46 AM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Sorry you are going through this...
can you just tell her that you are paying for everything yourselves, cannot afford to invite all her friends, especially ppl you never met, and that it's YOUR wedding? She needs a dose of reality!!...also another thought, try to get your FH more involved...the reason I'm saying this is because right now your dealings with your inlaws are forming a pattern of your relationships with them...and you don't want to be the one who always deals with his mother...not fair to you

gonzalezm3 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 11:52 AM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

first of all, since you and FH are paying for the wedding - you should have total say in who is invited or not. IF she wants to invite all these people, tell her that she is responsible for paying per person on who she wants to invite extra!!!!! I'd even have your FH to talk to his mom about all of this!!! the situation is crazzyy

dmcd19 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 11:55 AM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Since you and FH are paying for it, she should have nothing to say..period

FutureMrsSoltan Posted: Jul 02, 2009 11:56 AM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

WOW THAT IS VERY BALLSY !!

jcreilly Posted: Jul 02, 2009 11:58 AM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

OMG I am so sorry what a witch

susanafernandes82 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:00 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

SHE KNOWS THAT WERE PAYING FOR THE WEDDING. SHE DOESNT CARE. ITS ALL A SOCIAL STATUS FOR HER. SHE THINKS ITS HER WEDDING AND SHE NEEDS TO BE THE SPOT LIGHT AT IT. SHE DID THE SAME THING AT OUR EPARTY. SHE WANTED TO BE ANNOUNCED AT THE EPARTY WHEN SHE WALKED IN. ME AND MY FH WERENT EVEN BEING ANNOUNCED. SHE SICK IN THE HEAD. IT ALL ABOUT APPEREANCES FOR FOR. SHE HAS TO LOOK BETTER THEN MY MOM BETTER THEN THE BM'S BETTER THEN ANYONE. ITS SICK.

KerriJohnS Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:04 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Posted by susanafernandes82

SHE KNOWS THAT WERE PAYING FOR THE WEDDING. SHE DOESNT CARE. ITS ALL A SOCIAL STATUS FOR HER. SHE THINKS ITS HER WEDDING AND SHE NEEDS TO BE THE SPOT LIGHT AT IT. SHE DID THE SAME THING AT OUR EPARTY. SHE WANTED TO BE ANNOUNCED AT THE EPARTY WHEN SHE WALKED IN. ME AND MY FH WERENT EVEN BEING ANNOUNCED. SHE SICK IN THE HEAD. IT ALL ABOUT APPEREANCES FOR FOR. SHE HAS TO LOOK BETTER THEN MY MOM BETTER THEN THE BM'S BETTER THEN ANYONE. ITS SICK.

Eeek! This sound AWFUL!! She's a total momzilla!!!!

las1 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:08 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Sorry you are going through this. It is not fair since you and your FH are paying. If she wants to invite more people she should pay for them.

StaceyWill Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:09 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Posted by bunny032002

OMG--she has alot of nerve!!!!

ITA!!!

Michy2009 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:13 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

ewww..sorry, that *****. She does have alot of nerve cause it isnt like she is contributing to the cost of the wedding, so she is lucky you are even letting her invite any of her friends.

Sorry I dont have any advice to lend....you have my sympathy..at least your fh seems to be on your side.

ourwedding9510 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:15 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

I'm sorry you have to go through this and I'm sorry I'm about to say what I'm about to say but drastic times call for drastic measures. Disinvite your MIL! Tell her that if she insists on inviting these people then she will have to give up her seat and you will make sure that the RH will not let her in the building. She will have no other choice but to give up on the other couple. My FH's cousins are starting with us about not inviting kids (we made it 18 and over to attend) and I simple told her 'then we will miss you at the wedding if you seem to think that that is more important then seeing your cousin get married.' Sometimes it stinks but you have to put people in their place and give them options (to your advantage)! It may seem Bridezilla to people on the outside but you have to do what you have to do and ANYONE would FLIP out on a MIL like that so do whatever you have to do!

geegee827 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:19 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Here's what we did with my mom and FILs. They each got one table of 10 people. If they went over that table, they had to pay for anyone over 10. Invitations haven't gone out yet, but I have both of their guests lists. Neither one of them went over (yet), but they know if they do, they have to pay.

rdubs Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:21 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Its a very difficult situation you are in. We are having some trouble with that too but FILs have agreed to put extra money in. Your FMIL should really be doing the same.

Good luck and I'm so sorry you have the deal with this.

LadyC23 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:22 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

First off, sorry you are going through this. I would flip the f*** out! She has some nerves. She has no respect for you or your FH. She is not paying for anything so she should not have any say. You and your FH need to tell her that it is your wedding not hers and if she can't respect you and your FH's wishes, she should not come at all. JMO.

pa56 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:24 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

My advice is you've already told this woman no and she won't listen. I would NOT accommodate her. Don't make a placecard for her uninvited guests or seat them anywhere. She will have to deal with them at the reception, not you. If she wants to give away her seat to her friend, then there's not much you can do. Let her do it and look like a fool.

Since your FH is on your side, you have nothing more to lose by stooping to her level.

MrsCM Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:30 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

Tell her she can invite whomever she wants so long as she covers their plates.

runnerbride1023 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:32 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

That is horrible! What a horrible horrible woman! You should have a serious conversation with this woman and tell her that a- you can not afford (even if you can, lie) to invite all of these people that she already invited and now either she has to pay for them, or b-you will call each one personally and tell them they are no longer invited to the wedding.

(OK maybe I am a bit over-dramatic here, but still she s u c k s!)

Can you lie and say that they will not fit in the room at the RH? I thought I had it rough, but clearly my FMIL is a saint compared to this one.

It is your wedding, and if FH does not like her, then you do not have to either!

queensbride2010 Posted: Jul 02, 2009 12:40 PM

Re: Need to Vent sorry alil long

The nerve of her to do that! You should tell her to cover their plates or else they won't be allowed in and she will have to deal with it when her guests are left outside. Unfortunately, it seems like she is a hard head and still will try to get over.

Hopefully things get better.