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OM_F_G

weirdo168 Posted:

OM_F_G

why couldn't have just eloped...FH's mother is driving me NUTS! We already sent out the invitations and now last minute she's snuck us an UPDATED guestlist - that totals over 15+ guest! I am NOT adding an extra table for her. Who does she think she is. This is MY WEDDING not HERS!
1 - she's upset with us for not having a traditional asian wedding (banquet and all ehhh = gross)
2 - she's upset that FH's not picking me up the day of
3 - she wanted us to change the date of our wedding to the week before
4- she thinks it's crazy for us to go on our honeymoon the very next day and not going straight home to her house for me to sleep over
5 - she's inviting a BOAT load of people...



thanks for letting me vent...at this point I'm scared what's going to happen the day before and the day of what SILLY STUPID request she will suggest!

cause FH & I having been arguing non stop about this - and it's completely stressing me out! that's giving me nightmares!

anyone else having issues?
flibbertigibbet Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

i think 90% of us feel this way about out FMILs.


just hang in there.

people are morons.
weirdo168 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

that's what I think - but it's FHs mom - I should hold my tongue but at this point I've had enough. I wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't have another crazy request the day of the wedding - I will so run out of there.

I mean she's NOT paying for this wedding - it's just FH & I, it should be exactly how the two of us want it. Not what she wants. We're already going to please her with her stupid request for a tea ceremony - she better give loads of money & jewelry (doubt it) - it'll probably be a $1 in there...OMG I feel like hiding
SoontobeGallagher Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by weddingbees

i think 90% of us feel this way about out FMILs.


just hang in there.

people are morons.



Yup, I agree.
kris_gets_hitched Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by weirdo168

4- she thinks it's crazy for us to go on our honeymoon the very next day and not going straight home to her house for me to sleep over



Okay I noticed you said 'typical Asian wedding'...so I'm curious about something...what you wrote above.

FH is from Bangladesh and his mom said that we'd be more comfortable staying at her house than in a hotel on our wedding night.

I thought she was just batsh!t crazy (I mean, she really is anyway) but is this a cultural thing???

In any event, FMILs make me want to do all sorts of ******* crazy things. I can barely tolerate mine at the moment.
weirdo168 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by kris_gets_hitched


Posted by weirdo168

4- she thinks it's crazy for us to go on our honeymoon the very next day and not going straight home to her house for me to sleep over



Okay I noticed you said 'typical Asian wedding'...so I'm curious about something...what you wrote above.

FH is from Bangladesh and his mom said that we'd be more comfortable staying at her house than in a hotel on our wedding night.

I thought she was just batsh!t crazy (I mean, she really is anyway) but is this a cultural thing???

In any event, FMILs make me want to do all sorts of ******* crazy things. I can barely tolerate mine at the moment.


I'm chinese - so for a typical traditional chinese wedding - usually a one stop shop - rent everything at a wedding studio - it's unheard of to BUY a dress (FH's Mother went nuts and thought I was nuts to buy a dress) the day of the wedding the groom sees the bride before the ceremony, the groom plays these silly games to try to be allowed to see her. then there's a tea ceremony to pay respects to their elders - serve them tea dressed in a red gown. So in trade for the tea the elders are to give the bride GOLD Jewelry (UGLY) or red envelopes with money inside, they have the party at a chinese restaurant - called a banquet - with like 10+ courses of your typical chinese foods which we don't care for...after the wedding she believes that I'm suppose to go home with them - NO THANKS!

So we're NON-Traditionalist opting for a very American wedding but FMIL does not like...Hope that clarifies why we geared towards an American wedding.
AwaitingAugust Posted:

Re: OM_F_G



sounds extremely annoying ... but yea, most of us on here have at least some issues with our FMILs.

if your FMIL isn't paying for this wedding, she has no right to request anything!

you need to speak to your FH and make sure you're both on the same page ... then the two of you can speak with his mother and make her stop her ridiculous requests.
BriansWifey Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

ughhh that sucksssss!!!!
she wants u to change ur date?! is she out of her mind???? i would completely ignore her. her ideas and requests are a bit much...
good luck...!
ladycapricorn Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by weddingbees

i think 90% of us feel this way about out FMILs.


just hang in there.

people are morons.



