R U a no frills bride?

Original post by waterspout4

Sep 11, 2005 05:46 AM

I feel like I'm by myself when I think it's silly to spend money on unnecessary things. For instance.... why do I need to get a bathroom basket? A slipper basket?

My save-the-dates cost $3.81 for 150 guests. That's right, $3.81. We typed them on our computer and then went to Staples to print them on colored paper that matches our wedding colors. Other friends of ours have done fancy ones that had no info. All of our guests are from out-of-town and many have already booked their hotel rooms, because we included that on the STD.

My gown cost $80, brand new!! One girl told me she wouldn't pay less than $1000 for a gown. Why? It's the exact gown I was looking for. I just know how to shop. It's an $80 gown that originally retailed for $850.

Does anyone else feel like they don't need to spend enormous amounts of money to have a great wedding? (It also helps that we are paying for this wedding ourselves.) Don't get me wrong, I am very excited about the wedding!

I'm just wondering if I'm the only one that doesn't get all crazy over spending. Some experts have said that too many spend so much time and energy on the wedding that they forget about the marriage.

AlliNMatt06 Posted: Sep 11, 2005 02:02 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I am trying to save where I can, because I have to. Both of are parents are giving us a set amount, and the rest comes from us. So you can say I am on a budget.

If my parents said spent as much as you want, I would go crazy!!!!!!!!

On the other hand, if someone said you can't have a big wedding I really wouldn't care. I would fly to the Caribbean or Hawaii and have a small ceremony and dinner with close family and friends. My cousin did this, and it was beautiful!!!!!!!!

So I have no clue what kind of bride I am?

teany Posted: Sep 11, 2005 02:08 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I don't think people who are planning their wedding should worry so much about what they *should* do. I'm not talking about the traditional, ceremonial things, but the material. If you have a strict budget, and can find a way to do things inexpensively -- but in a way that YOU think is nice and that reflects you -- then do it. If you have the money and freedom to do whatever you want, you can express yourself that way. Just think of it as if you're just throwing a party and go from there. You don't HAVE to do what people have done at other parties. You see a dress you like, and can reasonably afford it, get it. You think the flowers at the corner deli are beautiful, use them. You think you don't need a slipper basket, then fine, don't have one. You don't NEED anything associated with weddings except you, your FH, family/friends and something to eat. The rest of it is all relative.

BKtoLI Posted: Sep 11, 2005 02:10 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I might be somewhere in between, but definitely more on the no frills side.

The dress I loved was $550, however because of my parents I now have a dress that is $1500. (My half is $700 which is still a lot less than other girls are paying!)

The invites were $250. It's a piece of paper that everyone but our parents will eventually throw away. My STDs were $2.50!!! (Free, only had to pay for shipping) My shoes were $15 on Ebay, instead of spending $60 in a bridal salon. The catering hall we negotiated down the cost by taking things off the menu.

My only splurge so far has been my tiara, and that's because now I found out I got ripped off. Had I shopped around, I would have found it for 50% less.

It's all about what's important to you. We spent the money where we think it was important, such as the hall and the photographer. Everything else is a toss up, so we looked for bargains, and so far we're doing well.

And hey if you have an $80 dress that looks like you spent $850, then great!! If you're happy, that's all that matters!!

lilpie19 Posted: Sep 11, 2005 02:17 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I am a little bit of both too. If I like it, I'll get it. But I do like to look at the cheaper versions first, because I would rather not spend the money when I can get a one for much cheaper. My wedding is in 2 years. I'm already thinking of making my invitations. I want to save as much money as I can, but still get nice things and If I spend a lot on one thing, I'll try to save money on another.

EmberLynn Posted: Sep 11, 2005 02:25 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

True story:

A girl I knew refused to go dress shopping with me at discount store. She said she didn't want a cheap dress. I looked around and saw some nice things but realised the whole thing wasn't me. But I remembered a few of the dress all very nice no more than $1000. Well this girl picked out her dress for $2500. She said she got it on sale and LOVED IT. She showed it to me and I told her I saw that same exact dress for $300 at the discount store! She refuses to believe me. That is where the crack about wedding dress came from. I'm not steping on anyones toes who spent more than $1000 for a dress, I'm only pointing out that you shouldn't refuse to check out a discount store dress because they are usually the same dresses. And I want to tell you something about the receptions. I've gone to receptions sites that charge you after the wedding for what used at the bar. And I have friend who works in a catering hall and she makes $7 an hour, so the waiters sure aren't getting the money. Sorry but you can't justfie $250 for a chicken dinner. Sorry girls, there is no way I'm buying that.

