i'm sorry if this is really personal, i just don't have many people to talk to these days- i've been quite lonely. i've been debating for a few days whether or not to share this with you ladies..but i've been going a little bit crazy. one minute im super excited and happy, the next im scared out of my mind. the next i'm angry. the more i think about it, the more confused i get. anyway, i'm adopted. and i've been searching for my birthmother forever, and i actually found her this weekend. she lives in oklahoma. i saw pictures of her and her family, i read a personal bio about her life. (mind you i've been searching for FOREVER and she was on classmates.com...go figure.) it's a really surreal type of feeling. i don't even know if i've fully grasped it yet. the killer is, i have her phone number. i dont know whether to call her, or write a letter. Writing a letter i think would kill me, because each day i don't get a response, i would think that she doesn't want anything to do with me. each day would be agonizing. calling her would be better for me, although i'm awkward on the phone. i'm sure however that it would be a huge shock to her and she wouldn't know what to do with herself. i found out two days ago that i'm an aunt, a niece, a cousin, and a sister to a whole family that i've never even met. I've been waiting my whole life for this. I'm just super scared. but then again, happy/relieved beyond belief. I'm not expecting a response to any of this....i just needed to vent a little bit. I haven't really talked to anyone about it. thanks for reading/listening. -brooke
ddnsp618
Posted:
Member since
Re: personal business..a little long
brooke,
im not adopted but i would imagine that if i was i would be very curious as well. i just hope that if you do/did contact her, she is willing to reach out to you. do you know the circumstances of your adoption? this may make a difference in wether or not you should call her.
im so sorry you are going through this....we are all here for you
brookelovesjimbo
Posted:
Member since
Re: personal business..a little long
thanks again for all the support. i really appreciate it ive been freaking out. i think i may just call today and see what happens. im crossing my finger that it goes well. as they say, prepare for the worst and hope for the best, right?
baba022
Posted:
Member since
Re: personal business..a little long
Posted by brookelovesjimbo
thanks again for all the support. i really appreciate it ive been freaking out. i think i may just call today and see what happens. im crossing my finger that it goes well. as they say, prepare for the worst and hope for the best, right?
Keep us posted on what you decided to do. I have my fingers crossed for you. If you do decide to call, jot a few things down before hand so that way you dont forget what you have to or want to say to her.
FutureMrsM
Posted:
Member since
Re: personal business..a little long
Posted by Espo22
WOW i can see your dilemma. I don't know what i would do, but you have to follow your heart. If you don't you'll always wonder what if, and this will always be something in the back of your mind that will eat away at you.
Knowing me, i would do both. I would write her a letter, i think its great to do this bc this way you can get all your feelings out in the open and say everything you've ever wanted to say. When you talk to the person you dont get the chance to say everything you wanted to. But in the letter let her know that you will call her in about a week, you'll give her time to process all this and get over the shock. I am sure if you just call her first reaction would be 'OMG is she angry with me' she wont know what to say. This way if you write her a letter first to let her know you are not mad and just want to talk, she will be alot more comfortable when you call her.
good luck i hope you get everything you ever wanted out of it
