ok ANOTHER question about tipping...

i see a bunch of threads about people tiping their BM $3-$5 pp.

I planned on tiping our Maitre D about $3-5 pp (depending on how everything goes)

but, do i tip the BM AND the Maitre D?

Our BM booked us but I've talked to her maybe a total of 4 times? I really dont see a reason to tip her 450.00 when i haven't really asked her to go above and beyond...
(now the sales person at the HOTEL is another matter.... SHE deserves a good tip for all the help she's given.)

other tips we plan on is 100 for our main photog
50-75 for our photojournalist photog...

150 for the bridal attendant...

75 for the limo


anyone else
?

DJ is a good friend and we've hooked him up in other ways...lol

Personally, I believe that you tip well when the service justifies it...why should you tip someone who you only met a few times a sizable sum of money?

I heard some people tip the flower people, limo driver...not sure otherwise..Sorry!

A tip should not be a requirement in my eyes, it should be earned...do a great job get a great tip, do nothing, and you know...I agree with you and think you should do what you feel is right!

NO you do not tip your BM.
From what i have been told your BM is just the sales guy, they will check in on your affair thru out the night but in no way are they reallyinvolved in it.

HTH-we only tipped our maitre d

PErsonaly I feel 175 i alot for a bridal attendant...i dont think I really saw mine much once the reception started-we tipped I think 75 each (I had 2) all they did was bustle my dress-wrong...and hold my bok until the reception

for the hall we tipped:
the BM
bridal attendant
Maitre D
Two Captains

---

Posted by acsm

for the hall we tipped:
the BM
bridal attendant
Maitre D
Two Captains

---

yeah but HOW MUCH did you tip the BM?

I only spoke to mine, not even a handful of times...

Actually, I've heard you do NOT tip the BM **unless** you had a closer relationship to him/her where he/she went above and beyond with your wedding planning over the course of the year (or months) you planned.

Most people I believe do not tip the BM. If you've only spoken to him about 4 times, I would venture to say he hasn't gone above and beyond what his regular job is, so I would not tip at all.

The $3-5 guideline is for the Maitre'd by the way.

HTH!

no way did i tip my BM... only the matre'd

Bare with me here, kinda long response....

We met w/ our BM the other night, he is a friend of a friend, and he said we 'should' tip the Matre'D, the Bridal attendant and the chef?? We were like 'the chef' he said yes, it insures that he will go over and beyond to make sure that your food is superb.....he said for my Dad to go to him personally the weekend before our wedding and hand it to him directly, he said he does all of his ordering on Monday, so he will throw in extra stuff.

I never heard of this....do you think b/c he kinda knows us that he gave us this info on the down low??

---

Posted by futrmrsblt

no way did i tip my BM... only the matre'd

---

hey hall twin! thank you, thats good to know.
she was wonderful to us but I really didnt ask much of her...

---

Posted by Tobewed07

Bare with me here, kinda long response....

We met w/ our BM the other night, he is a friend of a friend, and he said we 'should' tip the Matre'D, the Bridal attendant and the chef?? We were like 'the chef' he said yes, it insures that he will go over and beyond to make sure that your food is superb.....he said for my Dad to go to him personally the weekend before our wedding and hand it to him directly, he said he does all of his ordering on Monday, so he will throw in extra stuff.

I never heard of this....do you think b/c he kinda knows us that he gave us this info on the down low??

---

wow, thats GOOD TO KNOW!

how much did he suggest you tip?

---

Posted by carolinep24

---

Posted by Tobewed07

Bare with me here, kinda long response....

We met w/ our BM the other night, he is a friend of a friend, and he said we 'should' tip the Matre'D, the Bridal attendant and the chef?? We were like 'the chef' he said yes, it insures that he will go over and beyond to make sure that your food is superb.....he said for my Dad to go to him personally the weekend before our wedding and hand it to him directly, he said he does all of his ordering on Monday, so he will throw in extra stuff.

I never heard of this....do you think b/c he kinda knows us that he gave us this info on the down low??

