Photo question: Do we have to get his parent's an album
Original post by LisaJill
Ok, this is sticky. My parents are paying for some of our wedding and his parents are paying for none (they are divorced). My mom and I are going to look at photographers in the next few weeks and she is paying for the photographer. So she calls me tonight to tell me that usually the package that photographers give comes with two parent albums and she does not want to pay for his mom's album considering she is not contributing at all to the wedding. In a way, I kind of agree with my mom, but how do I phrase it to his mom?? I really think if she gives us nothing and she has the few hundred that it costs for her own personal album (if she even wants one) then she should buy it herself. Its not like she is chipping in at all to help us through this wedding. Am I wrong for thinking like this? How do i phrase it to her?
TheBigDay
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Re: Photo question: Do we have to get his parent's an album
I think a key phrase here is 'Its not like she is chipping in at all to help us through this wedding. ' Chipping in as far as what? money, time, labor? I agree with doing it as an xmas gift from you and FH. It should not be a financial issue for your parents to pay for what is an extra for your IL's, this is something that is you and your FH or your IL's should purchase.
My mom feels stuff like photography is an extra for a wedding, if you think about it photographer is really for YOU, so in a way the photographer paid for is like a gift from your parents to you and FH! It has become such a normal thing I think we forget there are costly stuff for weddings that are in reality EXTRAS!
franksgirl323
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Re: Photo question: Do we have to get his parent's an album
I agree with these smart ladies....I would just pay for the album yourself as a gift. It would cause more harm than good to not get it.
If its too expensive, ask about the parent 'folio'(i think that's what its called). Its not an album, it a less expensive alternative to the album. I dont know if all photographers offer it, but it doesnt hurt to ask.
MrsH1156
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Re: Photo question: Do we have to get his parent's an album
That's a tough one. I think if it comes with the package, just get it. I know your mom is paying for the photographer but I think you should do what you and your FH think is best. JMHO.
RachelandJimmy
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Re: Photo question: Do we have to get his parent's an album
Posted by OctRo05
I believe that as your new MIL she deserves the album. YOU are having (and want) the wedding. Your mom helping out financially is a wonderful gift. It should not be expected that anyone should help pay for your party.
Family is about love and support. That is not always in the form of cash. Were it not for your MIL, you would not have met you FH. We are paying for everything ourselves, and I still love my IL's - they will happily receive an album. JMHO
Absolutely
elp6421
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Re: Photo question: Do we have to get his parent's an album
Posted by PrincessRose
I was in the same situation. We simply told my ILs that my parents were paying for everything and that if they wanted an album they were expected to contribute for it. They did, no problems.
I'm sorry, but the way my ILs treated my parents, my mom and dad could certainly not be expected to pay for their album, and DH and I couldn't afford it.
If MIL can afford to wear a dress that cost more than mine and then tell me, 'well, that's because you were on a budget and I only get a dress like this every ten years or so', she can afford $250 for an album.
