Parents paying for your wedding

bellissima Posted: Aug 15, 2010 02:57 PM

Parents paying for your wedding

Hi everyone. I am new to this site. My name is Melissa and my Fh's name is Josh and we are getting married 8/20/2011.

I have a question for all of you. I am an only child and my parents are not hurting for money. They have not offered to pay not one dollar for my wedding. what do you think. Is it unrealictic for me to want them to help pay for the wedding im not saying everything but a decent amount of it.

Is anyone elses parents paying for there wedding or helping out?

TIA

lbs418 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 04:05 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

My parents are paying for the entire thing. But things are different for everyone. I was told years ago that they would be paying for it. I am so thankful for them. If we had to pay for the wedding ourselves we would probably have to sell our house lol.

My parents absolutely love FH and thats why they are happy to be paying. As my Dad says to him all the time 'Remember less than a year and she'll be your responsability.'

J79 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 04:15 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

Welcome! and welcome to the stress! JK - kinda

my dad is paying 2/3 and FH's dad is paying 1/3...oh and his mom (his parents are divorced) is covering the cost of her guests

every situation is completely different though. maybe you should talk to your parents.

the first step in wedding planning is discussing budget and who is paying for what.

kfizz Posted: Aug 15, 2010 04:27 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

The question of who is paying for what is always stressful. My parents are paying for the RH and a few vendors, its what they can do. FH's parents are paying for our DJ, lighting, and any extras we add onto the food, FH and I are paying for everything else. At first my parents did not speak a word about paying or how much they wanted to contribute..it frustrated me but after they had time to take in the fact that it was really happening we all sat down and discussed.

Im sure they will say something to you eventually...they might just still be in shock like mine were.

Dont worry...everything will work out

aquag12283 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 04:32 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

My parents r paying for RH, limos and my dress. We haven't decided whose paying for flowers. I'm paying for photographer/videographer and probably favors and invites. Dj is included in our price pp at the rh. So my parents r paying for a good portion of my wedding

Panamasweet Posted: Aug 15, 2010 04:33 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

My parents have paid for about 95% of it. I knew they were going to help but i didnt expect them to pay for so much. I am my fathers only child and he said he has been waiting for this day. I didnt even know they had the finances to do this but they did.

I think i would feel a little confused if I knew my parents had it and didnt offer. Do you feel comfortable asking them for some type of help no matter how small and see what they say

FutureJOC Posted: Aug 15, 2010 05:01 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

Welcome to the boards!

FH and I will be paying for the entire wedding ourselves. We never asked our parents to help pay but we personally want to do this ourselves.

My mother is paying for my dress, accessories, hair and makeup and is mostly throwing my shower for me.

My dad has also been getting FH as much side work as he can and all the money that FH gets from that goes straight to the wedding so I think is my dad's way of contributing without actually saying so lol.

bellissima Posted: Aug 15, 2010 05:34 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

Thanks! I am not going to ask them to do it. they have to come to me and tell me they want to. i feel like since i am thier only child they should want to do it and believe me the money is not an issue.... and they also love DH so its not that.

JTG4EVER Posted: Aug 15, 2010 05:46 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

My parents are paying for everything except my dress. But you're right. They have to come to you and offer. It's a weird situation. Give it a little time. See what happens.

congrats and welcome!

Jennielee15 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 06:13 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

FH and I are completely broke, so when it came time to look at our budget i came right out to my parents and asked them how much they could resonably give. It's a very small amount because they are retiring this year. But any bit will help. My FMIL came right out and offered to pay for our honeymoon. FFIL is a jerk so we didn't even ask him! If he gives us anything I will be surprised! This is going to be a very hard amount of money to come up with but we will do it!

NellieBellie32 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 06:37 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

me and fh are paying for teh RH which is prolly like $25,000 (so we are paying for most) but parents and fils are taking care of the vendors, which so far is like $10,000 each side

My mom is helping out w/ my brothers wedding too right now so i know i cant ask for much more

njoseph8 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 06:38 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

FH and I always knew that we would have to pay 100% for the wedding. After we started planning my mom and her husband, thanks to his new job were able to give us about 2k toward it and HOPEFULLY another 3k plus his old friend is a photographer so he called in a favor and took care of that. besides that, we are all on our own but them helping at all was a complete shock

KarynK Posted: Aug 15, 2010 06:48 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

My parents sent me a check with M-I-C-K-E-Y in the memo part. They know I LOVE WDW and wanted me to go get married there. They gave a very generous check to us and I am so grateful. My FI family on the other hand mentioned only once they will contribute, but never gave us a check or mentioned anything else. So I am not holding my breath. My FI and I are paying for the rest.
BTW- FI wanted his family to be there when we say I do's, so that is why we aren't doing WDW. I wanted just me, him and my son. Oh well. I still got the RH I wanted

allornil Posted: Aug 15, 2010 07:08 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

Im an only child too. My parents hadnt offered to help until i called and explained i was upset.

My Dad told me to put everything down on paper and we'd review it and they'd discuss how much they could give me.

The best thing imo to do is discuss it. The worst they can say is no.

Tomsbride Posted: Aug 15, 2010 07:08 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

FH's parents are paying for the RH. We are payig for everything else. It's not that bad as long as you make a budget, stick to it and try to have a long engagement.

My parents paid for our engagement party and may pay for my dress, bridal shower and rehearsal dinner depeding on how money is.

CantWait2Wed Posted: Aug 15, 2010 07:11 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

I wish someone was helping out! I don't know how we are going to swing this by FH keeps telling me we can

GlitterBox24 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 08:48 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

You lucky girls... Fh and I are paying entirely for a 250 guest wedding!!!! Sniff sniff

leesah85 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 08:58 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

I didn't think my parents were going to offer to pay for anything, but then about 5 months after our engagement, my parents called me and FH over and told us they wanted to give us $x amount of dollars and we were overjoyed (even though it's not even a 1/4 of the total wedding cost).

Ang9483 Posted: Aug 15, 2010 09:08 PM

Re: Parents paying for your wedding

My parents gave me 2k towards the wedding and my mom is paying for my dress and accessories and throwing my shower.

my inlaws are giving us 2k towards the wedding but thats our gift as well.