JBKempf Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:19 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I am a bargain shopper!!!! Great deals off of EBAY!

AmyMarie Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:21 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Posted by EmberLynn

Sorry but you can't justfie $250 for a chicken dinner. Sorry girls, there is no way I'm buying that.

I can understand wanting to save money, but telling people who are spending the money it is a waste is completely off the mark.

WE are having the wedding We WANT..whatever it costs. I can cut wherever my FI and I feel we don't need the expense. I do believe that you get what you pay for and I am willing to spend quite a bit of money to assure that the food at my wedding is great (good quality and well-prepared). I am not willing to spend $7000 on a band...I can easily have a dj for $1000 and be happy.
What you SPEND on your wedding is not a measure of the 'type' of person you are. Our wedding is not extravagant, but it is not inexpensive. I salute anyone who can and will have a small/big wedding on a small budget, but this is definiltey a case of 'Too each his Own'

October Bliss Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:21 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Posted by waterspout4

Does anyone else feel like they don't need to spend enormous amounts of money to have a great wedding? (It also helps that we are paying for this wedding ourselves.) Don't get me wrong, I am very excited about the wedding!

I'm just wondering if I'm the only one that doesn't get all crazy over spending. Some experts have said that too many spend so much time and energy on the wedding that they forget about the marriage.

I agree - you don't have to spend an enormous amount of money to have a great wedding. But like others, there are things that I want to have, so I am willing to spend the money.

The retail price on my dress was $900. I found it for $480. Is that a lot? Compared to a Vera Wang that starts at $3500 it is cheap. Compared to what you spent it is exhorbitant.
And that was the one thing my mother agreed to pay for that I could have gone to town with!

It is all a question of what you want, and then how savvy a shopper you are.

btrflygrl Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:27 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I am so with you....we had a budget and decided certain things were not necessary. WE did not do save the dates....save the dates are supposed to be for destination weddings, out of town guests only, or if you are having your wedding on a holiday weekend. We were none of those. Word of mouth worked fine!

No favors....I saw no reason to spend $$ on something people were either going to eat, put away in a drawer, or throw away and forget about.

Did not do picture TY either....when I ordered my invites we ordered Monogram Note Cards and used those as TY, and the left over ones we are continuing to use as thank yous for birthdays and holidays.

We used a regular florist, not a special wedding florist (I'm not sure how $$ it was because the IL paid for it).

It was hard enough planning a NY wedding on our budget and by no means, was it a cheap wedding, but it wasn't overly extravagant either. The important thing was that at the end of the day, we were husband and wife.

EmberLynn Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:32 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Posted by AmyMarie

Posted by EmberLynn

Sorry but you can't justfie $250 for a chicken dinner. Sorry girls, there is no way I'm buying that.

I can understand wanting to save money, but telling people who are spending the money it is a waste is completely off the mark.

WE are having the wedding We WANT..whatever it costs. I can cut wherever my FI and I feel we don't need the expense. I do believe that you get what you pay for and I am willing to spend quite a bit of money to assure that the food at my wedding is great (good quality and well-prepared). I am not willing to spend $7000 on a band...I can easily have a dj for $1000 and be happy.
What you SPEND on your wedding is not a measure of the 'type' of person you are. Our wedding is not extravagant, but it is not inexpensive. I salute anyone who can and will have a small/big wedding on a small budget, but this is definiltey a case of 'Too each his Own'

I'm not saying you shouldn't have it, I'm saying I don't agree with it for me. For MY WEDDING I refuse to pay that kind of money. i've been offered $10,000 by my father to pay for the reception. I refused it. Because I personally for ME don't believe that much money can't be justfied TO ME!!!!! FOR MY WEDDING. Do what you want for your wedding, I'm merely pointing out I WANT IT FOR MY WEDDING.

littlebookworm4 Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:34 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Posted by jimmysgrl

I'm a little bit of both. I look to everything as 'Do I really need this?' and the extra frills I let slide. But the way I see it is my reception hall and dress are pretty frilly so I try to balance it out. But yes, invites, STD's, programs, menus, all the cheapest I could find or DIY.

