Do you think it’s healthy to verbally fight /argue ? How much is too much? Do you and FH settle your arguments quickly? Who apologizes first or is it both?
My Answer: I think it is very healthyto argue about certain things and get steam out as long as it doesnt hurt the other person too much. it has to be done in a mature and respectful way. It is not healthy to bottle things inside.
As for me and FH, w do bicker about stupid stuff and he tends to fogive and forget quickly while I dont. I def need to work on this!
FutureJOC
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I think it is totally healthy and necessary to have verbal arguments as opposed to keeping feelings locked inside and letting them affect how you treat each other.
When FH and I first started dating we made an agreement to be brutually honest with one another. If either one of us had something to get off our chests or if there was an issue one of us felt needed to be discuss we'd come right out and tell each other, even if there was a chance what the person said might hurt the other one's feelings. I especially have learned from past relationships that holding how you feel in drastically affects your relationship and causes people to drift away or do something they never thought they would do. FH and I don't want this happening with one another.
I wouldn't say this happens often with us and when it does it really isn't anything major but when we don't necessarily argue like yell at each other. We both address each other calmly, we take time to listen to what the other has to say and then either solve the issue or just agree to disagree.
mollygurl24
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I actually don't argue with my fiance all that much. I think we had two arguments, but never over anything silly. Whenever something bothers the one of us, we try to immediately tell the other person. It really doesn't turn to argument. We each say our piece, and one of us apologizes. But I will give him credit, because he is super mature about things, and has taught me to be. I used to be (in prior relationships) the type to bottle everything up inside and when we would get into an argument, let everything out, which never ended well.
GlitterBox24
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Do you think it’s healthy to verbally fight /argue ?
Yes it is, we do argue, but no curse words. I dont curse at all actually, my favorite word to use is freaking instead of ya know what. So we can bicker, scream whatever, but neither of us curse at each other.
How much is too much? Fighting every other day,
Do you and FH settle your arguments quickly? Yes
Who apologizes first or is it both? Usually Me... hahaha!
allornil
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Do you think it’s healthy to verbally fight /argue ?
I think it's better than seething and then exploding, Trust me. It's not pretty. People's feeling get hurt and it just goes on and on and on that way without anything being resolved.
How much is too much?
I guess if its more than not. I know when we have money stress we bicker like crazy. Everything bugs us. When things even out, we seem to get long fine. At least I know we can weather any storm bc we've been through so many over theyears.
Do you and FH settle your arguments quickly?
usually unless it's something that isn't easily resolved.
Who apologizes first or is it both?
That would be me. I tend to be a soother and sometimes it gets to me, like hello..why am i always making you feel better?
FH and I have been together forever. We've been living together forever too. I know some couples argue more than others. I think we're in the middle. Everyone thinks we're perfect and that bugs me. We're so not but it's nice to know others think we're a good match just like we do.
jwleewedding
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i think it's completely healthy to fight every so often.. as long as both parties know at the end that it's just a fight and nothing else.
chreesta
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Posted by adelya21 Do you think it’s healthy to verbally fight /argue ? How much is too much? Do you and FH settle your arguments quickly? Who apologizes first or is it both?
I definitely think it is healthy to argue instead of holding it in.
If all you do is fight, there is obviously a problem.
We usually settle our arguments quickly. No one in particular apologizes because we usually realize we are being silly and one of us will crack a joke and it will be done.
Moonmist09
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i think it is healthy to fight once in a while in a relationship. i don't think its healthy when every little thing escalates into an argument. fh and i hardly ever argue and sometimes we will get annoyed quickly at life, not necessrily at each other if we had a bad day at work or something, but we're both just so laid back that we really don't let too much bother us.
i don't even remember who said i'm sorry first since our last fight was so long ago. i guess depending on how the situation is, would depend on who would say it first.
WeezyGirl2354
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It's def healthy - but it all counts on how you do it. It's not healthy to keep things in but getting nasty, calling names and that sorta stuff is just not going to fix anything.
We are all human and all hit a breaking point - also as women we have PMS lol
so yea i think its healthy as long as it done in a healthy way
lau11888
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I definitely think its normal and healthy to argue sometimes in a relationship. I actually find it a little strange not too. In the beginning FH and I neverrrr argued. Then we came to a 2 month period where we argued almost everyday. (This was also when I lived in Alaska with him and had no car, no friends and no job and he worked all day. Which made me slightly cranky. ) Since then we have very minimal arguements and he usually forgives and forgets, I tend to hold grudges which I swear I'm trying to work on!
anszusterman
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FHs family communicates through confrontation- so he LOVES to fight (but he doesn't see it as fighting). Over time I have trained him to accept there are going to be times when we will just have to agree- to -disagree. We also have one of those brutally honest relationships, so there are no secret issues between us.
