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Please Read!

LIWeddings Posted:

Please Read!

There has been a lash of quotes on the site. And some have chosen to vote on them. Well, here's ours!

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out'?

Who was the first one who thought that the white thing that came from a hen's butt looked edible?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! And they think Goofy is the stupid one!!!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme stuff, why didn't he just buy dinner?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window.

Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint
somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure.

Whay do they call the place where you park 'a driveway' and the place where you drive 'a Parkway'?
WithThisRing Posted:

Re: Please Read!

LOL..

you guys rock
nylisa Posted:

Re: Please Read!

Those are the best quotes. You guys are the best.
MaryK Posted:

Re: Please Read!

I love it!!!

Why do they call them apartments if they are so close together?!


Thanks for the laugh LI Weddings!
shamma Posted:

Re: Please Read!

who sent you that email?? I got that this am, I was going to post it too...GMTA
Happy_Bride Posted:

Re: Please Read!

I'm going to 'PEE MY PANTS!!' LOL! Very cute
OctBride03 Posted:

Re: Please Read!

LOL!!! LIW that was hysterical! I often wonder about some of those! Thanks for the laugh!
WithThisRing Posted:

Re: Please Read!

why do people hit the numbers harder on the remote or bang it against the couch rather then get up to change the chanel??

nylisa Posted:

Re: Please Read!

Why do people hit the elevator button again once it is already pressed?

WithThisRing Posted:

Re: Please Read!

Lisa: i dont know but i sure as heck do that all the time.

Misty Posted:

Re: Please Read!

What do you mean, that doesn't make it come faster?
nylisa Posted:

Re: Please Read!

We think that the more we hit the button the faster the elevator is going to come.

Julybaby Posted:

Re: Please Read!

My FI does that elevator button 'trick'. It's so annoying! Very funny quotes LIWeddings. I think I will have to share them with my class tomorrow (yes, another lesson plan done!)!
LnP2003 Posted:

Re: Please Read!

hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... you guys are hysterical!

jennbaby Posted:

Re: Please Read!

you must be very bored today

wacky Posted:

Re: Please Read!

Very cute.
balilove Posted:

Re: Please Read!

Good questions??

I have one, why do they call it a freeway when it's not free???

And a parkway--I think if I parked there I might have a problem???
Samanthas Mom Posted:

Re: Please Read!

very cute!
christy Posted:

Re: Please Read!

This is hysterical!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

112903 Posted:

Re: Please Read!

Great quotes!!!

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