Our fiancés can bring out the best (and worst) of us. How has being in a relationship with FH changed you or what has it taught you about yourself?
FH has taught me that I don’t have to fight and yell and scream to prove how much I love him. In my family ... growing up... the louder my mother yelled meant she REALLY loved and cared about me (a$$backward italians LOL) He has taught me that it really doesn’t have to be THAT hard or THAT dramatic. He doesn't LET me fight. He is STILL trying to convince me that there doesnt NEED to be a problem. That we really ARE that great of a couple and there doesnt NEED to be a problem with us. He has definitely calmed me down with a lot of things and I don’t freak out about the small stuff as much as I used to.
ladygoodman
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
Fh has taught me how to just relax and let things be. Ok it's still a work in progress haha. But I also grew up with a loud confrontational mother and we've butted heads a lot. Fh has witnessed some crazy fights but in the recent past I've just been letting my mom say her peace and yessing her to death. It's definitely a change for the better.
Simonenarissa
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
Good question :)
When FH and I started dating I had a pre conceived idea that all relationships had to be a little hard, that there was no perfect guy on the entire world (based on my older sisters relationships that I always watched and my relationship right before FH) so FH definitely had to teach me that he wasn't lying when he said nice things, that he actually meant them and he was a nice guy and what he said and what he meant were the same things (that I didn't have to figure out what was really going on bc it was all just out in the open already) And similar to what katielynn said, things don't always have to be so dramatic and big.. If there's an issue. We TALK it out, not yell it out. We tell each other no were feeling instead of pointing fingers- he taught me, by not accepting what I had always done, that yelling and fighting isn't a necessary part of a relationship. He made me calmer.
cj52514
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Re: **QOTD 3.5.13**
hmm...I would say 2 majors things
1) Before FH I thought that relationships had to be all dramatic and intense (what I was used to) and that love equated to an emotional rollercoaster. It actually threw me for a loop (ha - no pun intended!) when I met FH because our relationship was calm. I thought because it was calm (without all the drama)that I didn't have strong enough feelings for him and actually tried breaking up with him twice!
2) I have a bit of a quick temper and can get snippy (my hot Italian temper lol).FH learned that sometimes I just need to snap a little and then I calm down right away. When I saw that he was willing to just let me vent, I learned that he's such a patient guy who doesn't deserve that, so I've definitely been trying to mellow out. Although, that's easier said than done!
RoandJoe
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Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
It seems we all have the same thing in common. I rarely 'fight' with FH because we just don't let it happen. We calmly say what needs to be said and come to a resolution. I used to be so quick to fly off the handle with everyone in my life-including family. He has taught me that things CAN indeed be resolved without screaming. He also taught me to be a bit more organized and tidy. I'm more of an all over the place kind of person, but he is a list maker and a cleaner. He actually taught me to really budget my money instead of just check my bank account to see what the balance is. If I didn't have him during the wedding planning process, it would be a disaster!
bridejackson22
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
Wow I am not alone with the confrontational mother thing. My fh did not grow up with a mom like mine so of course all my relationships before him were yelling intense emtional roller coaster love hate relationships. FH is very laid back and not confrontational and has rubbed off on me, he brings a calmness to me. We work really well as a team and are on the same page which is probably why none of my past relationships ever panned out cause we were never on the same page and being the way I grew up I pushed people to try to be on the same page and if they didnt it would be a problem....I sound like my mother lol. My fh woke my up from falling into those patterns and I thank god for him from saving me from that.
Soon2BeMrsPy
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Re: **QOTD 3.5.13**
Being with FH has made me a better person, hands down. I could care less about useless crap and no matter what the situation is I know I have a wonderful man and am building a life with him, that is all that matters.
Since being with him there have been so many aspects of my life that I have learned to calm down, let it roll of my back or just take the high road. He and I are pretty similar in how we are giving souls and have been taken advantage more often than we would like to admit but being together we have put ourselves first and it has made a significant difference. As my mom says 'you two are the book, everyone else are just chapters' It may sound silly but she told me that when I was having serious drama with my sister and her power play of her thinking she should be the priority in my life. I love FH more than anything
Teampuppy
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Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
I still have a little of my attitude here and there but FH has definitely helped me calm down.
Also, I love that we do everything as a team and if we would have an argument we talk it over right after and right back to normal. We don't let it go and dwell on it. We talk about everything and work on what to do to prevent them.
sgf2
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
This is a GREAT question!!
FH has taught me me I don't always need to get my way for things to go right. I am obsessive compulsive about a lot of things, and he's helped me let go of a lot of that. He's also shown me that we don't need to have a stressful dramatic relationship to prove how much we love each other.