---

wow, thats GOOD TO KNOW!

how much did he suggest you tip?

---

he didn't give an exact amount, but my Dad said $400?? I think thats too much! LOL I say $200.

---

Posted by Tobewed07

Bare with me here, kinda long response....

We met w/ our BM the other night, he is a friend of a friend, and he said we 'should' tip the Matre'D, the Bridal attendant and the chef?? We were like 'the chef' he said yes, it insures that he will go over and beyond to make sure that your food is superb.....he said for my Dad to go to him personally the weekend before our wedding and hand it to him directly, he said he does all of his ordering on Monday, so he will throw in extra stuff.

I never heard of this....do you think b/c he kinda knows us that he gave us this info on the down low??

---

HUH?!?!?! Tip the chef so the food is superb?? Ummmm, the food is SUPPOSED to be superb. Ugh, I hate hearing things like this - it's like saying, well if you don't tip, your food won't be the best, so if you TAKE TIME OUT of your super busy schedule and come PERSONALLY to give the CHEF a tip then you can rest easy that he'll do a good job.

I don't think so!

---

Posted by MrsQ-in2007

---

Posted by Tobewed07

Bare with me here, kinda long response....

We met w/ our BM the other night, he is a friend of a friend, and he said we 'should' tip the Matre'D, the Bridal attendant and the chef?? We were like 'the chef' he said yes, it insures that he will go over and beyond to make sure that your food is superb.....he said for my Dad to go to him personally the weekend before our wedding and hand it to him directly, he said he does all of his ordering on Monday, so he will throw in extra stuff.

I never heard of this....do you think b/c he kinda knows us that he gave us this info on the down low??

---

HUH?!?!?! Tip the chef so the food is superb?? Ummmm, the food is SUPPOSED to be superb. Ugh, I hate hearing things like this - it's like saying, well if you don't tip, your food won't be the best, so if you TAKE TIME OUT of your super busy schedule and come PERSONALLY to give the CHEF a tip then you can rest easy that he'll do a good job.

I don't think so!

---

yeah, i kind of agree with this. The food should be impressive regardless. Id rather tip my MaitrD or Bridal attendant more b/c their doing more FOR us

---

Posted by MrsQ-in2007

---

Posted by Tobewed07

Bare with me here, kinda long response....

We met w/ our BM the other night, he is a friend of a friend, and he said we 'should' tip the Matre'D, the Bridal attendant and the chef?? We were like 'the chef' he said yes, it insures that he will go over and beyond to make sure that your food is superb.....he said for my Dad to go to him personally the weekend before our wedding and hand it to him directly, he said he does all of his ordering on Monday, so he will throw in extra stuff.

I never heard of this....do you think b/c he kinda knows us that he gave us this info on the down low??

---

HUH?!?!?! Tip the chef so the food is superb?? Ummmm, the food is SUPPOSED to be superb. Ugh, I hate hearing things like this - it's like saying, well if you don't tip, your food won't be the best, so if you TAKE TIME OUT of your super busy schedule and come PERSONALLY to give the CHEF a tip then you can rest easy that he'll do a good job.

I don't think so!

---

I agree and the food at our RH is amazing, that's why we picked it! LOL

I think our BM thinks that by tipping the chef he will throw in more stuff??

I'm an '08 bride crashing!

My FMIL kind of has a big mouth, or maybe I should say she has 'no filter.' Well, in this instance, it may have helped. She came with me to the Venetian Yacht Club when I toured it, and she flat out asked the BM about tipping. The BM said that you DON'T tip the BM, that you tip the MD $2-$3 per head, you tip the bridal attendant $125-$150 IF SHE WAS OUTSTANDING, and that as far as the hall is concerned, that's it. She also SUGGESTED tipping band/DJ members and the photographer about $50 per person. So, that's straight from the mouth of someone in the business, and I will probably follow that except I may tip my photog slightly more.

ETA: She didn't mention a valet or the coat check people, so I assume that they are covered by the 20% gratuity, but I'd ask my hall that question. If they said no, I'd probably throw those people money too.