newlywed MONEY advice

please make sure that once you and your FH are married..that it is just you and him that he or you worry about

nobody else

DH thinks that he can save the whole world and not think we will suffer because of it..he thinks because he is making a bit of money now that he can pay the way for everyone else

he brags to people how much he makes and now people are calling all the time saying 'my phone got shut off..let me borrow money'

its complete and utter BS

and DH is a freaking superhero and friggin pays for this stuff

im over it

moral of the story his dad ( who has been borrowing a lot of my from us and we paid for his WHOLE stay in NY while we were getting married there )

is still askig to borrow money

he is moving in with us and we got a house that was affordable and to accomodate him and im freaking out that we arent going to be able to tell him no and we are going to have to change our life because of the money his father nmight have to borrow

vent over

I had a similar thing happen to me but I am just doing what you said- worrying about DH and I.

My BIL called me and told me that he needed to pay his bowling dues but didn't want to ask DH for the money to borrow but instead wanted to borrow it from me since he knows that we got $$ from the wedding.. I told him flat out no and that the $$ from the wedding is just for DH and I.

A friend of mine also called asking to borrow money to cover a bill she 'forgot' to pay and didn't have the cash for it... ugh some people!!

I'm sorry that people now expect you 2 to fork over money to help, that really *****. But I hope you 2 are being responsible with your money while giving some away! Make sure you've got a 6 month emergency savings fund that has enough $$ in it to pay for all your mortgage, bills, living costs. God forbid your DH gets laid off in this awful economy, you might find yourselves asking for hand outs instead. So the next time DH brags about his $ and shells $ out for others, ask each other if you two would be able to help yourselves if something were to happen. I learned all this from Suze Orman

hopefully once your FIL lives with you two you can set up some boundaries. you 2 should have a plan about how much you're willing to give him on a monthly basis so that the two of you don't fight over it

nobody except for my mom knows what we got for the wedding..but we did let DH family know that boxed gifts arent as traditional in NY as envelopes

so they know we got a lot of cash..just not how much

its just crazy what people do

and we have plenty in savings..but thats a no touch zone..and DH looks at both our accounts and thinks thats what we have total..he tells me to look at them as 1 big account

im gonna kill him..i promise

Ok from now on tell him to say that he is broke instead of how muc he makes

i know it must be hard for him to say no bc its family but he also cant be taken advantage of. So as long as thats not happening and the money is really needed by these people and you have enough in savings you should be ok right now but he has to stop that soon haha. But its very nice of him

---

Posted by Espo22

Ok from now on tell him to say that he is broke instead of how muc he makes

i know it must be hard for him to say no bc its family but he also cant be taken advantage of. So as long as thats not happening and the money is really needed by these people and you have enough in savings you should be ok right now but he has to stop that soon haha. But its very nice of him

---

i know..im just going to spend money that he thinks we have

then he'll see what its like

im thinking im going to buy him this t-shirt

---

Posted by failurebydsign

---

Posted by Espo22

Ok from now on tell him to say that he is broke instead of how muc he makes

i know it must be hard for him to say no bc its family but he also cant be taken advantage of. So as long as thats not happening and the money is really needed by these people and you have enough in savings you should be ok right now but he has to stop that soon haha. But its very nice of him

---

i know..im just going to spend money that he thinks we have

then he'll see what its like

im thinking im going to buy him this t-shirt

---

thats what my fh does, he shops all the D*MN time so if ppl ask for money he cant give bc it has to go to his shopping well hes been doing well for a few months now. I had to talk to him and help him stop, it was an addiction lol

great t-shirt