My FI and i didnt have an e-party. Therefore we only got e-gifts from grandparents and aunts/uncles which in all honesty was SO much appreciated and not necessary!
Anyway, my question is, FI's cousin is engaged and having an e-party and i feel like we shouldnt have to give anything. We didnt recieve anything from them. I refuse to give someone a e-gift just bc theyre having a party. I feel Ishould give someone a gift bc I WANT to. Not bc theyre having a party!
Thoughts????
Jen2999
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Gifts are not expected at e parties as far as etiquette says, but I thin it would depend on the type of party and so forth.
We are having a backyard bbq on sunday for our e party and I told many friends no gifts neccesary
Rebecca B
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I think you certainly don't have to give a gift but I think you should do something if you go to the party..gift card...gift from a registry, etc...I would feel funny going to a party like that and not bringing anything...Do you want to give something...it seems like you don't because they didn't give you a gift...(I don't mean to sound like a jerk!!) :)
ChrissynRicky
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kissy27
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Honestly I can see where you are coming from, but you guys decided to not have a party. Of course whether or not you have a party, there will always be people that give you something.
If you plan on attending their e-party, it is only common courtesy to bring a gift! That is like going to a birthday party & showing up empty handed. You just would not do that! No one is saying you have to spend a ton of money, but you have to bring them something
SIBride06
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Posted by ChristineAE
Michelle,
I'm going to cut the BS out for you....you chose not to have a party and people chose to give you gifts...
However, the other couple is having a party, and it's etiquette to give them something - gift or money...now, if you choose not to go - then you are of coruse not obligated to give them anything, but you can't go to the EParty and NOT give something - it's just wrong.
Just put yourself in their shoes - if you threw a party, and a guest came and didn't give you anything - you'd be fuming...
The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding which I personally think is BS, and that's why I'm so against EParties (how many times do we really need to celebrate someone's path in life now????) I'd suck it up, give them something if YOU ARE going to the Party. If you're not - F.It...
Michele:
I couldn't agree more with Christine.
AlliNMatt06
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I didn't have an E-party either. My mom thinks they are wrong. People gave me gifts though. In my opinion I would give a gift. You didn't have a party, so I don't think this couple really thought about giving you a gift or not giving you one. Almost all my gifts were from aunts and uncles, no cousins.
hmpena
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Posted by SIBride06
Posted by ChristineAE
Michelle,
I'm going to cut the BS out for you....you chose not to have a party and people chose to give you gifts...
However, the other couple is having a party, and it's etiquette to give them something - gift or money...now, if you choose not to go - then you are of coruse not obligated to give them anything, but you can't go to the EParty and NOT give something - it's just wrong.
Just put yourself in their shoes - if you threw a party, and a guest came and didn't give you anything - you'd be fuming...
The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding which I personally think is BS, and that's why I'm so against EParties (how many times do we really need to celebrate someone's path in life now????) I'd suck it up, give them something if YOU ARE going to the Party. If you're not - F.It...
Michele:
I couldn't agree more with Christine.
I also must say I agree. I had a guest come to my party and she didn't bring anything. She then had a baby shower, and although she didn't bring anything, I still brought a gift. Don't knock yourself out with a gift. However, I think you should bring something.
KarAnthony
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Posted by ChristineAE
Michelle,
I'm going to cut the BS out for you....you chose not to have a party and people chose to give you gifts...
However, the other couple is having a party, and it's etiquette to give them something - gift or money...now, if you choose not to go - then you are of coruse not obligated to give them anything, but you can't go to the EParty and NOT give something - it's just wrong.
Just put yourself in their shoes - if you threw a party, and a guest came and didn't give you anything - you'd be fuming...
The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding which I personally think is BS, and that's why I'm so against EParties (how many times do we really need to celebrate someone's path in life now????) I'd suck it up, give them something if YOU ARE going to the Party. If you're not - F.It...
Well said!! If you attend a party you should give a gift. They threw the party and it is common courtesy
SuzBride
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Even though technically gifts are not required for an eparty, I would definitely bring a gift if one of my cousins got engaged (independent of if they got me a gift or not). I would just not feel right going to an eparty and not bringing a gift, even if it is something small it will show you care.
(I'm a gift giver though, so I will get all my cousins gifts when they get engaged even if they don't have parties!)
JessicaM.
