QOTD 7.18.09

The divorse rate now adays is crazy. My parents are divorced and basically my whole dads side of the family. LIke all of you Im confident we have what it take to make our marriage work and last. My question today is what is it about your relationship with FH that makes you guys work??


oh and ps HAPPY FRIDAY WOOHOO!!!!!!!1

Funny you should ask this question FH's cousin is getting divorced & when we found out why we were discussing it. I know our marriage will work for many reasons.

1. We are always honest with one another
2. Respect for each other is immense!
3. Our communication is so great. we really worked hard on this & the result is amazing!
4. TRUST! We trust each other to no end.
5. Listening! We actually listen & hear what each other is saying.
6. We LOVE each other to much!


Being with FH for 5 years strong really has its benefits. We really learned to listen & communicate on a more deeper level.

---

Posted by VickiR510

Funny you should ask this question FH's cousin is getting divorced & when we found out why we were discussing it. I know our marriage will work for many reasons.

1. We are always honest with one another
2. Respect for each other is immense!
3. Our communication is so great. we really worked hard on this & the result is amazing!
4. TRUST! We trust each other to no end.
5. Listening! We actually listen & hear what each other is saying.
6. We LOVE each other to much!


Being with FH for 5 years strong really has its benefits. We really learned to listen & communicate on a more deeper level.

---

I agree with you 100% Vicki! Me and FH have been together for 5 years also.

---

Posted by little34

I think our ability to look out for one another and be honest with one another and our communication is great.... and I really think being together for 12 years helps a lot....we have been through EVERYTHING together!!!!

---

Ditto except we been together 8 years. We really understand each other and are 100% honest with each other.

Here is something someone posted awhile back!!

Here are some tips given by couples whose marriages are strong
and healthy. Follow them, adapt them to work in your own
marriage, and you'll be on your way to having what we all want --
a happy marriage!

1. Communicate. It's important that you keep the lines of
communication open. Especially when things go wrong. There are
so many outside influences that can affect a marriage -- jobs,
family, friends, hobbies, education, church. If you're suddenly
not being able to spend time together, or you're fighting about
money, it's especially important to talk about what's going on.


2. Listen. It's a sad fact that we are often more polite to
strangers than we are to the people we love the most. If your
spouse is trying to talk to you, whether it's to find out what
you want for dinner, to tell you about their day, or to discuss a
problem in your marriage, give them the same courtesy you'd give
a complete stranger, and LISTEN! Don't try to finish their
sentences, don't try to solve their problems, and don't ever say,
'I told you so!' Here's an especially apt poem, written by Ogden
Nash:

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you’re wrong, admit it;
Whenever you’re right, shut up.

3. Create rituals and family traditions. Every successful couple
has their own private rituals - things they do that has a special
meaning just to them. So whether it's getting your spouse coffee
every morning, a special touch that means 'I love you', or
creating couple signals for 'Let's get out of here, or 'No, I
don't want to buy a timeshare for $95,000!' find your own.
Remember some of your favorite childhood family traditions, and
incorporate them or start new ones in your own couple. Someday,
you'll look back on each time as a treasured memory.

4. Go on a date. Couples who have been together for thirty,
forty and even fifty years or more say that one of the things
that has kept their marriage strong is going out on a 'date' with
their spouse on a regular basis. If money is tight, try taking a
walk together, going to a dollar movie, or even to a drive-in.
Spending quality 'couple-time' helps to reinforce the special
feelings that made you fall in love with each other in the first
place.

5. Agree on money matters early. Amazingly, many couples never
discuss money except in the most superficial ways until after
they're married. One of the leading causes of arguments in
marriages is because of a difference in how money is handled in
the couple. Before you walk down the isle, discuss your feelings
about things like credit, paying bills and saving money. Talk
about how you will pay expenses, and who will handle the money.
Finding out after the fact that you have major differences is
only going to lead to long term problems.

6. Love and Respect. No matter what happens outside of your
marriage, it's vital that you and your spouse always treat each
other with love and respect. There are some simple rules that
have worked for couples for the last 80 years that still apply
today. They include: Never go to bed angry. Kiss each other
every time you come home, or before going out. Say 'I love you'
every single day. Mind your manners, and say 'Please' and
'Thank-you'. Do something for the one you love every day. Just
because. Occasionally write love letters to each other. Laugh at
his/her jokes, no matter how bad they are, or how often you've
heard them. Don't sweat the little things. Try something new once
in a while.

