Rehearsal Dinner stress

halfpintny Posted: May 31, 2005 12:35 AM

Rehearsal Dinner stress

Ok girls with 2 1/2 months left to the wedding....I need to take the bull by the horns and figure out what I'm doing about the rehearsal dinner which FH insists his father is paying for but to which FFIL has not said one word to me about. Soooo....am I responsible for planning the RD and then asking my FFIL for the money? Am I supposed to ask him how much he has allotted and try to work from there? Did you all plan your own RDs or was the one who hosted it the planner? I'm treading on thin ice with my ILs already with their 'frugal' (i'm being nice here) ways so I'm trying to find a diplomatic way of doing this. TIA

Backinneyork Posted: May 31, 2005 10:18 AM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

Definitely find out who's paying before you plan it. My FFIL is paying for it. We got a budget from him and then took it from there.

halfpintny Posted: May 31, 2005 11:28 AM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

anyone else?

Stacey04 Posted: May 31, 2005 11:33 AM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

If your FH is the one that told you his father is paying for it, then tell him to ask his dad how much he is willing to spend b/c it needs to be planned.

LFitzy79 Posted: May 31, 2005 11:36 AM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

Posted by Stacey04

If your FH is the one that told you his father is paying for it, then tell him to ask his dad how much he is willing to spend b/c it needs to be planned.

I agree. Make you FH be the buffer.

halfpintny Posted: May 31, 2005 01:08 PM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

So it's me that plans the RD not FFIL? My concern is that he's going to say here's $200 throw the RD

dpli Posted: May 31, 2005 01:50 PM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

I would try to get an idea of what they want to spend, or get a few options and present them to them and see what they say. For example, maybe get a few restaurant quotes and also what it would cost to cater it if you had it at someone's house and see what the reaction is. If they aren't willing to pay much, at least you know that and can start planning accordingly.

FYI- the rehearsal dinner is not mandatory

Bunnymonkey Posted: May 31, 2005 02:02 PM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

our in laws told us how much they were looking to spend and then turned the planning over to us - we worked within the budget. I definitly think it is your FH's job to talk to them about $$ for this.

Perhaps you can get an idea of what a frugal RD WOULD cost, and then propose that amount, based on your research.

LFitzy79 Posted: May 31, 2005 02:08 PM

Re: Rehearsal Dinner stress

The RD is there affair to plan, traditionally, but a lot of people plan in conjunction with the bride and groom, or they turn it over to them to plan, and they pick up the tab. There's nothing wrong with asking, and figuring out a budget up front.