Priest vs. couple living together

Original post by AMGBride2008

Jul 18, 2006 09:35 AM

FH & I made the call in to the church and are waiting for the priest to call us back to schedule an appt to meet with him (YAY!). For those of you brides out there that live with you FH, did the priest give you any flack about your living situation?
For some reason I'm really nervous about that topic coming up in our first meeting

mrsh2b Posted: Jul 18, 2006 10:37 AM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Honestly, just don't tell them. That may be the wimpy way out but IMO who needs the hassle? They gave my one friend a really hard time about it in a few churches. One church even said they wouldn't marry them. I just said I lived with my parents and was done with it. They don't need to know.

JXNOscar Posted: Jul 18, 2006 10:39 AM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

We didn't tell our priest

smara Posted: Jul 18, 2006 10:42 AM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Posted by mrsh2b

Honestly, just don't tell them. That may be the wimpy way out but IMO who needs the hassle? They gave my one friend a really hard time about it in a few churches. One church even said they wouldn't marry them. I just said I lived with my parents and was done with it. They don't need to know.

I agree.. its not worht it cause you dont know what kind fo reaction you are going to get. I thought it was worse lying to the priest but if I had to do it again I would have. Plus after we told him he made us give 2 separate addresses anyway. Go figure

PegaLega Posted: Jul 18, 2006 10:59 AM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Ours didnt, it didnt even really come up. When he asked each of us for our address we told him it was the same and he just went on. The only thing he did say that made us both laugh was that if we did the Pre-Cana during a weekend retreat we would be in seperate rooms 'of-course'

AMGBride2008 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 10:59 AM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

All very interesting POV. I'm leaning in favor of lying, which is horrible!!! I know FH is going to immediately be against lying. I guess we'll have to ponder what to do tonight. Who knew this was something to stress about!!

AllJoy Posted: Jul 18, 2006 11:56 AM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

I was a little nervous about it too. I told him that he lives w/his aunt and I live upstairs in a separate apt. Good Luck

Mooshyboo Posted: Jul 18, 2006 12:02 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

I was very nervous 2 ~ but he did not say much about the situation! I felt as though he would frown upon it... but it was fine.

Sweetpea130000 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 12:12 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

I was really nervous too, but our priest was okay with it, but I don't know how common that is.

Mooshyboo Posted: Jul 18, 2006 12:19 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Posted by Shiv

i was so nervous about this but he didn't even react to it- i gave my address then he asked FI what his was and he said the same and that was it- he said nothing, what a relief!

That is what happened with us...

roxyvelas Posted: Jul 18, 2006 12:36 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

We did not tell him that we are living together because we were lectured so much about everything else that we just didnt want to take the risk. We gave our parents addresses

Mandyin2007 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 12:59 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

My priest didn't even mention it. We got scared when we had to fill out or FOCUS papers because it has a seperate section for couples living together and one of the questions was something to the effect of, 'Do you understand why the church is against cohabitation before marriage?'

Only one couple who we went to precana with didn't live together. And again it was barely mentioned in our classes.

diamondgrlie Posted: Jul 18, 2006 01:16 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

I lied and said that DH lived in an apt. and I lived with my parents.

EGreene79 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 01:57 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Part of me didn't feel right about lying to a priest, but also I wasn't dead set on getting married in a church so if they didn't want to marry me because of that - then I didn't want them to marry me! FH's mom tells me I have too much pride

But I haven't heard of many places rejecting people for cohabitation. Actually, our deacon said that if they didn't marry cohabitating couples they wouldn't have too many weddings! I agree it wouldn't hurt to get feedback from people who got married there.

woobie113007 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 02:02 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

How bad is this?
I told the priest I was still living at home.
Eeeeeeek

nickelpick Posted: Jul 18, 2006 02:03 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

umm t his is bad, but we lied just in case!!!

AMGBride2008 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 02:15 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Posted by EGreene79

But I haven't heard of many places rejecting people for cohabitation. Actually, our deacon said that if they didn't marry cohabitating couples they wouldn't have too many weddings! I agree it wouldn't hurt to get feedback from people who got married there.

VERY valid point! If churches rejected couples who live together, they'd be out of the wedding business! Unless of course they're kept alive by all of you who lie!!! (Just Kidding!)

smara Posted: Jul 18, 2006 02:38 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Posted by KimAMalone

Posted by EGreene79

But I haven't heard of many places rejecting people for cohabitation. Actually, our deacon said that if they didn't marry cohabitating couples they wouldn't have too many weddings! I agree it wouldn't hurt to get feedback from people who got married there.

VERY valid point! If churches rejected couples who live together, they'd be out of the wedding business! Unless of course they're kept alive by all of you who lie!!! (Just Kidding!)

They didnt reject us for telling the truth but he did grill us and it wasnt fun at all. My Fh was so p!ssed. he is doing the church thing for me and was mad that I made us look like a fool. So just make sure you both are on the same page.

JandJ1224 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 02:56 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

We told the priest we lived together, it was no big deal at all. Pre Cana was even better, every single couple lived together

Shiv Posted: Jul 18, 2006 03:04 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Posted by KimAMalone

We're going to St. Patrick's in Bay Shore... any experiences there?

my friend got married there and they lived together- i think they're ok with it

AMGBride2008 Posted: Jul 18, 2006 03:06 PM

Re: Priest vs. couple living together

Posted by Shiv

Posted by KimAMalone

We're going to St. Patrick's in Bay Shore... any experiences there?

my friend got married there and they lived together- i think they're ok with it

BIIIIIG sign of relief there! Thanks for that!!