7. Maintain a commitment to your marriage. This can be especially
difficult today, but it's important that you put your marriage
first. If you're committed to making your marriage a success, and
you know that your partner shares your commitment, there's
nothing that the two of you can't accomplish.

---

Posted by Jayla127

Here is something someone posted awhile back!!

Here are some tips given by couples whose marriages are strong
and healthy. Follow them, adapt them to work in your own
marriage, and you'll be on your way to having what we all want --
a happy marriage!

1. Communicate. It's important that you keep the lines of
communication open. Especially when things go wrong. There are
so many outside influences that can affect a marriage -- jobs,
family, friends, hobbies, education, church. If you're suddenly
not being able to spend time together, or you're fighting about
money, it's especially important to talk about what's going on.


2. Listen. It's a sad fact that we are often more polite to
strangers than we are to the people we love the most. If your
spouse is trying to talk to you, whether it's to find out what
you want for dinner, to tell you about their day, or to discuss a
problem in your marriage, give them the same courtesy you'd give
a complete stranger, and LISTEN! Don't try to finish their
sentences, don't try to solve their problems, and don't ever say,
'I told you so!' Here's an especially apt poem, written by Ogden
Nash:

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you’re wrong, admit it;
Whenever you’re right, shut up.

3. Create rituals and family traditions. Every successful couple
has their own private rituals - things they do that has a special
meaning just to them. So whether it's getting your spouse coffee
every morning, a special touch that means 'I love you', or
creating couple signals for 'Let's get out of here, or 'No, I
don't want to buy a timeshare for $95,000!' find your own.
Remember some of your favorite childhood family traditions, and
incorporate them or start new ones in your own couple. Someday,
you'll look back on each time as a treasured memory.

4. Go on a date. Couples who have been together for thirty,
forty and even fifty years or more say that one of the things
that has kept their marriage strong is going out on a 'date' with
their spouse on a regular basis. If money is tight, try taking a
walk together, going to a dollar movie, or even to a drive-in.
Spending quality 'couple-time' helps to reinforce the special
feelings that made you fall in love with each other in the first
place.

5. Agree on money matters early. Amazingly, many couples never
discuss money except in the most superficial ways until after
they're married. One of the leading causes of arguments in
marriages is because of a difference in how money is handled in
the couple. Before you walk down the isle, discuss your feelings
about things like credit, paying bills and saving money. Talk
about how you will pay expenses, and who will handle the money.
Finding out after the fact that you have major differences is
only going to lead to long term problems.

6. Love and Respect. No matter what happens outside of your
marriage, it's vital that you and your spouse always treat each
other with love and respect. There are some simple rules that
have worked for couples for the last 80 years that still apply
today. They include: Never go to bed angry. Kiss each other
every time you come home, or before going out. Say 'I love you'
every single day. Mind your manners, and say 'Please' and
'Thank-you'. Do something for the one you love every day. Just
because. Occasionally write love letters to each other. Laugh at
his/her jokes, no matter how bad they are, or how often you've
heard them. Don't sweat the little things. Try something new once
in a while.

7. Maintain a commitment to your marriage. This can be especially
difficult today, but it's important that you put your marriage
first. If you're committed to making your marriage a success, and
you know that your partner shares your commitment, there's
nothing that the two of you can't accomplish.

---

tHIS IS GREAT THANKS FOR REPOSTING THAT. i TOTALLY AGREE!

---

Posted by cedesnyc

My FH and I talk about things all the time even the really rough and touchy topics. We believe in meeing in the middle when we can't agree on something. We both come from strong family values as none of our parents are divorce and hope, if God willing, that we will continue on to that route.

---

Us too.....I feel that no matter how tough things can get, there is always a way to reslove it. Both of our parents did it - mine are married 35yrs and his 45ys!

A lot of people think divorce is the answer to a lot of problems. Don't get me wrong - no one is 'trapped' into being in something they dont want, so yes divorceis always there, but I feel cheating is the only thing I feel causes for a divorce.

---

Posted by chicky724

We don’t let the small things bother us… when we fight we usually make up within like half an hour!

---

I agree with this 100%! FH and I do get into our arguments here and there but we are always quick to make up. We have a house rule and that is 'never go to bed angry'. No matter what happens, our issues must be resolved and settled that day and I really think that helps make us stronger..

He's my best friend and we always want to be together and make things work. There is not one day that goes by

that I think I don't want to spend time with him. However, who am I to say that things won't go wrong. My parents are divorced and I would NEVER want to get divorced, but do you think people who get divorced actually get married thinking, hey we might get divorced one day. No one ever expects it, but sometimes sh*t happens. You can't predict what will happen down the line...