Official 08 married brides advice to future brides thread

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Posted by Mimacat

Here's a weird worry I have - the bathroom!! How did that workout for you girls? Did someone have to come?

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My dress was not a corset, so whenever I had to pee, I had DH come into the bridal suite and unzip me and I just took the dress off!

the brides just needs to have hair and makeup done before photog's get there unless your taking getting ready shots with them which you should have informed them.

I had to wait to put my dress on so they could take dress shots first - then i got dressed then they came back and took the rest.

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Posted by nifheim

the brides just needs to have hair and makeup done before photog's get there unless your taking getting ready shots with them which you should have informed them.

I had to wait to put my dress on so they could take dress shots first - then i got dressed then they came back and took the rest.

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ok thanks...ew, i just dont want them taking pics of me without my makeup on, lol! maybe i will try to be ready or at least getting my makeup done by the time they get there.

also, who did you gift your photo checklist to? i want to split mine up amongst the bridesmaids, but i dont want to make them have to carry around paper with them. Maybe if they have purses they can put it in there? i feel bad putting that resposibility on them but i wouldnt know who else to give it to

Don't try to make everyone happy. It will drive you insane, especially when it comes to divorced people. They will run a long list of who they can't sit with. Just nod yes and work it out on your own. Never let them see the seating chart!

Kill FMIL while you still have time.

Enjoy the planning as much as you can and don't melt down over small things. It's not worth the headaches or wasting the xanex.

pre wedding -- if you are unsure as to wether you should have someone at your wedding or in your bridal party etc listen to yourself...if you keep feeling like you shouldnt there are probaly good reasons.
talk to your vedors . dont ever be afraid to voice a concern or discuss an issue they arent mind readers and dont know you well enough to know everything you want or dont want. I was nervous with vendors not wanting to annoy them but in the end they were all wonderful .

Have a close friend or family who kn ows exactly how you want everything to happen and what pics you want etc ....I would def reccomed spending the money on a DOC to do this so a guest doesnt lose time / etc ...I would highly reccomend mine
http://www.aboveandbeyondli.com/
she made everything go perfectly was with me through hair and make up through getting us in the limo at the end of the night ....she does everything ,,,,Helped me in the bathroom...helped me change my shoes kept up with my lip gloss....she is absolutely the best!


During your ceremony ignore everyone around you pay 100% attention to your FH ...Alot of my favorite memories are of the looks on his face throught our ceremony

hold hands and hug as often as possible even if its 5 minutes get a few minutes alone to take in the night together...kiss often laugh alot and most of all rember you arent a hostess you are a bride you are entitled to enjoy ...dance talk eat drink and enjoy....all the stress now makes it all worth it that day...relax and remeber all the effort you put in ...to make it perfect and have faith in that....Do not stress that day relax enjoy and rember people are going to be there to help you ...try to do as little as possible your self !!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by Mimacat

OMG I think I'm just gonna have to hold it.

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I was thinking the same thing!!!

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Posted by Ilovebriani

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Posted by Mizzdimple

More:

If you have a bridal party from hell you may want to go OUT and get ur hair done, you may not want them there early all day in your house getting ready., they may get to you and make you miserable.

Dont drink before church (like all day) I was drinking all day and I think the alcohol made my feelings mulitply and I was kinda freakin out when I got to the church from my nerves

Im also very glad I had my kiddies there., although it wasnt a thought not to have them there.

Try to be early., when the photographer came, my hair was set in curlers and my sister was not even made up yet., and they were like um...you both need to be ready. Tell your hair lady they photographers will be there a bit early then they actually are.

It is truly about you and FH., Many couples try to 'Please everyone' but the wedding should reflect you and FH., all of my guests were not greek., but when the greek music came on they loved it, it was like a show to them, some even joined in the dancing..it reflects on the both of you.
And vice versa for the american and spanish music!

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i didnt even think about not being ready yet when the photog comes....what if we have them take still life pics when they get there? my photog. is coming at 7:45, we are supposed to be ready by 8:30, do u think that will be a probkem? plus, dont they take some pics of you getting ready?

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TRUE yea then just make sure photographer is early....

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Posted by kellybean

pre wedding -- if you are unsure as to wether you should have someone at your wedding or in your bridal party etc listen to yourself...if you keep feeling like you shouldnt there are probaly good reasons.
talk to your vedors . dont ever be afraid to voice a concern or discuss an issue they arent mind readers and dont know you well enough to know everything you want or dont want. I was nervous with vendors not wanting to annoy them but in the end they were all wonderful .

