Ever since my FH and I started to plan our wedding we have been arguing often. Mostly about wedding decisions, but some other stuff too. And I'll admit that we used to fight A LOT a few years ago, but our relationship as steadly gotten better since then. And now things are mostly great, it's just that at least three days a week things are so tense in this house that any little comment will set one of us off.
I know on my half, my mood swings are mostly stress related and I'm really trying to be nicer. But everytime I ask my FH why he's being mean or snapping at me, he just says he had a bad day and goes to hide in the bedroom 'cause he doesn't want the kids to see us fighting. Most of the time if I leave him alone for a few hours, he calms down and everything is fine.
I'm the kind of person who would much rather forgive and forget than hold on to things, but I had to ask him today if he had a problem with me or if anything was wrong? He assured me everything was fine and even apolized for being so grumpy lately. I'm 99% sure our bad moods lately are stressed related due to the wedding, but there's that other 1%...I don't know, maybe I'm making too much out of this. My family thinks everything will be fine once the wedding is over with and we are settled back into our old routine.
What do you think? Should I worry?
LaurenluvsTJ
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
We have been fighting a lot lately too, but but we know its due to stress. We know we still are madly in love with each other and that we want to get married. I wouldn't worry too much. Talk to him about it. We did this yesterday and it was really nice.
stephanielyse
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Melissa&Steve
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
we were bickering a lot too...I am sure it is wedding related...we are planning our wedding in 6 months so there is just sioo much to do and so many decisions to make it is overwhelming!!
We made a promise to have 'wedding free' time when we do not talk about anyhting to do with the wedding and it worked amazingly!!
JanuaryBride06
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
We had a rough couple of months during our engagement - when I realized how much it was affecting our relationship, we designated certain nights for wedding talk so that it wasn't a constant topic of converstation. We still bicker occassionally, but ever since the wedding, we've been virtually fight/issue free.
SweetCin704
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
We have been arguing a lot lately as well....just both being high strung & letting the little things get to us & I'm very moody & he tends to snap (especially b/c he stopped smoking 8 weeks ago)....we started having a date night where its just us & we get back to us & have quality time & its been doing wonders.
His mom just said to us this week things will calm down after the wedding....its coming soon & there are so many things going on & budget concerns & much more, but remember what its all about and why you are together.
leese
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
someone told me when i first got engaged that if i could make it through the engagement....we'd be fine....
you only have a few months left. it's natural to fight....we do all the time!
BJandDan
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
It's stress. We have all been there! You are not abnormal, nor is he!!!!!! You know already but, We're hear if you need to vent or have any questions!
AprilBride2006
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
Thanks. I feel better knowing we're not the only couple going through this. Taking a time out is a good suggestion, we might have to try that.
beautyq115
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
I think its naturally a very stressful time
hmpena
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
Being engaged can really take its toll on a couple. Make sure you and your FH have time for just the 2 of you to enjoy each other.
Sunrise813
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
I bet if we did a poll on who is arguing more durigng the engagement you would see that a majority are.
I think its normal to argue more during the engagement because its a streddful situation. FH & I have been getting on each other's nerves, but I know that its the planning, and the fact tha we don't see each other becasue its tax season for both of us, so it means alot of late nights at work. Only you can answer that question for yourself, you know your FH & your relationship.
mable
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
I think it happens.. My husband and I fought all the time.. There is so much stress from planning the wedidng to people nagging you to any little thing making you flip out.. just make sure you do not go to bed or leave in the morning mad.. life is too short... Now w/ the baby on the way my husband and I argue a bit but again its nerves and i am sure the little fights will pass sooner or later or make us stonger..
conigs25
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
Us too. Sometimes i hate matt Seriously, i think its all normal stuff
Katie&Chris2006
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
I posted about the same thing a couple of weeks ago since I was worried it was just me. All these girls made me feel a lot better and helped me realize that this is a stressful time and that's why it is happening.
We are here for you!
AprilBride2006
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
Posted by Katie&Chris2006
I posted about the same thing a couple of weeks ago since I was worried it was just me. All these girls made me feel a lot better and helped me realize that this is a stressful time and that's why it is happening.
We are here for you!
Thank you so much.
Preshy7
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
we fight alot lately- but mostly about wedding sh!t.. it suckks...my coworker told me that after being married 20 years with kids etc, his biggest fights ever were about the wedding...
i think that once you are married- all the planning stuff and the stress kind of goes away and its back to the way you felt when you were dating... which to me, was alot less stressful
shellnroc
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
I definitely think it's due to stress. FH and I bicker over alot of things which the majority of the time has to do with the wedding. Planning a wedding is very stressful. I never thought it would be so stressful, but it really is and sometimes I feel people really do not understand that.
I know its easier said than done, but try to relax. I think you are both very stressed!!!
franksgirl323
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Re: Relationship during engagment?
the first 6 months of our engagement was like that....arguing all the time. Now that most of the planning is done...and we are just saving to pay for it all....everything has calmed down. We haven't had an argument in quite some time. I'm sure its all directly related to the stress.