Same here.

12-3Princess Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:35 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Posted by Mrs.Ztobe

Posted by prncssrachel

Posted by waterspout4

I'm just wondering if I'm the only one that doesn't get all crazy over spending. Some experts have said that too many spend so much time and energy on the wedding that they forget about the marriage.

Just because you spend a lot of money and energy on your wedding does not mean you have forgotten about the marriage. We spent a ton of money on our wedding and never once did I forget about my marriage. People do what's best for them. If that means spending 50, 60, 100 thousand dollars on a wedding or 5 or 10 thousand on a wedding, it's all fine. Weddings reflect the people who throw them, and everyone is different. I think it is wonderful that you know what you want and can find it for a great price, but others do not need to or want to do this, and that's fine, too. JMHO.

I agree

Thank you. Very well said.

ML110 Posted: Sep 11, 2005 03:52 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

i was definitely a no frills bride. i got my shoes at famous footwear for like $20- nobody sees you shoes under all that dress anyway. my mom made my dress, and the girls dresses.... my dress cost about $500, the girls dresses total cost about $100. we didn't do save the dates- word of mouth worked fine for us. i shopped and shopped for a caterer that included hor dourves, a buffet with 3 entrees, DJ, cake, centerpeices, and other decorations for $65 per person- it was beautiful, and almost 3 months later, people still tell us how good the food was. i also didn't go nuts with favors- paid $1 per guest to the lance armstrong fund and everyone got a livestrong bracelet and a tin of mints. we bought our own alcohol for the reception and the liquor store bought back any unopened bottels after the wedding- we were able to get almost $200 back that way.
and it was a great day, total cost about $17,000- and i feel like we have just as good memories as we would have if we had spent twice as much. not knocking people who do- an expensive wedding just wasn't for us, i refused to spend the downpayment on a house for a one day party.

ShortBride Posted: Sep 11, 2005 05:57 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I am definately a 'no frills' bride - our 'save the date' was an e-mail, and our invitations we printed outselves on cards from office max! My dress was around $550... we are definatly very budget conscious.

However, I have had friends who spend tons of money on weddings, and said it was worth every penny. I think it just depends on what you want. For example, I never dreamed of being a princess bride, but other women have, so if they have the means, this is the day to do it!

MrsP2Be Posted: Sep 11, 2005 06:04 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

I think I'm a little of both. I'll spend on things that I find important but I'll budget here and there. When all is said & done it will probably be the cost of an average wedding.

Jackie&Justin Posted: Sep 11, 2005 06:07 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Posted by edsprincess

I guess I'm a no frills bride. I don't see paying so much for things. For example, my shoes I bought at payless $20 bucks!!!! For me to wear them for 1 hr or so. I have co-workers that say they spend 60-over 100 for damn shoes.

I agree, I think I got my shoes for 25 bucks. I buy A LOT of stuff online, including my dress, save the dates, ect. I think for our wedding will cost around $12,000 total. However, my parents are paying for half of that. Personally, I would rather have money for a house that lasts a lifetime than on one day.

waterspout4 Posted: Sep 11, 2005 08:52 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Wow. I'm so glad to hear that there are other brides that got their shoes at Payless. I hope I didn't offend anyone that wants to pay more and get the frills. I was just beginning to think I was the only one that wasn't concerned about designer prices.

Good luck with all your weddings and thanks for letting me know I'm not the only one!

Goldi1021 Posted: Sep 11, 2005 08:55 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with getting bridal shoes at Payless. I went to every shoe store on G-d's green earth to find shoes that would suit me and my need for comfort. If I could have found them at Payless, I would have bought them there. Unfortunately I have podiatric issues. I wear orthodics and have major hammertoes despite my surgeries. It was worth it for me to spend what I did on my shoes so I can enjoy my day pain free. Much to my dismay, the price tag was painful! I didnt want to pay more. I HAD to pay more!

EvenEdan Posted: Sep 11, 2005 08:57 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

Nope, I definitely enjoy the frills!

mariela2006 Posted: Sep 11, 2005 09:03 PM

Re: R U a no frills bride?

me too i am a no frills bride that is why i havent committed yet to a hall and vendors i am trying to find the best deals. where are these discount wedding dress stores you guys talk about it i still have to find my dress? under $100 wow!