Have a close friend or family who kn ows exactly how you want everything to happen and what pics you want etc ....I would def reccomed spending the money on a DOC to do this so a guest doesnt lose time / etc ...I would highly reccomend mine
http://www.aboveandbeyondli.com/
she made everything go perfectly was with me through hair and make up through getting us in the limo at the end of the night ....she does everything ,,,,Helped me in the bathroom...helped me change my shoes kept up with my lip gloss....she is absolutely the best!


During your ceremony ignore everyone around you pay 100% attention to your FH ...Alot of my favorite memories are of the looks on his face throught our ceremony

hold hands and hug as often as possible even if its 5 minutes get a few minutes alone to take in the night together...kiss often laugh alot and most of all rember you arent a hostess you are a bride you are entitled to enjoy ...dance talk eat drink and enjoy....all the stress now makes it all worth it that day...relax and remeber all the effort you put in ...to make it perfect and have faith in that....Do not stress that day relax enjoy and rember people are going to be there to help you ...try to do as little as possible your self !!!!!!!!!!!!!

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cANT AGREE WITH THIS MORE..


During your ceremony ignore everyone around you pay 100% attention to your FH ...Alot of my favorite memories are of the looks on his face throught our ceremony

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Posted by Julybride08

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Posted by cbcf

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Posted by ant n tilde

From the moment you wake up on your wedding day you have a CHOICE as to what kind of bride you will be. You can be the bride that cried when her flowers were late, the bride that screamed at her mother, the bride who hyperventilated into a paper bag *OR* you can be the bride that everyone remembers as smiling, happy and calm.

Even with my anxiety disorder I was the happiest and calmest I have ever been. I made a DECISION to do that. Someone pranked my house non stop the night before my wedding beginning at 2AM. Normally I would have cried and it would have ruined everything. Instead, I took the phone off the hook and totally forgot about it.

I went to bed early, woke up when I felt like it and then took an hour long shower. Don't worry - your hair and makeup people will know when to fit you in so TAKE YOUR TIME. Let your vendors take care of everything. I was a guest at my own wedding and I did not do a thing once I stepped foot in my hall.

Enjoy yourself, look at your husband a million times and squeeze his hand. Smile. Dance with just him no matter who tries to pull you away. Get down on the floor and dance with the babies. Do a shot with your girls. Sit with the older people in your family and make sure they know you are happy they came.

In the end all you have is memories so make sure they are beautiful ones. No one will remember if your flowers were wrong BUT they will remember if you freaked out about it.

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Tilde that was wonderful advice and you almost had me sitting here crying at my desk just thinking about my day when it finally comes!!! thank you!!!!

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I almost cried too!! it's great advice!!

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I also almost cried when I read that.. it's so true!

The first funny thing I have to say is definitley use the bathroom before you get into your wedding gown.

Ok enough funny stuff...seriously ..Just let the day flow is my best advice- also don't let anything get in the way of having a great and special day.
I didn't lift a finger the day of my wedding and I let the vendors do all the work.. they did an awesome job and I had no worries at all!

Just start to enjoy the rest of your life with your DH!

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Posted by ant n tilde

From the moment you wake up on your wedding day you have a CHOICE as to what kind of bride you will be. You can be the bride that cried when her flowers were late, the bride that screamed at her mother, the bride who hyperventilated into a paper bag *OR* you can be the bride that everyone remembers as smiling, happy and calm.

Even with my anxiety disorder I was the happiest and calmest I have ever been. I made a DECISION to do that. Someone pranked my house non stop the night before my wedding beginning at 2AM. Normally I would have cried and it would have ruined everything. Instead, I took the phone off the hook and totally forgot about it.

I went to bed early, woke up when I felt like it and then took an hour long shower. Don't worry - your hair and makeup people will know when to fit you in so TAKE YOUR TIME. Let your vendors take care of everything. I was a guest at my own wedding and I did not do a thing once I stepped foot in my hall.

Enjoy yourself, look at your husband a million times and squeeze his hand. Smile. Dance with just him no matter who tries to pull you away. Get down on the floor and dance with the babies. Do a shot with your girls. Sit with the older people in your family and make sure they know you are happy they came.

