Pre-nups?

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Posted by fashionhag

All of you who have or are getting pre-nups, do you have wills? If not, don't ya think you should get those too?

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Yes, we have wills also.

I would sign one if either of us had substantial assets or inheritances. I don't see the issue with it.

If signing a prenup is what is right for you and your FI, then who cares what we all think? You must feel comfortable in what you do. Don't defend your decision to anyone !!

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Posted by CaCRmr

Nope......what's mine is mine and what's his is mine!!!!

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I agree! No prenup here.

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Posted by nov04LIbride

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Posted by fashionhag

I don't know where you guys live, but nowhere in the law does it state that upon divorce, your husband has a right to your parents property. So I don't understand the concern there. I guess if you are talking aboutt their property getting passed down to you. If that is the case, then a will can solve those issues.

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I believe (from my parent's divorce) all assets are divided 50/50, and then alimony decided. So, say your parents passed away and left you their house, and $200,000, you would have to split the $ and the value of the house (either buy out his share or sell the house and split the cash value). So this isn't an issue if the parents are living, but if they passed away while the marriage was intact the husband would be entitled to 1/2 of the assets left to the parent's daughter (wife) in their will.

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I just inherited my parents estate and I still don't want nor need a prenup. I am not looking at the situation with 'love goggles' but it does not need to be held above his head that I own a house and inherited X amount of dollars. When I was unemployed, my FH put food in my mouth and gave me a bed to sleep in. Which is more important?? Food and a bed. I used a portion of my inheritance to buy him a nice watch, he has never had a really nice watch before. Do you think I want the watch back if g-d forbid we don't live happily ever after? Hells no, he can keep it.

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Posted by teach2be

I would sign one if either of us had substantial assets or inheritances. I don't see the issue with it.

If signing a prenup is what is right for you and your FI, then who cares what we all think? You must feel comfortable in what you do. Don't defend your decision to anyone !!

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well put

A good friend of mine is signed a prenup. I think it is a very smart thing to do - of course, I'm not doing it, but then again I was never know for being wise.

The thing is, it doesn't matter how much $$$$ you have now - you are also protecting your future earnings. And why not figure this stuff out now when you love each other rather than when (if it happens) you are at each other's throats?

It can also protect your future children if you decide now who will contribute what to their education. My parents played this one big time - they'd play 'chicken' with each other and my college tuition all the time. If you work this out now, I think it is mature and shows love and respect, not a lack of it.

Hmmmm, I may have just talked myself into one.

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Posted by steph4777

Lawyers correct me if I am wrong, but I don't think NY is a community property state. Therefore your spouse doesn't automatically get 50% of assets.

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You're correct. NY is not a community property state and marital assets are divided based upon the theory of equitable distribution, which can include both monetary and non-monetary contributions to the marriage when determining what is equitable. Equitable doesn't necessarily mean equal.

And as I said earlier, inheritances are not subject to equitable distribution unless the money has been commingled with marital assets and you can no longer prove what money was used for what.

nope. i trust him

I don't work right now - as FH is supporting me through college! So, ah, no prenup for us. It never even crossed our minds.

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Posted by allaboutthecake

I am having a pre-nup. The money that my father has worked and is working so hard to make should not be split between my FI and I God forbid we divorce. I am co-owners with my brothers and sisters in a few of my father's companies and we do have our names on a bunch of houses and properties, so just having a will from my father would not suffice. If things were reversed I would not hesitate to sign a pre-nup if my FMIL wanted me to.

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Propery acquired prior to the marriage is not considered a marital asset, which I'm sure your attorney (and you should have an attorney for each of you, not just one attorney drawing up the document) will tell you.

I am not having a pre-nup though I want one! He has so many loans from medical school!


Can a pre-nup talk about the LOANS that we don't want to inherit incase of divorce?



The loans are our only assets at this point.

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Posted by May05Bride

The loans are our only assets at this point.

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Debts are liabilities, not assets, and any debts acquired prior to the marriage, I believe remain separate from marital debts. I'm not 100% sure on that one and would have to check it out, but just as if his medical license was acquired prior to the marriage, you are not entitled to part of the value of the license, I also don't think you are responsible for the debts.

FI had many debts coming into our relationship. Our prenup covers the fact that in order for us to get approved for our mortgage, we (I) paid off his debts. I was happy to do this because it helped secure our financial future. However, FI felt he wanted to repay me.

So for example, god forbid we get a divorce, our prenup states that if we sell the house within 15 years of marriage, it is not an equal split, I first receive the amount of the downpayment and the amount we paid to clear his debt. Then the balance will get split.

Those of you who mentioned the student loans if you were interested in getting a prenup could probably put some kind of clause in there about it.

We also have stipulations about our future children as someone mentioned.

I see both sides of the issue, so I am not defending myself. But none of my friends have a prenup, and I was curious how others felt about it and what issues they covered.

i heard on the radio this morning that britney spears is not getting one... much to her mother's fury....
i'm not getting one, but i can tell you if i was worth $100 million ....i might reconsider!!!