OK...same question I had before and still stressing

lori7570 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 12:49 PM

OK...same question I had before and still stressing

So my e-party. Options are
1) my parents throwing it for us in a restaurant, inviting 20-30 people.
2) my parents giving us $1500.

If we went with option 2 we would want to have a BBQ that we would pay for, I'm guessing it would be around $500.

With FH recently getting laid off I'm wondering what we should do. I'm hoping if we have the party in a restaurant we will get cash gifts (I know I sound tacky).

I don't know what to do, the extra money will be helpful, but I also want to celebrate our engagement.

stinenandy2010 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 12:52 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

sorry to hear about your Fh! but if he is out of work right now, I would take the $1500 and not spend it, every little dollar helps. Then if he gets a job over the next few months, you can still have an eparty.

DnT2010 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 12:55 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

let your parents throw you the party.. it will be a lot of fun and you WILL get cash gifts... we did.. and we purposely didnt register for that reason.

we had a backyard e-party and it was WAYYYY more than $500

grkbarbie Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:01 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

yea xmas dinner at my house when i invite just 8-9 ppl costs me about 500$. take the 1500$.

you can always have the eparty in a few months. im not having an Eparty.. i think its askins guests to spend way too much money.. eparty,bridal shower, and wedding? i know i roll my eyes and get annoyed when brides have all 3.

is there any way you can cut down the list in half? and take them to a cheaper rest? or take them to brunch?

lori7570 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:14 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

This is really bumming me out I know it's smarter to just take the money, but I really wanted to have some sort of party. I guess I totally underestimated the cost of a backyard party, sounds like it will be closer to $750-$1000.

grkbarbie Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:16 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

and, ppl mite not give u $ or not as much if u have it in ur backyard.

MrsC2010 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:21 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

honestly, i say you go for the big party. you can always figure out a way to save more money later...but you only get one engagement. You may regret not having the party if its something you think you want.

grkbarbie Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:22 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

yea mrc also brings up a point......1500 wont make or break u either..

Jna2010 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:33 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

I would have your parents throw you the party... your not using any of your own money and youll get money from your guests, maybe it wont be 1500 or maybe itll be more!!

GonnaBeeMrsG Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:33 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

Posted by grkbarbie

yea xmas dinner at my house when i invite just 8-9 ppl costs me about 500$. take the 1500$.

you can always have the eparty in a few months. im not having an Eparty.. i think its askins guests to spend way too much money.. eparty,bridal shower, and wedding? i know i roll my eyes and get annoyed when brides have all 3.

is there any way you can cut down the list in half? and take them to a cheaper rest? or take them to brunch?

I really agree...thats why I am having an E party so me and fh can celebrate together with both families and I am not having a bridal shower. It really does get to be too much.

lori7570 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:38 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

I really do think I will regret it if we don't have a party. Re-reading my post I'm afraid I sound a little money hungry. This is about celebrating, not making money. Sorry if I sounded selfish, it's just that with the lay-off you tend to be money focused

I think I might just let me parents throw the party...it will be nice to have everyone in the same room finally

Thanks for the advice all

grkbarbie Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:46 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

we all think bout $.. ur not being money hungry..but i mean ***? no1 likes freeloaders either.. i know i never go anywhere empty handed...ESPECIALLY to an eparty..let alone a wedding!

stinenandy2010 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:51 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

i don't think you sounded selfish at all, its a tough decision bc on one hand you only get one engagement party but on the other hand you could use the money.....$1500 could be a deposit at your RH or the eparty that you dreamed of, its really your choice

lori7570 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 01:53 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

While I'll probably change my mind in a hour I think I'm going to let my parents throw me the party...I'm sure I'll update you soon

grkbarbie Posted: Jan 12, 2009 02:05 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

ur getting married 9/10.. when would u have ur epart? isnt it usually a yr or so b4 the wedding?

u have time. and im sure fh will find a job by then...

have the partyy

lori7570 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 02:12 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

Posted by grkbarbie

ur getting married 9/10.. when would u have ur epart? isnt it usually a yr or so b4 the wedding?

u have time. and im sure fh will find a job by then...

have the partyy

I'm going to have it in the summer....my sister said if I want the friends could go back to her house after and just hang out. I figured it would be warm enough to go outside and play beer pong

I really hope you're right about the job!! Thanks for the encouragement!!!

mikendeanna Posted: Jan 12, 2009 02:40 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

If I were you I would def do a small thing in a restaurant, inviting 20-30 people.

TheLadyJ Posted: Jan 12, 2009 02:48 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

My e-party wasn't really a party. We called it a 'celebration lunch'. Other than FH's and my immediate family, there were 10 other people, and those were all people in the bridal party.

We got over $900 in cash, $600 in gift certificates, and several expensive picture frames and candle holders. I never expected everyone was going to be so generous.

Have the party. It is less work for you than trying to have a BBQ. Next year, you'll be looking at photos of the party and you'll be glad you had one.

NYYankeeGirl72 Posted: Jan 12, 2009 03:09 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

I am sorry to hear about your FH...
. I know that your heart is set on having an engagement party, but if you know that the money would be put to better use, IMO I would say save your money and don't do the engagement party

I am not throwing an engagement party to begin with. I was thinking for FH and I to just have our immediate family go out to dinner to celebrate our engagement.

futureMrsJSL Posted: Jan 12, 2009 04:10 PM

Re: OK...same question I had before and still stressing

I'd take the party and just enjoy the engagement. I am not having an e-party and some times I regret it but I plan to have a ball for the bridal shower, lol. Hopefully, with your family and friends knowing your FH's situation they'll hook you up.