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two of my first cousins got engaged right around the same time as I did. they both had e-parties...I gave them $50 each. I didn't have an e-party- I got squat....worse part is...they are getting help from their mom (and/or a HUGE gift) and we are paying for this shindig ourselves completely and are NOT expecting any huge endowments come wedding time.
is it irksome...yes, sometimes....but it's not really their fault....take the high road and give them at least a little something.
eta- we didn't even receive anything on sunday at our GTG from our own immediate family...and we paid for everything we had there ourselves too!
AND...their mom (the are brother and sister, got engaged a few months of each other) hosted both parties
MayBride06
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Posted by SIBride06
Posted by ChristineAE
Michelle,
I'm going to cut the BS out for you....you chose not to have a party and people chose to give you gifts...
However, the other couple is having a party, and it's etiquette to give them something - gift or money...now, if you choose not to go - then you are of coruse not obligated to give them anything, but you can't go to the EParty and NOT give something - it's just wrong.
Just put yourself in their shoes - if you threw a party, and a guest came and didn't give you anything - you'd be fuming...
The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding which I personally think is BS, and that's why I'm so against EParties (how many times do we really need to celebrate someone's path in life now????) I'd suck it up, give them something if YOU ARE going to the Party. If you're not - F.It...
Michele:
I couldn't agree more with Christine.
i agree!
Jennie0898
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I would say if you don't want to give a gift don't go to the party.
Even though technically it is proper etiquette to NOT give gifts at an e-party it is just NOT common these days to show up to an e-party empty handed.
You chose not to have an e-party (thus not getting as many gifts) which is fine but this couple chose to have one and I don't think it's fair to hold that against them b/c they didn't give you a gift. If you wanted gifts then you should have had an e-party.
CC59
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Go to the dollar store and get them a lovely picture frame ha ha!!!!
chikita315
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Posted by ChristineAE
Michelle,
I'm going to cut the BS out for you....you chose not to have a party and people chose to give you gifts...
However, the other couple is having a party, and it's etiquette to give them something - gift or money...now, if you choose not to go - then you are of coruse not obligated to give them anything, but you can't go to the EParty and NOT give something - it's just wrong.
Just put yourself in their shoes - if you threw a party, and a guest came and didn't give you anything - you'd be fuming...
The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding which I personally think is BS, and that's why I'm so against EParties (how many times do we really need to celebrate someone's path in life now????) I'd suck it up, give them something if YOU ARE going to the Party. If you're not - F.It...
I agree I personally could not go to a party without a gift. Even if I was told not to bring a gift, I would get a small token gift.
CalJoe0124
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If it was me I would be the bigger person and give a card or a small gift just to show them you are a nice person
sarahthegreat
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Posted by ChristineAE The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding
I completly disagree with this statement. we had an eparty so everyone could meet, not to raise money for the wedding. yes, we got gifts and they were appreciated, but to say we had it for the sole purpose of raising money is incredibly close minded. you are entiteld to your opinion, but when you make comments like this, you are offending people and its not necessary, jmo
dbleplay17
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I would give something small. Like a bridal book or a pretty fram or photoalbum Like 25 dollar range...Target has some good clearance stuff.
Like I said something small!
We didnt have an e party either but i f i was invited to one that is what i would do
Nadia
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Posted by ChristineAE
Michelle,
I'm going to cut the BS out for you....you chose not to have a party and people chose to give you gifts...
However, the other couple is having a party, and it's etiquette to give them something - gift or money...now, if you choose not to go - then you are of coruse not obligated to give them anything, but you can't go to the EParty and NOT give something - it's just wrong.
Just put yourself in their shoes - if you threw a party, and a guest came and didn't give you anything - you'd be fuming...
The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding which I personally think is BS, and that's why I'm so against EParties (how many times do we really need to celebrate someone's path in life now????) I'd suck it up, give them something if YOU ARE going to the Party. If you're not - F.It...
I am totally agree with you .
Shorty McBride
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Posted by smm2675
Posted by ChristineAE The whole purpose of an EParty is basically to 'raise' money for a wedding
I completly disagree with this statement. we had an eparty so everyone could meet, not to raise money for the wedding. yes, we got gifts and they were appreciated, but to say we had it for the sole purpose of raising money is incredibly close minded. you are entiteld to your opinion, but when you make comments like this, you are offending people and its not necessary, jmo
Thank you Sarah, I was thinking of a way to word that, but everytime I ran it through my head, it came out, 'Are you f*&(ing kidding me?'
