Originally FH and I were not going to have an e-party because we dont want people to feel obligated to bring gifts and I personally hate being the center of attn, so the whole e-party just wasnt my thing.
But then FMIL made a huge deal of it and she wanted us to have one and specifically told that side of the family to not give us gifts because we were having one. So we decided to have a 4th of july bbq honoring our engagement but then this weekend I had dinner with FIL's and FH's grandma was there and FMIL told her that we were having an e-party because my family was bugging me to have one!!!!!
Im so embarassed and most of my family gave us a gift already so I dont want them to feel it wasnt appreciated or that they have to get another gift.
What is your girls opinions? Thanks for reading this really long post!
RobNCyn
Posted:
Member since
Re: Opinion needed on E-party... (long sorry)
She sounds crazy like my mom. . . I would ask FH to talk to her b.c she is making you feel uncomfortable. And if you dont want to have the party - cancel it! It seems like she is one who really wants to have it anyway - tell her to make her own 4th of July bbq party.
michesq
Posted:
Member since
Re: Opinion needed on E-party... (long sorry)
maybe phrase wording of invite to be a bbq/party of all family and friends to just celebrate your engagement and stay away from eparty wording.
i honeslty think those who want to come will and may even bring another gift, those that don;t, won;t and if gave a gift already maybe they will come just to celebrate with you guys. don't feel bad for having a party
a lot of my friends gave us gift when we first got enagaged then FH's friends actually had a dinner party for us and some of my friends were annoyed and wanted to come- whether they gave a gift or not - so have the party
JellyBean09
Posted:
Member since
Re: Opinion needed on E-party... (long sorry)
I was originally against the idea of having an engagement party for the same reasons as you. Before we got engaged I said that we could have a party but write on the invitations gifts not necessary. But then FH being a guy said that on the invitations for his family he wasn't putting that and on the invitations for my family I could put whatever I like..nice right? Finally I came around and we are having a party, something small in his backyard. We don't have a registry set up and whatever people want to give I am fine with. If they don't want to give me anything that is cool also. I don't want them to feel obligated to give me an engagement party gift, a bridal shower and then wedding. That is a lot to ask of some people. I am just looking forward to celebrating with family and close friends!
FutureMrsLV
Posted:
Member since
Re: Opinion needed on E-party... (long sorry)
Posted by JellyBean09
I was originally against the idea of having an engagement party for the same reasons as you. Before we got engaged I said that we could have a party but write on the invitations gifts not necessary. But then FH being a guy said that on the invitations for his family he wasn't putting that and on the invitations for my family I could put whatever I like..nice right? Finally I came around and we are having a party, something small in his backyard. We don't have a registry set up and whatever people want to give I am fine with. If they don't want to give me anything that is cool also. I don't want them to feel obligated to give me an engagement party gift, a bridal shower and then wedding. That is a lot to ask of some people. I am just looking forward to celebrating with family and close friends!
If you really dont want a formal Eparty then word the invitations as a BBQ for 4th of july and to celebrate our engagement and maybe you can even put on the bottom of the invitation Please make you presence at the party be our Present something like that or put presents are not necesary or something.
Soon2BMrsC09
Posted:
Member since
Re: Opinion needed on E-party... (long sorry)
Posted by FutureMrsLV
Posted by JellyBean09
I was originally against the idea of having an engagement party for the same reasons as you. Before we got engaged I said that we could have a party but write on the invitations gifts not necessary. But then FH being a guy said that on the invitations for his family he wasn't putting that and on the invitations for my family I could put whatever I like..nice right? Finally I came around and we are having a party, something small in his backyard. We don't have a registry set up and whatever people want to give I am fine with. If they don't want to give me anything that is cool also. I don't want them to feel obligated to give me an engagement party gift, a bridal shower and then wedding. That is a lot to ask of some people. I am just looking forward to celebrating with family and close friends!
If you really dont want a formal Eparty then word the invitations as a BBQ for 4th of july and to celebrate our engagement and maybe you can even put on the bottom of the invitation Please make you presence at the party be our Present something like that or put presents are not necesary or something.
something along those lines or it could be like a 'meet the new family' type of thing where both sides can actually kick back and really get to know each other
VickiR510
Posted:
Member since
Re: Opinion needed on E-party... (long sorry)
i had family give gifts of money before our engagement party & i specifically told them that they were absolutely not expected to give another gift. It worked out well. But speak with FMIL & lether know how u r feeeling & let her know that your family doesnt mind if u have an eparty or not. make it clear in a kind respectful fashion Good Luck
