Rebound relationships- can they work?

Rebound relationships- can they work?

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

ME!!! I usually don't think they are the right thing to do either but somehow it worked for me. I was in a relationship (for about a year) that wasn't right for me and went right into one with someone else (my current DH). I never did that before. Anytime before when I broke up with someone I always took the time for myself - usually about a year at least. I did take it slow and actually figured it was just a summer fling (for both of us - we started dating down NJ shore) and now 7 years later - we are still together and happily married!

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

YEP!!! My DH was engaged before we met. They broke up MAYBE 3 months before we started dating. The thing is he told me it was almost 5 months which I still was skeptical about. I didn't want to be the rebound relationship so I was unsure if I should keep seeing him (if I KNEW it was 3 months -or less- I never would have) We just had such a great time together it was hard to stop. When he got engaged the first time he was young and wasn't ready but she pushed and he gave in. When they broke up and we started dating he began to see what a relationship should have been about and that made him appreciate what we had.

The thing is..we did break up after 1 1/2 (he broke my heart
) His dad passed away (2 months after they found out he had cancer) and he really freaked out in a way. We broke up for 5 months (I had thought it was for good) He says after a short time he began to realize he made a mistake but was unsure how I felt. He FINALLY called me and we got back together stronger than ever, realizing this was IT!!!

It is a scary thing but if it works out, it makes it all worth it...Now we are happily married

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I met my husband approx. 4 months after breaking up with my ex and he just broke up with his ex girlfriend about 1 month before...so I guess sometimes it might work.

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I broke up with Matt in Jan00...

LAst week in Feb I met Ronnie and Started dating the first week in March.
Moved in together 6mts later..

Best decision of my life so far!

I was out of love for a long time with the EX so the breakup wasn't hard at all!

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

Yes it can work. I broke up with a boyfriend not too long before I started dating DH.....like Theresa said, you can be out of love with someone for a long time before you actually break up. Makes the picture much clearer...

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I started dating FH 2 months after I broke up with my ex. In the middle 2 months I was casually dating several guys which I considered my rebound period!!!

But what Theresa said about being out of love with the ex for a while has a lot to do with it for me too. I was totally not into my relationship, it just took a few months to get myself out of it.
I think the rebounds where you were heartbroken and looking for a replacement are the ones you have to be careful with.

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I met my DH 3 weeks after I broke up with me eX. I went to a concert (prodded to go by my friends), lost my friends and met him. I don't see anything wrong with it b/c I wasn't in love with my EX, and our relationship wasn't all that serious (We were young, I was his first GF).

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

It definitely can work. I too, started dating my FH only a couple of weeks after breaking up with my ex-boyfriend. Like CatchI22, I wasn't in love with my ex and we weren't all that serious either. We were together 3 months if that.

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I was in a 3 year relationship with a guy, we broke up and less then 2 weeks later I was with another guy. That was a huge mistake. My friends warned me about this guy. I thought they were nuts. Turned out they were right, he was a jerk. So I then took some time for myself and did things for me. Then I started dating my best friends cousin. We were together 3 months and he breaks up with me on my birthday on my answering machine. Yea talk about low. I was so hurt. I then took the time to go out with my friends and concentrate on other things. It took me a while to really be comfortable to date again. I built up a wall around my heart and wouldnt allow anyone in. I then met FI in Jan 1999 and thought oh he's just another guy it will last 3 months and be over. I was very wrong. I am so in love with him and I have never been happier.

So sometimes it takes a few wrongs to make things right. I learned from my past and its made me a stronger person.

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

Yeah, I think it works. I was in a 4+ year relationship...that lasted 3 1/2+ years too long. Broke up with him...not even a month later, I went on my first date with Chris and 6 1/2 years later, we're (still) together & getting married.

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I think it can definitely work! Do you know how many people I have met who were on the rebound and then found the real love of their life!!! I think it is so interesting, cause you never know where life is going to take you!

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I was dating someone for a month before I met DH...the night after the break up I met DH...but the previous relationship didn't get to a serious level at all...so not sure this counts...

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I was never one to bounce from one relationship to the next. I spent over a year by myself between breaking off a relationship w/my ex and meeting my wonderful DH. But, something that I have learned through watching my friends....a 'rebound' relationship is not necessarily a bad thing. It really depends on the circumstances of the old relationship and the reasons for the new one.

The bottom line - if the timing is right, and the people having genuine feelings in their hearts, ANYTHING is possible!

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

We are! DH started dating me weeks after my boyfriend of 1 1/2 years broke up with me. It was college, and I just figured we'd casually date. I wasn't looking for anything serious and told him so, just someone to go out with and hang out with. He even stood by me as my 'friend' for months when I stopped dating him while I figured out what to do when my ex came back to me and wanted to marry me. I decided my ex wasn't right for me, not because of DH but for other reasons, and DH convinced me to date him again. Now, five years later and happily married, here we are.

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

we are too!!! (funny how many there are here)
I met FH 2 or 3 months after i broke up with ex fiance (who i always knew was never right for me). I didn't tell him at first about the ex because i didn't want him to think it was a rebound. It really wasn't though because i didn't have any expectations, we took it slow... and i was over ex before we offically broke up anyway.

and here we are!

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

I'm marrying mine. I was with someone for 4 years b4 my FH and kinda was just stuck then I met him and the rest is history. Depends on the situation.

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

They can definately work! My FH is actually a rebound relationship....I was dating someone else when I met him, and when the relationship ended, I started dating FH almost immediately. It's been over 2 years since we have been together, so I can say yes, they can definately work....

Re: Rebound relationships- can they work?

My FSIL was with her ex for almost 5 years and she broke up with him (he was 'the love of her life') and she immediately started dating her bf now. They have been together for 8 years. A rebound that lasted forever.