Possible dilema and etiquette question! Help!

princess99 Posted: Feb 16, 2004 01:39 PM

Possible dilema and etiquette question! Help!

One of my very good friends does not have a boyfriend to go to my wedding with, but she does not know anyone that will be there. So I told her that she can bring a friend with her. The friend she had asked originally has been very unreliable lately, her FH has been very sick as well as she has health issues going on. So she has a back up person to go with, her very good friend, Denise. The question is how does she break it to her gently about her not being reliable and not having me done out of paying for her when she might cancel at the last minute? Help!!!! (PS She has spoken to her about this b4, and she has stated she will be there , but honestly she has been cancelling all the time when she makes plans with her, and her fh health issues are pretty serious.) How does she handle this?

AJsMommy122 Posted: Feb 16, 2004 01:41 PM

Re: Possible dilema and etiquette question! Help!

why dosent she just say that you changed your mind about letting people bring guests b/c the list got too long and you couldnt afford it

TwoBugs Posted: Feb 16, 2004 01:44 PM

Re: Possible dilema and etiquette question! Help!

With all she's going through, I don't think it's fair to call her unreliable (to her face).

Instead, maybe your friend can say something to her like 'Princess99 needs to know by this date (make it sooner rather than later) whether you can make it, because she needs to tell the caterer. If you think there's even a small chance you will not be able to come, you should tell me now. Are you sure of that? Are you absolutely sure???'

She shouldn't mention the 'back up' friend, of course.

princess99 Posted: Feb 16, 2004 08:18 PM

Re: Possible dilema and etiquette question! Help!

I understand what you mean by calling her unreliable to her face, I never would do that. This girl did not have the decency to call my sister to tell her she was not going to make it to my shower after she rsvp'd she would be there. I am going to tell my friend to try to talk to her and find out what is going on.