NWR: Friendship problem... I am so sad...

A long time friend and I drifted apart... and today we were text messaging each other, and she just said somehting so cold to me... We have been on and off lately - long story, but I can't believe how she behaved towards me.

Instead of keeping up a tense friendship, I pretty much told her what I am feeling, and told her I am so sad and feel we have a half a friendship... she TMd me becak 'Whatever you feel you want to do!'

I just TMd her asking her why she is being so cold to me - it has never been this way... We were friends in college, lived on the same dorm floor. We were roomates after college. We have been thru everything together. She was recently cheated on by her lover of 2 years, and I stayed on the phone with her for hours everyday to help her through it.

Now, she is with a woman who is cheating on her partner with her, and the whole mess began when I asked her why she would feel comfortable doing that to someone else after all the pain she felt from it happening to her. But - in the past, we were ALWAYS able to say anything to each other - and she has done and said some very upsetting things to me, and I never treated her this way...

So, anyway, that is when the coldness began, but I still tried to be there for her. But she said some things to me that I just cannot handle - things you don't say to a friend...


anyway - I am done. I can't talk to her anymore...


sorry - I think I'm rambling, but I'm so upset....

Maybe you should rethink your friendship with her. You don't need any negative things in your life right now. I know it's hard, especially since you've been friends for a while, BUT you have a new family to depend on and take care of. Concentrate on them, and if she truly is your friend she'll come around and if not, good riddons!!!!

It's difficult when friends fall out of sorts with each other. As cliche as it sounds, it may be for the best. If she is not willing to take the time and effort it takes to keep her end of the friendship going, then what is your incentive for doing so on your end? I know your hurting but maybe you'll be better off in the long-run to just appreciate the friendship for what it was and then move on. You cannot let someone else's situations keep you down, especially if they do not want to reach out for the support they obviously need.

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Posted by MrsFelix



Maybe you should rethink your friendship with her. You don't need any negative things in your life right now. I know it's hard, especially since you've been friends for a while, BUT you have a new family to depend on and take care of. Concentrate on them, and if she truly is your friend she'll come around and if not, good riddons!!!!

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thanks - its other things too - we used to live in Brooklyn together with some other friends. We had a falling out with the friends (this was about 10 yrs ago) that really was because of her. We had to move back with parents for a while - she lived upstate and I moved to LI to live with my dad. I would always visit her upstate - she continued to live upstate up til 3 years ago... But she never visited me here because she 'hates ' LI. She has never been here....

She told me once she was going to visit me when I lived in Vermont,. I suggested going camping because I love it, and my ex never would go. She got offended and said I didn't want her in my house... and she never came - we didnt talk for a while after that...

She never met my ex and we were together for almost 6 years... she once told me he sounds like a loser...

Anytime we hang out - we meet in the city (she lives in Bklyn again) - she still never comes to see me in LI - and whines that I have never seen her apt!!!


She still refers to my FH's daughters as 'those kids ' (she never met them) and when I told her their names, she's like - whatever - I'm never going to remember them... I know she's gay and is never going to have kids and doesn't care for kids, but if she cared for me, she would make an effort - I knew every single one of her cat's names and ailments... When I reached out to her because I was having trouble with one of the girls - she just responded by saying kids are 'evil.'

She has always seemed to call the shots in our friendship, and I always let her - I never even realized it until I sat and really looked at some of the things she has done and said to me in my life...

And even now - I tried to TM her and say - this isn't like you - why are you being so cold to me?

She said this is her... and I said - no, you are better than this - she said - this is my best side...

I TMd her and said your best side never treated me this way... than i turned off the phone so I couldnt respond to any of her TM...

We TM because she is always at work (she waitresses)

Anyway - I am venting again...