proper ettiquete on adressing invitation

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Posted by StacyJill2009

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Posted by CherryBlossombride

Eh!! do what you feel is as least offensive as possible. Personally if they have been together for that long and have children together then I consider them married. Marriage=committment and they sound pretty committed to me. Unless this offends the woman I would address it Mr & Mrs so and so and family.

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I think it is offensive not to use the women's real name...If they are married and she goes by her maiden name professionally then that is a sense of status for her. If they are not married she may not want people to assume they are married.

I find it very offensive if someone refers to me as guest when inviting my fiance or would call me by someone elses last name. I think it means they didn't take the trouble to ask.

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I agree 100%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by CherryBlossombride

Being referred to as 'guest' is offensive if you are someones long time gf or especially fh. As far as the Mr & Ms situation goes. This isn't a 'professional' setting it's an invite to a wedding and I think if this woman is offended by someone calling her the 'Mrs' than I think it's weird because chances are this couples child/children they have together go by the fathers last name. Deciding to get married is a personal decision and sometimes people are 'offended' when you point out they are not married. To each his own. It can go either way.

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I'm confused. Are you saying address the invite Mr .and Mrs. even though they are not married?


ETA: What if the children are not from the Mr.?
What if they are her children?

it is also offensive to address a women by a man's name if she does not use that name...it's like striping someone of their title. There is a reason she wants her own name. You wouldn't take Dr. away from someone and call them Mr.

I can understand making an honest mistake but you if know the situation or don't bother to ask someone and just think it's easier to Mr. and Mrs. that is offensive.

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Posted by StacyJill2009

it is also offensive to address a women by a man's name if she does not use that name...it's like striping someone of their title. There is a reason she wants her own name. You wouldn't take Dr. away from someone and call them Mr.

I can understand making an honest mistake but you if know the situation or don't bother to ask someone and just think it's easier to Mr. and Mrs. that is offensive.

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I totally agree!

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Posted by VickiR510

Are you inviting the children because if so then i say
Mr. John Doe
Mrs. Jane Smith & Family

Unless of course its the female you are friends with then the first name on the first line will be hers. The first name goes seperately on the first line.

the & sign twice is incorrect.

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This is the way to go.

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Posted by CherryBlossombride

She isn't married & that is why she can't use his name legally but I'm sure she gets called MRS. so and so all the time. I doubt it's offensive. It's Desi sister It's funny after all these years (11) you have never had to address an invitation to them as a family. As far as Doctors go which to me is a very strange comparison I call my Dr by their first name (they prefer it). Being a Doctor is a profession not WHO you are its what you do. I'm glad I don't have family who is easily offended.

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It DOES NOT matter legally or not. If you don't address people in the proper way you are taking away THEIR identity. You can not just choose what to call people because you have a 'familiar' relationship with them. Its their name.

Having proper ettiquete is showing respect to others!!!!!

I'm not sure what you're saying about the DR.
If you are going to his office and calling him by his first name... thats up to you.
But when addressing an invitation you should address it:
Dr. and Mrs. Jones
IF they are BOTH DRS. - you can do a few things.
Drs. Jones
Drs. Bill Jones and Sally Jones
Drs. Bill and Sally Jones

It DOES NOT matter legally or not. If you don't address people in the proper way you are taking away THEIR identity. You can not just choose what to call people because you have a 'familiar' relationship with them. Its their name.

Having proper ettiquete is showing respect to others!!!!!

I'm not sure what you're saying about the DR.
If you are going to his office and calling him by his first name... thats up to you.
But when addressing an invitation you should address it:
Dr. and Mrs. Jones
IF they are BOTH DRS. - you can do a few things.
Drs. Jones
Drs. Bill Jones and Sally Jones
Drs. Bill and Sally Jones

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I totally agree!