QOTD- 1/9/13

Ok, it seems as though I am obsessed with money lately. Here's today's question:

How are you handling the finances of wedding planning? Did you and your fiance decide you were going it alone, did family offer, did you ask?

***FH and I originally wanted to pay for everything ourselves and have our parents as honored guests. That isuntl we really started looking and pricey everything. We really didn't think it would be possible to have the wedding of our dreams, even with a 1.5 year engagement. Then my parents sat us down and explained that they did not want us to want for anything so the deal was we would pick everything we wanted and pay what we could and my parents would pay the balance. That is so generous of them and it has (obviously) helped out so much!

Have a great day everyone!

Re: QOTD- 1/9/13

Our parents gave us a little bit of money when we got engaged but it was with the understanding that they weren't really going to help us with a lot of it. We are both from families with three kids and my mom is widowed so that took a financial hit on her otherwise my parents would have paid for a lot of it.... and FH's parents just don't have the money to pay for a lot but they have been helping us here and there. We went into it knowing we are paying for at least 95% of it ourselves, so we sat down together and came up with a budget. I track everything we spend for the wedding and compare it to what we estimated we should spend to try to stay on budget. We think we may have to ask to borrow a little bit once it gets closer, but I'm hoping we don't have to!

QOTD- 1/9/13

All 4 of our parents are contributing, but FMIL has really stepped up to the plate. She has 2 sons (FH brother is a forever bachelor) and said that this is a once in a lifetime thing for HER lol.

With that said its been hard trying to nicely turn down all of her horrible/tacky input lol

Re: QOTD- 1/9/13

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Posted by klk072285

With that said its been hard trying to nicely turn down all of her horrible/tacky input lol

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i can relate!

QOTD- 1/9/13

We're paying for the bulk of the wedding, but my parents and FH's father have been really generous with helping us. FH plan on taking them out to a really nice dinner over the summer to show them our appreciation.

QOTD- 1/9/13

we are paying for the majority ourselves, my mom paid for my dress and will pay for the shower and FH's parents contributed a lump sum of money as well.

QOTD- 1/9/13

We basically just picked the stuff that was important to us(venue,photobooth) and then tried to cut down on other stuff (not getting a specialty limo). We are paying for the bulk of it ourselves. My parents paid for my dress,veil,headband. My parents are buying the favors and my mom is packaging them and they are paying for my shower which will be done at their house. FH parents are not really involved in our lives. I would never ask anyone for money.

Re: QOTD- 1/9/13

We are paying for the wedding ourselves. Our parents would be happy to contribute but they are just not able to. My parents/sisters will be paying for my shower.
I think being an older couple (late 30's), we are in a different position. We both work and have saved money. We are having a small wedding (less than 100) and as a result we can have everything we want within reason.

Re: QOTD- 1/9/13

My parents are covering the cost of the RH, which is HUGE! My mom bought my gown and (as far as I know) is paying for my shower. She also purchased our STD and helped with STD postage...which is another HUGE thing.

My FIL's have NOT offered and it doesn't look like they are going to pay for ANYTHING so EVERYTHING else is on FH and I.

I know this is common but I think it is a little unfair that my FH hasn't asked for anything in life and has gotten nothing where his siblings have gotten birthday parties, showers and graduation parties.

I feel if one child gets something, all the children should get the same treatment.

Sorry, this post is part response and a little venting.

QOTD- 1/9/13

Family offered!

QOTD- 1/9/13

we are paying for the bulk but both sides offered quite a bit of money then also contributed more as 'gifts'

the orignal amounts were offered after we got engaged & before our initial budget conversations. the gifts were after the fact but still helped A LOT

QOTD- 1/9/13

We are paying for almost everything ourselves. My parents really arent in the position to help out fianically If they were they 100% would. My parents did throw us a hudge engagement party and footed the entire bill. My dad wants to pay for my veil and headpeice which is a nice chunck of change and my mom is throwing me a really nice shower! They offered to pay for my dress but i didnt want to be limited in what I wanted because of her budget. FH's parents are divorsed; Is dad isnt around and his mom hasnt offered to pay for anything; so I am pretty suure we will be payinf for the reception dinner. Oh well

Re: QOTD- 1/9/13

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Posted by JojoBride

My parents are covering the cost of the RH, which is HUGE! My mom bought my gown and (as far as I know) is paying for my shower. She also purchased our STD and helped with STD postage...which is another HUGE thing.

My FIL's have NOT offered and it doesn't look like they are going to pay for ANYTHING so EVERYTHING else is on FH and I.

I know this is common but I think it is a little unfair that my FH hasn't asked for anything in life and has gotten nothing where his siblings have gotten birthday parties, showers and graduation parties.

I feel if one child gets something, all the children should get the same treatment.

Sorry, this post is part response and a little venting.

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No worries! One of the reasons I asked the question was to allow us to vent a bit. I'm in a similar situation. FFIL gave his daughter (FSIL) money towards her wedding, we don't know the number but we know it happened. He never once mentioned money until about a week before the e-party. He asked 'what we wanted', for him to pay for something for the pary or as a gift. FH told him it didn't matter so we got a check in a card that night. My parents and FH and I paid for everything (mostly my parents) who are also primarily paying for RH and many other things (my dress and veil for instance). I hate that money causes such friction and frustration but when we went to our tasting, FFIL sat next to my father bragging about how he got money from his retirement and disability and bought a new motorcycle and upgrade the sound system etc. He also kept talking about his daughter's tasting a year earlier. Took lots of strength for my father not to lose it! FFILs truck broke down about a month ago and instead of buying a used car to replace it, he bought a 2013 truck, brand new. FH usually keeps his cool but he had a moment over the holiday week. Not that we are expecting all this money from everyone, but my parents are juggling money around to allow us to not want for anything and to help make our wedding dreams come true. Deep breath!

QOTD- 1/9/13

We're paying for the wedding together with my mother. She has been a big help. She also paid for my dress. His parents have said that they will contribute but we haven't received anything from them yet. His step grandmother just passed away so I'm not sure if we will receive anything at this point Furthermore, some people in my family have offered to contribute.