In the end all you have is memories so make sure they are beautiful ones. No one will remember if your flowers were wrong BUT they will remember if you freaked out about it.

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Wow, that is some GREAT advice. I hope i can be calm that day. I tend to get anxious over little things, so I'm worried about this big day....but hopefully after reading your advice, I will be ok

Thank you!

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Posted by Mizzdimple

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Posted by kellybean

pre wedding -- if you are unsure as to wether you should have someone at your wedding or in your bridal party etc listen to yourself...if you keep feeling like you shouldnt there are probaly good reasons.
talk to your vedors . dont ever be afraid to voice a concern or discuss an issue they arent mind readers and dont know you well enough to know everything you want or dont want. I was nervous with vendors not wanting to annoy them but in the end they were all wonderful .

Have a close friend or family who kn ows exactly how you want everything to happen and what pics you want etc ....I would def reccomed spending the money on a DOC to do this so a guest doesnt lose time / etc ...I would highly reccomend mine
http://www.aboveandbeyondli.com/
she made everything go perfectly was with me through hair and make up through getting us in the limo at the end of the night ....she does everything ,,,,Helped me in the bathroom...helped me change my shoes kept up with my lip gloss....she is absolutely the best!


During your ceremony ignore everyone around you pay 100% attention to your FH ...Alot of my favorite memories are of the looks on his face throught our ceremony

hold hands and hug as often as possible even if its 5 minutes get a few minutes alone to take in the night together...kiss often laugh alot and most of all rember you arent a hostess you are a bride you are entitled to enjoy ...dance talk eat drink and enjoy....all the stress now makes it all worth it that day...relax and remeber all the effort you put in ...to make it perfect and have faith in that....Do not stress that day relax enjoy and rember people are going to be there to help you ...try to do as little as possible your self !!!!!!!!!!!!!

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cANT AGREE WITH THIS MORE..


During your ceremony ignore everyone around you pay 100% attention to your FH ...Alot of my favorite memories are of the looks on his face throught our ceremony

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awww, how sweet!!

The #1 and most important piece of advice I have is to remember the wedding is for you and FH. Make everything as personal as you can. FH and I are totally low maintenance people. Even my simple (but elegant!) wedding was a little fancier than what we would have done if other factors didn't come into play. Someone even commented that 'this is like a high maintenance wedding for a low maintenance couple!!'. If we had our way, we would have done a simple tented wedding somewhere...catered BBQ/Clambake style. But with potentially 350 guests...and with a large portion of them being on the older side...the whole bathroom/ weather situation would have been a logistical nightmare.

But we didn't feel like we had to do crazy big centerpieces, or have a huge band and all these other extra things...not because we didn't like them or we think they're bad ideas...it just wasn't us. We just wanted a simple gathering of family and friends. So stay true to yourselves and try not to get caught up with the trends, etc.

2) Prioritize what's important to you in terms of vendors before you start to look around. it'll make things a lot easier. For us, the most important things were photography and making sure all our guests felt like it was a small intimate wedding. We splurged the most on our photographer.....and everything else was extremely budget wedding.

We had a winter daytime wedding...we used our friends as vendors whenever possible. our only 'true' vendors was our photog, flowers and hair/makeup people. Everything else was done by friends/family. That made things feel really personal for us.

We took what the average flower budget should be for a wedding our size...and cut it in half by using potted plants on the tables.

We used the other half of that budget to treat all our friends/family to an evening of bowling right after the wedding. We had about 60 people RSVP...but that night, there were almost 100 people that showed up to bowl, or just to hang out!!!! It was one of the best times of my life...and was totally worth skimping on the flowers for

3) Try to get as much info from your reception hall before the wedding about how things will run. We didn't do that and didn't realize that the maitre'd would pretty much run the show. I spend the entire day before trying to perfect the reception schedule...down to the minute. And the day of, everything went otu the window because everything basically depends on when the food is served. Find out what order they normally do things in...where you will go in between events, like ceremony, cocktail hour, reception.

4) Spend alone time with FH DURING the reception. FH and I refused to get up and do our meet and greets until the entree was served. So we had the appetizer and the salad course by ourselves at our own table. We had groups of people come over to say hi and stuff, which was fine...but the majority of the time was just us two...reflecting and taking in everything. It really is an overwhelming feeling to sit there and see EVERYONE who showed up to celebrate this with you.