Girlllllllllllll I totally AGREE
grkbarbie Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

is she korean? nvmd ..read ur previous post

Clover23 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

i know how you feel...
weirdo168 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by grkbarbie

is she korean? nvmd ..read ur previous post



lol no she's not korean - she's Taiwanese - she drives me nuts...
kris_gets_hitched Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

Saw your update. I guess, though I try not to make generalized statements, in the Asian culture couples are expected to go home with the in-laws rather than go to a hotel, on their honeymoon, or back to their own hourse/apartment.

I don't get it, but I asked one of my best friends about this the other day too (when FMIL was telling us we would be more comfortable going back to her house after the wedding), and my friend is Thai and she was like 'ohhhh yeah, it's just weird, they expect you to consummate the marriage in their house'

So generally speaking, this seems to be kind of common among Asian culture...South-Asian or not.

However, this sure as hell won't be happening for us. Because generally speaking, I have the typical Irish temper and already told FMIL to BEAT IT LIKE MICHAEL JACKSON when she suggested it.
Jna2010 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

hang in there, youre almost there
Thats-What-She-Said Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I feel your pain. Well think of it this way. At least she wants to be involved. (even though it is crazy annoying). FMIL wants nothing to do with our wedding.

She is so consumed with FBIL's wedding in October and has said that she can only deal with one at a time. So no excitement for us until October2. To bad that by then she'll have lost her shot.
AngnShaun Posted:

Re: OM_F_G

Shauns dad decided that he wanted to invite some friends after all... soooo that adds another 10 people... i told him we dont have any invites left... if they are coming he tells me by June 1st and thats it... no exceptions

weirdo168 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by kris_gets_hitched

Saw your update. I guess, though I try not to make generalized statements, in the Asian culture couples are expected to go home with the in-laws rather than go to a hotel, on their honeymoon, or back to their own hourse/apartment.

I don't get it, but I asked one of my best friends about this the other day too (when FMIL was telling us we would be more comfortable going back to her house after the wedding), and my friend is Thai and she was like 'ohhhh yeah, it's just weird, they expect you to consummate the marriage in their house'

So generally speaking, this seems to be kind of common among Asian culture...South-Asian or not.

However, this sure as hell won't be happening for us. Because generally speaking, I have the typical Irish temper and already told FMIL to BEAT IT LIKE MICHAEL JACKSON when she suggested it.


LOL - I will not consummate the marriage at FMIL's house...I plan to do that on our honeymoon! Yes it seems that way that's it's common for Asian cultures - but I'm AMERICAN!!!
Same here this isn't going to happen - and FH agrees with me - that's why I'm marrying the guy since he's more Americanized than traditional.
weirdo168 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by Jna2010

hang in there, youre almost there



that's for the encouragement - just afraid she'll have some ridiculous request the day of and i'm going to leave and there will be NO wedding. I'll be the runaway bride
weirdo168 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by Stardutchess

Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I feel your pain. Well think of it this way. At least she wants to be involved. (even though it is crazy annoying). FMIL wants nothing to do with our wedding.

She is so consumed with FBIL's wedding in October and has said that she can only deal with one at a time. So no excitement for us until October2. To bad that by then she'll have lost her shot.



It's kinda late for her to be involved so late in the game - it's really not fair to us! I mean she could have brought up all these issues when we first got engaged. I'm getting paranoid as the day gets closer, thinking what stupid suggestion or request does she wants now...

Lucky girl...
weirdo168 Posted:

Re: OM_F_G


Posted by AngnShaun

Shauns dad decided that he wanted to invite some friends after all... soooo that adds another 10 people... i told him we dont have any invites left... if they are coming he tells me by June 1st and thats it... no exceptions



That's what FH told his mom - we're running out of invites and do not plan on purchasing more...

She said she'll pay for the extra guest - but I'm thinking where the heck is she getting the money - she doesn't make much and I sure hope FH doesn't fork it over or I'll have a FIT (but he promised me he wouldn't and he told her he wouldn't). I just hate it when people bring things up last minute and claim that we still have plenty of time. I mean if we add an extra table(s) - then we have to order extra favors, create additional menus, escort cards, contact the florist to include additional centerpieces, extra EVERYTHING = $$$ more money outta our wallets ---NOT COOL!

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