LadyReeRee
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
FH has taught me how to not be such a B all the time lol. But seriously, he's taught me that I need to calm down when my emotions get the best of me. Also, the fact that I'm not always right.
Stine Bean
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Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
FH has taught me to be confident with my decisions and to stop second guessing myself all the time. Also, I'm a worrier and he always tells me that as long as I've tried my hardest, what's done is done and worrying about it won't change anything. I've seriously become less stressed since being with him. That's for sure!
1) Before FH I thought that relationships had to be all dramatic and intense (what I was used to) and that love equated to an emotional rollercoaster. It actually threw me for a loop (ha - no pun intended!) when I met FH because our relationship was calm. I thought because it was calm (without all the drama)that I didn't have strong enough feelings for him and actually tried breaking up with him twice!
THIS!! OMG... last summer I was mad at FH and I called him up angry and crying and I was being SUCH a drama queen... and he's like.. I dont know why you're acting like this... and I was like FINE. If you don't know why I'm acting like this then just break up with me because clearly you don't know me! And he was like. NO. Stop it. I'm not fighting with you. I'm not breaking up with you.
I was like.... OMG. what IS this?!?!
Alyssa M
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
I have to agree with basically everyone here and say that I am much calmer now. My family can definitely get under my skin and bring out the worst in me sometimes but he's really helped me to chill out a bit.
I didn't know what a normal relationship was until FH. I was always anxious and jealous and there were nonstop fights, now when I think back I have to laugh because I was cahhrazzyyy it's nice to be in a normal, stable relationship isn't it ladies??
ASemderWedding
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
I thought about this question all day, trying to analyze our relationship! I think the biggest thing is not throwing empty threats in when fighting. That use to be my go to in the beginning, stuff like 'if you don't stop it I'm leaving and never coming back', even though we both know I didn't mean it. The other thing was probably standing up for myself and the things I liked or wanted. I come from a very opinionated family, and I would constantly go into passive mode to appease them. Not anymore :)
NIKOLE
Posted:
Member since
**QOTD 3.5.13**
HA! FH is trying to teach me to be less insane...After seven years it hasn't worked!! I'm just so irrational!!
Delgie
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Re: **QOTD 3.5.13**
Posted by LadyReeRee
FH has taught me how to not be such a B all the time lol. But seriously, he's taught me that I need to calm down when my emotions get the best of me. Also, the fact that I'm not always right.
Haha! This exactly! He's also taught me how to manage my money better.
mmordocco
Posted:
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Re: **QOTD 3.5.13**
My FH has taught me a lot. He is so family oriented and seeing his loyalty and relationship with his family has inspired me to develop a closer relationship with mine. Before FH, I was cycling through a lot of abusive relationships. FH taught me to not be so codependent and that I deserve to be treated with respect. FH has never once raised his voice to me or called me a foul name. He has never disrespected me in any way... and has treated me differently than anyone else ever has. He refuses to argue about anything and is excellent at communicating his feelings without ever offending me or upsetting me. He has planned his life out with me and I always know what to expect from him. We laugh every single day together. If I ever start nagging or getting into one of my 'moods' he shoots me a smile and we just start laughing. I can never be annoyed with him for more than 5 minutes!!! He has inspires me (and still does) to be the best I can be and work to my fullest potential. He makes me want to better myself everyday so that we can live our lives comfortably together. We have so many goals and dreams for our future together. I have never met a man like him and I couldn't imagine my life with anyone else~!!!
MsErikaLynn
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Re: **QOTD 3.5.13**
we bring out the focus in one another. we will set a goal and go go go until it's met, passed, and we can achieve something else. and we've both brought out the 'family' person in one another too. working hard for the life we want :)
Soon2BeMrsPy
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Member since
Re: **QOTD 3.5.13**
Posted by mmordocco
My FH has taught me a lot. He is so family oriented and seeing his loyalty and relationship with his family has inspired me to develop a closer relationship with mine. Before FH, I was cycling through a lot of abusive relationships. FH taught me to not be so codependent and that I deserve to be treated with respect. FH has never once raised his voice to me or called me a foul name. He has never disrespected me in any way... and has treated me differently than anyone else ever has. He refuses to argue about anything and is excellent at communicating his feelings without ever offending me or upsetting me. He has planned his life out with me and I always know what to expect from him. We laugh every single day together. If I ever start nagging or getting into one of my 'moods' he shoots me a smile and we just start laughing. I can never be annoyed with him for more than 5 minutes!!! He has inspires me (and still does) to be the best I can be and work to my fullest potential. He makes me want to better myself everyday so that we can live our lives comfortably together. We have so many goals and dreams for our future together. I have never met a man like him and I couldn't imagine my life with anyone else~!!!
I can totally relate to this post & sounds just like my FH too! It is amazing how one man can completely change your entire life so immensely.
