NWR.....Sorry its kind of long

Original post by woobie113007

Nov 25, 2006 08:14 PM

I never post anything personal on here...Just always about wedding stuff but I just have to I guess vent and see if there is anyone out there in the same boat as me.
Okay (this may be a little long and I apologize). FH and I bought a house together last year.....,we been in the house for 1year and 2 months already. Got engaged 2 months after we got the house. We were doing fine with bills and stuff and then we started booking wedding things and leaving a deposit here and there etc etc. FH takes a pay cut at work to become a Steam Fitter (not quite sure what that is but hes now in the Union and after 5 years they make like $45 an hour or something). He works OT occasionally so that makes his check what he used to take home. Okay fine.......So Im paying bills today and I have a major breakdown. I was writing with a pencil and I got so frustrated with all these bills that are on the desk, I slammed it and it broke. The I started to cry. FH came in and I was like whats the matter....So I tell him nothing and hes like oh you just break pencils and cry for no reason. So I showed him the stack of bills and the amount of money in out Accounts. I think the only bill I pay the entire amount is the Mortgage (and the smaller bills like phone, cable etc)
He sits next to me and tells me not to stress over the $$ situation and that we're okay....blah blah blah. He said that he'll go into his 401K in december (he took out some $$ for the house and is done paying it off then so we can take out a loan again) and pay off all the bills and then put the rest in a seperate account for wedding or emergencies. I have to say that 80% of the bills are like 'house' things...Home Depot, Lowes, and then Misc things like Furnature and this and that.

If there is anyone out there in a similar situation can you let me know (or FM me). I think I might need someone to 'vent' to from time to time (as a counseling type thing)

Thanks for the time and sorry again it was so long

sarahradio5 Posted: Nov 26, 2006 05:52 PM

Re: NWR.....Sorry its kind of long

Don't worry... it will feel better after the wedding.

The main thing is that you and your FH did what me and my now-DH did... and that's buy the house first. Usually, you have all that money to put into the wedding and then the money you get from the wedding goes towards a down payment on the house. When you buy the house before the wedding, things are different and the pressure is on. BUT, AFTER the wedding, all your gifts can go towards the bills you have to pay - and you know you don't also need to save for a house, so you'll be better off then. Before my wedding, I was paying the minimum on everything. Over this weekend, I paid off a few cards and took big chunks out of others. It felt sooooo good... and after your wedding is over, you'll get that feeling, too!

In the meantime, the fact that you and your FH are a TEAM is important, and if that pay hits in 5 years, you'll be even BETTER off! (my FH also took a slight pay cut by getting a better job this year, with the promise that the LONG-TERM will be MUCH better, so we're in a pretty similar boat as each other!)

xcoleyx18 Posted: Nov 26, 2006 06:59 PM

Re: NWR.....Sorry its kind of long

I am def in a similar situation. I take care of most of the mtg and the little bills which wasnt really a problem until I got a 20k paycut! but I have been managing to pay it with my FH's help. We moved in almost exactly a year and a half ago ..My FH actually changed careers 6 months after we moved in so it was very stressful for a little bit.. anyway my point is it sounds like your FH is bettering himself and your relationship in the long run..Im def stressing about money now especially since its holiday time but everytime I stress I realize that we have a house making it by we both are happy and things in the long run will all work out!