Poll: Would you ever request something that wasn't on the menu?

I know that sometimes people have issues with certain foods, allergies, etc.

but, I'm talking about going out somewhere and asking for something that just isn't on the menu.

DH has a few members of his family who will always come out to events and they like to drink. But, when the events are smaller, mixed drinks aren't always offered.

These people will ask the facility to run them a separate tab and then ask other guests if they'd like something. They will always offer to pay for other people's drinks. I guess they think it's polite to do this, but when I am the host, it really upsets me.

My mother hosted a get-together and when she saw what these people were doing, she was extremely hurt and embarassed and felt like she should have had an open bar or something (it was an afternoon brunch to celebrate a special event)

I am thinking about saying something to them. I have known these people a long time (they actually introduced me to DH), but our relationship has been strained for the past couple years. I know that it's unlikely to be repaired, so telling them to stop ordering speciality items won't make our relationship any worse, nor will it make it any better.

DO NOT SAY ANYTHING TO THEM

that is actually a very nice thing to do...it's totally acceptable to run your own bar tab at an event.

they aren't doing anything wrong-and Emily Post/Miss Manners would say the same thing.

It's unfortunate that your Mother felt uncomfortable. But, I can all but promise you that these people weren't doing this to offend her. When you have an affair where wine, beer, and coffee are included-that means that it's a CASH bar, it doesn't mean that they were ordering specialty drinks.

Try not to be hurt or offended by thier actions....

JMO......

I wouldn't say anything to them, I can understand that your mom was embarassed, but by confronting them, you will only cause problems & you will be calling much more attention to the situation.

But to answer your question - if I went somwhere I would not order something that wasn't offered, I really don't see why some people can't stick to the menu for a few hours.