I've learned a lot about what NOT to do in a marriage. I guess I tend to focus on the negatives with my parents relationship. Don't get me wrong, they're great and they've been married for holy CRAAAP!!! 43 years!!!!!! I guess I never really see the more personal, caring side of their relationship, that's why. FH's parents ..... forget that. They are the epitome of what not to do (they're divorced now).
wow ITA!
my parents are going on 40 years and i never see them affectionate or anything. i did see them a few months back holding hands and i was shocked and it did make me smile.
FH's parents are divorced and FMIL has been married 3 times already since . FFIL is awesome and has an amazing wife
Rosie0613
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
Absolutely. I learned what I don't want in my marriage. My parents have been married for almost 30 years but the stuff that my mother puts up with is not fair. She has just now started standing up for herself. She tells me all the time what regrets she has. I do not want to be passive like she was all these years and have regrets years later. My parents marriage has not always been a happy one and though I know that things aren't going to be picture perfect everyday with FH, I know that I do not want to have the relationship my parents have. Their relationship with each other has affected the relationship my brothers and I have with them as well. I don't want my kids to be put in the middle of our disagreements like my parents throw us in the middle.
T E R I
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
From my parents, I learned what not to do, they had a very strange relationship and when I was younger it seemed semi-normal to me, but I didn't realize until I got older how strange it was. My father wasn't around too often when I was a kid and when he was around, my mother always wanted to please him and us kids were suppose to do the same-but I was the one that always said eff that, even when I was a kid I knew it was wrong to have to please people.
FH's parents have a great marriage and are still going strong, they have ups and downs, but are still great
xela
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
My mother picked losers...first my father and now her current husband...not sure whos worse. So I def learned from her how I didnt want to be treated.
flibbertigibbet
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
Being a child of divorced parents makes me want to work harder to have a strong healthy marriage and not get a divorce!
ITA
i think a lot of people don't accept the fact that a marriage is supposed to be hard at times. you say 'in good times and in bad' for a REASON.
there should be plenty of good but you have to WORK at getting through the bad.
people are lazy today i think. not willing to work through bad times and just take the easy way out.
obviously thats not the case for all situations but for so many.
having a strong marriage is a great accomplishment.
tmcnair414
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
Nope, my mom never got married.
Relish21
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
Yes.... when he does something I don't like I tend to say... My dad would NEVER say that to My MOM!!!! You're A JERK!!!!!
it usually works!
My parents have the perfect relationship..... he worships her!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's adorable!
scatteredx12
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
definitely. my parents have been married for 30 years and fh's parents for 26 years. both of our parents are still happy and very playful with each other in front of the families, and our dads both spoil our moms and are just extremely similar in so many ways. it's awesome to see two great examples of wonderful relationships that still love each other so much and work through everything together.
Nina1010
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
Definitely...they were not perfect people, but they were real and their love was unconditional. Sometimes romantic, but def not a Disney romanticized love affair. I Know FH and I have more romance but our foundation is solid like my parents' relationship.
Golden
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
My parents divorced when I was two and I think that caused me a little skeptical about relationships but I thank God for the awesome man in my life that has changed my perspective...
luvly73
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
DEFINITELY!!! My parent's relationship is definitely an inspiration and I have always been able to look up to them in this aspect...I only hope we can be as supportive of another as they are
es2189
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
Totally!! My relationship is very similar to my parents' relationship...we even fight about the same things. I know it's weird, but it's how it's turned out. It's not a bad thing, though, since my parents just celebrated their 30th anniversary and they're totally in love!
FutureMrsK10110
Posted:
Member since
Re: *****~~~~~~~~QOTD~~11/19/09~~~~********
I know my parents relationships have affected my relationship. My parents divorced when I was 2 and I've lived with my mother all my life. At about 3 she started a 10 year relationship with my sisters father and they argued a lot and I always knew that I did not want to be with someone that I argued with constantly about the most minor things. I met my father when I was 10 and he's been with the same woman for the last 13 years. They have a pretty good relationship. I've seen the good and the bad and I've always known what I wanted and I'm very lucky to have found him.