We never actually say we're sorry- its more an understanding and a certain kind of smile
angelabarra12
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i def think its okay to argue! in any relationship actually because i am not someone who believes its okay to holds things in. If something bothering me or fh i want him to tell me bc if not i feel like it only makes things worse and how will i know hes upset and to try and fix whats wrong. My FH says this is also the socialworker in me but i cant help it. lol im always like tlel me how you feel babe and hes like im not one of your kids!! haha oh boy...but yes i think arguing is normal and of course if you not killing each other. everyone knows whats right for them and their relationship! some people may not fight at all more power to u, lol less stress for you!
evita2781
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It's def ok - you have to express what you're feeling otherwise all this tension will build up and it'll turn into one big fight. I used to be very bad w/ settling arguments and was stubborn but FH helped me get over that and now we discuss any issues ASAP - and I love it b/c I hate it when we're mad at each other (which is not often ) And i'm pretty bad at apologizing at first but again, FH told me that he can't always be apologizing first esp if i'm at fault...oh FH
Ang9483
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I think that when you don't fight something is wrong. Keeping things inside is no good and ends up in huge blowouts. Fighting and arguing about things shows you are comfortable enough to be yourself and express what it is that is bothering you.
We have little bickers about things we don't really have HUGE blowouts. We both are stubborn and hate to admit when we are wrong so our fights usually just end with one of us finally giving in and just ending it. Sometimes we disagree on the most stupidest things lol. Its like why did we eve start this
VCanizalez
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Do you think it’s healthy to verbally fight /argue ?
Yes.. it is healthy to argue. I think it def. helps the relationship to grow stronger because u are overcoming those little/big obstacles...
How much is too much? If you Fight Everyday.. or If you fight for NO REASON
Do you and FH settle your arguments quickly?
Yes We do... We talk about right away... but our problems are solve within the same hour tops. We have never been mad over a day or I'll say not even more than 1hour..
Who apologizes first or is it both? It is Both of us most of the time. We think a relationship is base in two people so we should both do it... UNLESS he has done something then He apoligizes Right away... if I do something, It takes me a little bit longer but I apologize...
ness83
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Notwedyet08
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It's agree-arguing is healthy. No two people are the same; and at some point we're going to disagree on something.
Similar to a Prior post-i also used to bottle up my feelings and then we'd be disagreeing on some random topic then BAM i'd be brining up things from the past that bothered me & i'd explode.
I don't curse; and hardly yell; but we do argue/disagree. FH gets over it fast; but i have a hard time moving on (need to work on this).
ElovesJ117
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FH and I argue and I think its very healthy for a relationship. Most of the time an argument is over something someone is upset about so if you didn't talk about it 1 - the other person wouldn't know that it is a problem and 2 - it would just build up inside.
Arguing more than not arguing is to much. Honestly, in my relationship I am the talking. I can very easily verbalize how I am feeling. FH has a harder time at it so I often find myself talking more and trying to get FH to express what wrong. In the end, I don't think one of us apologizes more. Of course depending on the situation usually the end result is a plan on how to fix whatever we were arguing about.
MissingLI
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FH and I really don't argue because we discuss things in the moment. Meaning if something happens that I didn't like or he didn't like, or some action was done we discuss it right then and there. So we never really argue. We did agree that we are both the type of people that if we did get into a really heated arguement that it is ok to walk away, collect your thoughts, and re-visit. I am the type of person that would rather have a few moments to myself to really get to the heart of the matter and really understand WHY something is upsetting me so it can be discussed rationally, rather than just blowing up for no good reason.
LoveyDovey
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of course FH & I fight...we bicker more than anything, and its alwaysss about the same stuff... CLEANING! lol
major fights happen too but not too much
you have to argue, it shows that you are two individuals...and its healthy and very very normal... you are two people sharing a life together...arguments are bound to happen!
its healthy as long as no one is getting hurt and as long it remains and exchange of ideas and not an exchange of insults
FH normally apologizes first...but it depends on who is wrong...we both promised to always settle our issues and never let anything linger too long
