ok so FH's parents are divorced..... his Dad now has a girlfriend for the past few years.... FH doesn't want anything to do with her, and I completely understand.
So we tell FH's mom that we are planning a wedding and she's thrilled.... but - the first thing she says is 'that b**** better not be invited' she starts saying how if FH's Dad brings this woman, she will not come to the wedding!!!
FH doesn't really want this woman there and I honestly could care less.....
The dilemma -
FH's Dad is helping us pay for the wedding.... How the heck do we say 'Dad you can't bring your girlfriend'
FH's Dad is aware that FH doesn't want anything to do with this woman...
Any advice??
LaBellaVita622
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
Wow yea that's tough..does FMIL know he's helping too?? Stuff like this puts the kids (you guys) in such a position basically like choose me or him! that's terrible. I hope they can all get past this and just get along for FH's sake
annabellagirl
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
NOPE, FMIL doesnt know that FFIL is helping us... I KNEW this was going to happen.... And i feel awful because I see how annoyed and sad this is making FH.....
I mean, we have plenty of time, and a lot can happen before the big day - its just annoying!
I was hoping for a drama-free wedding LOL
Everything has been running smoothly up until this point...
LaBellaVita622
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
Posted by annabellagirl
NOPE, FMIL doesnt know that FFIL is helping us... I KNEW this was going to happen.... And i feel awful because I see how annoyed and sad this is making FH.....
I mean, we have plenty of time, and a lot can happen before the big day - its just annoying!
I was hoping for a drama-free wedding LOL
Everything has been running smoothly up until this point...
what if FH tells her? that he is helping and it's putting alot of unecessary stress on him?
MrsJPH2012
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
I agree with LaBella.. but it seems like its not just FMIL that doesn't want this woman there, it sounds like your FH doesn't either. Is your FFIL contributing so much that you couldn't do the wedding without him? Because I would hope that FMIL would understand that much that its out of your control, but if it meant enough to FH for her to not be there that he doesn't take the money... I think it all depends on how affected FH is by this, and what steps are neccessary to make HIM feel best, and not FMIL (although its always nice when they're happy as well)
annabellagirl
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
Ahhh... I guess for now, Ill just try and sweep this under the rug for the time being.
The day is about me and FH - nobody else!
Im sure FH will talk to his dad and mention that he would rather not have her there - but i just hope FFIL understands.... He is aware that nobody wants this woman around, and well it will put us all in an uncomfortable situation.
Wish me luck - i need to sleep on this one lol
wenR
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
She needs to get over it already..the day is not about her. She should be there to support his son and that's all. She should just bring a hot date of her own.
ETA: I meant her son..
annabellagirl
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
Posted by wenR
She needs to get over it already..the day is not about her. She should be there to support his son and that's all. She should just bring a hot date of her own.
ETA: I meant her son..
LOLOLOLOL i agree! I told FH, nopt to freak out because if his dad does bring this woman, its not like we will even see her! we will have 150 other people that we will be spending time with!
courtnjay2012
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Re: possible dilemma with divorced parents?
I'm in a similar situation and this was the part that scared me the most.
I know its hard because FH father is contributing. At this point its not so much about your FMIL. IF your FFIL knows that his son wants nothing to do with his girlfriend I think for his sons happiness he can go without her. You and FH will never get this day back ,
The both of you deserve to be stress free and happy. It would be different I think if your FH had a relationship with your FFIL's girlfriend. Maybe FH can try talking to his father about how he feels about the situation but also mention how grateful he is that FFIL is contributing to the wedding.
I know that when its gets closer to our date that I am telling my father that I do not want his wife there. Hopefully he sees how much the situation hurts me and will understand. I have no relationship with this woman nor do I want one. I don't mean to be harsh but over the years there has been a lot of pain and she helped contribute to it. I try my hardest to get along with everyone and respect everyone but some people just don't deserve to be apart of my special day.
I wish you the best and I hope the stress this is causing will be relieved soon.
