NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

darly Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:29 PM

NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

Hi all
Just wondering what is protocol...I have never had to do this before.
May possibly have a job that I really would like.
The problem is that they trade show I would be working on is the same week as my wedding. I would be able to prep, sell whatever they want me to do except go to the show.
I haven't booked a HM yet and am waiting until I get the offer to tell them about my wedding.
My recruiter friend told me to wait until they offer me the job to negotiate time off - I only want if at all the week after the wedding. No long extended HM.
They didn't ask me directly if I was available on that date & haven't told the HR lady anything yet. Waiting until they offer it to me to do anything BUT my mom told me to think about moving the date up 1 week or something like that.
Anyone have a similar situation or have any advice??
I wore the ring to the interviews (I had 4 with them).
HELP!!

dkwife Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:31 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

I agree with your recruiter friend... I am a recruiter as well and once they offer you the position, it may be hard for them to say no about pushing the start date up. if you tell them before they even make you the offer, they may reconsider and offer it to the person who is 2nd in line... that is my thought, I would wait.

memyselfandi Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:32 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

i would stick to the advice of your recruiter friend - wait until you have been offered the position and then discuss it

darly Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:36 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

I will wait b/c that's exactly what he said
He said once they offer you the job, they won't reneg plus, I didn't lie to them, they didn't ask me if I was available that week.

They did tell me that the show that week was a less attended show (about 50%).

I guess then I can tell them that I feel it's a great fit and all that but we have to discuss the fact that I have planned my wedding for 9/12 and cannot attend the show, but can do all the planning, etc. and support for that show.
I am just worried b/c it would be my 1st trade show w/ them.

memyselfandi Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:39 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

thats a tough one - but hell if you are a good candidate for the position . . your services will be much appreciated at all the trade shows that you will be able to attend - GOOD LUCK

suven Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:43 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

If they do not ask if you can work on that day, you should not volunteer any information. You will most likely lose this opportunity if you volunteer the fact that you can't work on that day.

jennyhet Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:44 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

I agree with everone--don't negotiate time off until after the offer. If they really want you at the company (and it sure sounds like they do after 4 interviews), it will not matter.

darly Posted: Jun 17, 2004 02:46 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

ohmigod
i am an isane nervous wreck
i have been out of work for 18 mos
after getting laid off b/c my fh got another job (we worked together) at the competitor
they basically 'downsized' but fired me b/c conflict of interest
and having back surgery i would like this opportunity for sure

thanks so much for all the advice
i know i will lose if i offer it up
that's why i have said nothing yet - will wait until they offer it

you guys rock
my parents are trying to advise me but they never even sent resumes back in their day!!

lorsin Posted: Jun 17, 2004 03:29 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

I'm an HR Manager and I have a slightly different take.

If they have knowingly told you that they have a show on that week during the interviews, then they are setting up an expectation that you will be there. If they find out after they hire you that you already had your wedding booked that week and you didn't tell them, I think there will be bad blood.

I would rather have an employee be honest with me up front. If the candidate is good enough, I would hire them anyway. If they are okay with the time off and hire you anyway, you will know that they respect your personal life as well as your professional one. If they don't hire you because of a couple of weeks, then they probably aren't a company you want to work for anyway.

Just my opinion - do what your instincts tell you to do. Good luck!!

DjPiLL Posted: Jun 17, 2004 03:44 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

The recruiter wants his commission so he will have you do whatever he feels is necessary for you to land the job.

If he feels you should wait till after the offer to make them known of your wedding date... do that.

Remember... the part of the whole 'job acceptance offer' is a possible 'counter-offer'. A lot of job hunters don't always take the job's first offer.

If they offer you the job... nicely say... 'Thank you for this offer. The salary is very fair. I would like to work for your company, would you please allow me to start on xx/xx/xxxx.' If they ask why, simply say you are getting married that week, and I am sure they will take care of you.

darly Posted: Jun 17, 2004 04:02 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

Actually I got this on my own
The recruiter is a friend just giving my his opinion.

Actually I can start on Monday
I am ready to go
This time off I need isn't until September.
The Monday after my wedding off or even the whole week if I can get it.
The show is that week
I can start right away...so that 's why I didn't say anything b/c they didn't tell me the dates yet and the woman I am replacing is out on maternity leave
She may be back by then and then I will go with another team to work on another trade show...

cocoa Posted: Jun 17, 2004 04:07 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

Darly, good luck and i hope to soon wish you congratulations, but i'm with everyone else...wait to tell them. chances are they saw the ring and they would be understanding...it's not like you have plans to go to the jersey shore or something, you know? these are biiiiiig plans and i would think a potential employer would be understanding especially since you want to work for them and with them regarding this situation.

darly Posted: Jun 17, 2004 05:14 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

thanks everyone!
i am such a nervous wreck
it's all new to me!

samsbride Posted: Jun 17, 2004 06:13 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

ok - you are thinking about this the wrong way. They have a job they need to fill. If they offer it to you - it's because they think you will do it well and not because you will never have a personal conflict. I cannot imagine one event is a deal breaker.
In any case, you have to wait until you get the offer. If they are looking at several candidates and offer you the job - they will be more flexible at that point. If you tell them now and there is another candidate who is as good or almost as good - they'll take them.
I have been around the block a bit and I can tell you that you are in a little bit of a power position once they offer you the job. They don't want to start interviewing people again.
You are not allowed to feel guilty! This is a job and your wedding is an important day in your life. I can understand moving your honeymoon date a little if it helps but you need time to plan your wedding and missing the conference is not as big of a deal as your wedding!!! good luck

darly Posted: Jun 18, 2004 09:11 AM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

I know I am overthinking this WAY too much!
Thanks all!

newbrideOct Posted: Jun 18, 2004 09:37 AM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

Take the job! Start Monday! IMO tell them right after you accept. September is time enough for them to make other arrangements. A wedding is something everyone is happy about! You'll be there long enough for an office shower!

Good Luck!

darly Posted: Jun 18, 2004 09:47 AM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

you guys are so dead on it's scary
okay no more working stress
i thought it would deflect off the wedding stress

darly Posted: Jun 23, 2004 03:11 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE

still waiting to hear from the HR Manager

She called all my references but my big issue is telling her that I would like the week off
turns out Rosh Hashanah is that week too!!
so I wouldn't be working that afternoon b/c of the Jewish Holiday

As soon as I accept, I will tell her that I have my wedding booked.

darly Posted: Jun 28, 2004 04:47 PM

Re: NWR JOB SITUATION NEED ADVICE - UPDATED

I got the job! I just accepted! After 19 mos. of being out of work, I got the job & told the HR manager about the honeymoon - I told her I would like the week off and she said it wouldn't take away from the team I will be working with! The lady I am replacing will be back until the end of Sept. and doesn't think it'll be a problem - whoo hoo!