Rehearsal dinners...need advice

I need some serious opinions..we are paying for our wedding ourselves..we arent having a rehearsal until the day of the wedding because its in a small chapel right next to our reception place..so teh groom goes in for a few minutes they tell him what to do and I go in for a few minutes ..thats it. We will be decorating the chapel the night before as well. So I know people have the dinner the night before to thank guests for coming in from out of town and to thank the bridal party..here is my dillemma..we are stressed about money..I know traditionally the grooms family pays for it..but i dont think it will happen in our situation, my parenst arent paying for the wedding, they are helping out a bit as much as they can..but neverthe less, we are strssed. We werent even going to have a dinner the night before..but now am thinking about it..its just that the majority of our guests are coming from out of town..neither us are from teh east coast..so most of our family and friends will be flying to come to our wedding..so do we invite EVERYONE..it would be around 50- 60 people..so if we should do it, does anyone know of any good but resonable prices near Roslyn? Or does anyone have any ideas of how we can do this? Im stressed!