5) don't forget the guests!!!! We visited every table and said hi to everyone and took pics. I must admit, it took a REALLY long time...over an hour to get through all the tables. It cut our dancing time at the end down from 2 hours to about 45 minutes. But we would have felt awful if we rushed through it or skipped tables. And honestly, after 45 miniutes, i was totally ready to sit down....i don't know what i was thinking with the 2 hours. hahahahaha. my feet HURT...and my legs were burning up underneath my dress...i kept having to hike it up to my knees.

6) Take your pics before the ceremony. That private first time when you see each other was soooo nice. I knew if i had done that in front of people, we would have held back. And anyway, after the ceremony, everything feels like it goes by so fast....you don't want to have to rush your pictures

7) Go to cocktail hour...even if it's just for a few minutes. We had to do a tea ceremony with our families after our actual ceremony, which took 30 minutes. We then spent 15 minutes alone just wolfing down cocktail hour food. And the last 15 minutes, we went down to say hi to everyone

8) Ignore your photographers/videographers. Aside from the portraits, i had no idea where my photographers were. Of coruse, they were there, but i wasn't consciously looking for them to make sure they got this shot or that shot. It makes it a nice surprise when you see your pics to see what they captured. Most of my preview pro pics were candids and I didn't even know i was being photographed. One of my fave preview pics is the one of me smelling my bouquet, taken from down the hall. I had no idea she was even standing there.

9) HAVE FUN!!!!!!

oh yeah...one last thing, i promise!

Enjoy the ceremony. I barely gave the ceremony a second thought since I had focused all my time on the reception. But I was pleasantly surprised to find myself thoroughly enjoying the ceremony. I felt like it was just FH and I in the room alone.

FH actually flubbed the vows a little. i KNEW he was going to because I know he has trouble memorizing a long string of words verbatim. Plus, he was nervous...so his very first line, he said like the first three words and kind of went...uhhhhh. And then towards the end, he kept saying things out of order, or inserting another word. It was hilarious. Everyone thought it was so charming!

I have a few things..People have said it but ill explain more I guess

**SEE EACHOTHER BEFORE ( if you don't have a break in between ceremony and Reception that is)
hubby was SO against doing this..He said that if we saw eachother before the ceremony all the impact of me walking down the aisle would be gone..But I said..Listen..We don't have time and we have to do it before..

After the ceremony I talked to him and he said that once we saw eachother earlier in the day it calmed him down and when he saw me walk down the aisle it still had the same feeling as if it was the first time he saw me all day

SO DO THIS you can enjoy your day..It goes b SO FAST

**do things that you wouldn't normally do
if you are a shy person who never dances at a party..You are going to be SO upset if you just sit there all night

I LITERALLY DANCED ALL NIGHT!!!
There was a time I danced to 2 whole songs all by myself..Nobody was there..I enjoyed my day SO much that nothing was going to stop me

**make sure you see everyone..Other brides said this..But all these people came here for you with gifts..They might not be totally happy if you never make it to their table and then just take their envelope and that's that..Even if its a quick thanks for coming..They will understand that you planned for this and want to enjoy yourself and get back to the dance floor

I actually called a lot of people the week after the wedding Incas I forgot to talk to anyone..I dint want them to think I was a bltch

** if there is something that you and or FH are totally into..Make sure you incorporate it in your wedding day
DH SMokes about 2 - 3 cigars a week and is extremely into the culture behind it..He spends all his spare money on it and its crazy..We have a humidor that holds 500 and its almost always half full at LEAST..Therefore..I got him a cigar roller..It was MONEY WELL SPENT..It was the cheapest of all my vendors and was the biggest hit..Everyone freaked out and that guy made a killing on tips
he talks about it EVERYDAY and how it was the best gift EVER

**do things your way...but Compromise a little

my mom was NOT INTO the fact that I was going to wear my 8 yr old converse sneakers on my wedding day..They are my shoes that I go everywhere in and are the most comfy..I was insistent on wearing them..IM not a frilly person and didn't want to get these wedding shoes that were never going to be worn again..SO that morning when we woke up she says with me..Listen..I really don't think you should wear those old sneakers..Will you at least get new ones and wear them..And I said OK..Cause we both got our way and IM happy I did it..My BM ran out to the south shore mall at like 11am to buy them..It made for fun that day as well

that's it for now..ill think of more

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