Hi all Last night was our first night of pre cana. We met at some married coupled home filled out questionares and shared them with our partners. We were encouraged to talk.
I know this may seem like a really silly question, but the issue of living together came up. I cant tell them we live together right? But then I am lying at religious services help
Naunie
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Re: Pre Cana
Not sure if my experience will solve your issue, but...
I was told to not divulge that we live together, when we first met with the preist to book the church for the ceremony. One of the first questions asked, when he was taking our info, was 'What is your address'. We have the same address- we weren't going to lie. The preist seemed a little surprised, but then just calmly said 'You are aware that living together is different than marraige, you will no longer have that freedom in the back of yourhead that comforts you, saying that you can leave at any time...' The thing is this: The whole point of this religion, is that God forgives, and people have no right to judge, only God does. If my preist could see our situation with an open mind, then I say go ahead and spill the beans, but maybe not until you're asked...
MayBride06
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Re: Pre Cana
Although not accepted in the catholic church I think they realize that cohabitation is done more and more frequently. I think that it would be better to tell the truth than to lie. besides I am not sure that you are the first couple in Precana to live together. My friend got married in a catholic church and she was pregnant. Nobody said anything to her.
JXNOscar
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thanks
carlsbride
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Do not lie. Couples that co-habitate before marriage have different issues than couples who have not. This knowledge will help them (the Priest, the pre-Cana couple, etc.) in helping you prepare for your marriage. Do not lie.
elmtobe
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when we wet for our marriage interview we gave the priest our 'permanent address' i.e, our parents house as we live in an apt and don't intend on staying long...other married gals have told me to lie about everything from living together, birth control, sex etc....do what you are most comfortable with, it's not like they can revoke your ability to get married b/c you live together
jimmysgrl
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We were completely upfront and honest about living together and we had absolutely no problems. It is so common nowadays. Even when I went into confession the priest said he understood why some couples do it but also that we should abstain.
klingklang77
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tons of people live together these days, i am sure there is a way they deal with it in this day and age. today i went and talked to a priest about booking a date (another post) and he had a FOCCUS like session for a couple that has a divorced person in it, so if they do that, then i am sure living together is minor.
don't lie, they just want to help you in your marriage, and they want the divorce rate to go down. they are there to help and to ensure and help for the best possible marriage that you can have.
alex110879
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Pre cana is not designed to get you introuble with your church, anything said there is believed to be confidential. We have 3 couples who live together in ours and we openly discuss it so i wouldnt worry about it
JXNOscar
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thanks everyone so helpful!
mable
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I too am living w/ my Fh and I am pregnant too.. We start our precana on Friday. The only advantage I have is that my uncle is the priest who will be marrying us.
m&m
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We had a couple who lived together in our pre-cana group, and our leaders didn't blink an eye. I think you will both get more out of it if you are open and honest. (I admit, I might feel differently if it were a priest running the program).
