**PMS SUVIVAL GUIDE**
The Hormone Hostage
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands!
This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!
Dangerous:
What's for dinner?
Safer:
Can I help you with dinner?
Safest:
Where would you like to go for dinner?
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine.
Dangerous:
Are you wearing that?
Safer:
Wow, you sure look good in brown!
Safest:
WOW! Look at you!
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine
Dangerous:
What are you so worked up about?
Safer:
Could we be overreacting?
Safest:
Here's my paycheck.
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine.
Dangerous:
Should you be eating that?
Safer:
You know, there are a lot of apples left.
Safest:
Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine.
Dangerous:
What did you DO all day?
Safer:
I hope you didn't over-do it today.
Safest:
I've always loved you in that robe!
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some more wine.
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1 Pass My Shotgun
2 Psychotic Mood Shift
3 Perpetual Munching Spree
4 Puffy Mid-Section
5 People Make me Sick
6 Provide Me with Sweets
7 Pardon My Sobbing
8 Pimples May Surface
9 Pass My Sweat pants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect
Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh!
...Or men who need a warning.
And remember: Money talks .... but Chocolate SINGS!!!
The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his own hands!
This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, co-worker or significant other!
Dangerous:
What's for dinner?
Safer:
Can I help you with dinner?
Safest:
Where would you like to go for dinner?
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine.
Dangerous:
Are you wearing that?
Safer:
Wow, you sure look good in brown!
Safest:
WOW! Look at you!
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine
Dangerous:
What are you so worked up about?
Safer:
Could we be overreacting?
Safest:
Here's my paycheck.
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine.
Dangerous:
Should you be eating that?
Safer:
You know, there are a lot of apples left.
Safest:
Can I get you a piece of chocolate with that?
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some wine.
Dangerous:
What did you DO all day?
Safer:
I hope you didn't over-do it today.
Safest:
I've always loved you in that robe!
Ultra Safe:
Here, have some more wine.
13 Things PMS Stands For:
1 Pass My Shotgun
2 Psychotic Mood Shift
3 Perpetual Munching Spree
4 Puffy Mid-Section
5 People Make me Sick
6 Provide Me with Sweets
7 Pardon My Sobbing
8 Pimples May Surface
9 Pass My Sweat pants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
and my favorite one.
13. Potential Murder Suspect
Pass this on to all of your hormonal friends and those who might need a good laugh!
...Or men who need a warning.
And remember: Money talks .... but Chocolate SINGS!!!
