possible dilema

so my mom and my FMIL were talking about gifts and all that ..so my mom said just what was expected as gifts..not like i would get mad if it was anyother way..but i always do at least waht i expected the person paid for to have me at their wedding

she thinks that anything more then $30 is just crazy

when my mom said her and my step dad never go to a wedding and give anything less then like $200

maybe this is just aitalian-NY thing to give a lot..

i dont know how to handle this

only because we are not registering

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Posted by failurebydsign

so my mom and my FMIL were talking about gifts and all that ..so my mom said just what was expected as gifts..not like i would get mad if it was anyother way..but i always do at least waht i expected the person paid for to have me at their wedding

she thinks that anything more then $30 is just crazy

when my mom said her and my step dad never go to a wedding and give anything less then like $200

maybe this is just aitalian-NY thing to give a lot..

i dont know how to handle this

only because we are not registering

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Yeah i dont leave anything less than $200 either.

I never give less than $300 if it is both of us, $150 for just me.

Family gets $500+ ( lol i have tiny family so its safe to say this he he)

but people will give what they can afford/what they think is right

I was told that first of all guests should not be expected to give gifts.... Fast forward to 2007... It's customary to cover the cost of the plate. So if you are bringing a guest about $200 is about right.

Earlier this week they were having a discussion about wedding gift giving on Z100 and this was the type of situation they were talking about.

ETA: When I went to my boss' wedding I gave $150 for me and FH (he was my BF at the time). That was because I didn't really have any to give. There are no real rules just what people can do.

It's all relative.. people give out what they think is appropriate. There's really no way to handle this because you can't tell people what amount to give someone for their wedding.

Since you are going to have a lot of non-NYers who typically give a non-monetary gift, I would register... people are going to give you gifts whether you register or not, so they might as well be gifts that you picked out right?

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by failurebydsign

so my mom and my FMIL were talking about gifts and all that ..so my mom said just what was expected as gifts..not like i would get mad if it was anyother way..but i always do at least waht i expected the person paid for to have me at their wedding

she thinks that anything more then $30 is just crazy

when my mom said her and my step dad never go to a wedding and give anything less then like $200

maybe this is just aitalian-NY thing to give a lot..

i dont know how to handle this

only because we are not registering

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Yeah i dont leave anything less than $200 either.

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I dont either.

I am finding this a sticky situation too. She might of been offended but its hard to say. I know for my family my grandfather thinks $50 is a excellent gift to give at a wedding. He had his own brother call him up and yell at him over it because that is all he gave at his daughters wedding. Now they are not talking to each other.

I don't think I ever gave less then $100 per person at a wedding. If its family i gave more.

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Posted by AMGBride2008

It's all relative.. people give out what they think is appropriate. There's really no way to handle this because you can't tell people what amount to give someone for their wedding.

Since you are going to have a lot of non-NYers who typically give a non-monetary gift, I would register... people are going to give you gifts whether you register or not, so they might as well be gifts that you picked out right?

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i dont want to have a bunch of gifts to travel with..its hard enough planning this and all the stuff im gonig to have to carry with me anyways

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Posted by failurebydsign

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Posted by AMGBride2008

It's all relative.. people give out what they think is appropriate. There's really no way to handle this because you can't tell people what amount to give someone for their wedding.

Since you are going to have a lot of non-NYers who typically give a non-monetary gift, I would register... people are going to give you gifts whether you register or not, so they might as well be gifts that you picked out right?

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i dont want to have a bunch of gifts to travel with..its hard enough planning this and all the stuff im gonig to have to carry with me anyways

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Well, like I said.... you're going to get gifts either way. You can always ship them home instead of lugging them... it may be a little more costly, but it doesn't seem like you have a ton of options

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Posted by failurebydsign

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Posted by AMGBride2008

It's all relative.. people give out what they think is appropriate. There's really no way to handle this because you can't tell people what amount to give someone for their wedding.

Since you are going to have a lot of non-NYers who typically give a non-monetary gift, I would register... people are going to give you gifts whether you register or not, so they might as well be gifts that you picked out right?

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i dont want to have a bunch of gifts to travel with..its hard enough planning this and all the stuff im gonig to have to carry with me anyways

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They wouldn't just mail the gift?

Definately register. I got the ol' cheapos in my fam, but have noticed at previous weddings people send a gift and usually bring an 'envelope' to wedding.... AND SOME don't bring or give anything!!!! And those people, you just spit in their food