Relieved!! (long - sorry)
ok so i just had soooo much tension / stress released from my shoulders. i have been in a bad situation regarding my wedding for a while now.
i have a group of friends. there are 7 of us. 4 of which are already married. i am the 5th to get married. everyone's bridal party has looked the same becasue we are all close. however....
within the group, i was closer with 2 guys then the others. Brian and Mookie. Mookie i lived with for 4 years when i was 19-23 years old. we were very close back then. after we moved out, i started dating a certain girl, and he and i grew apart tremendously. so much so, that when he got married, i wasnt even in his weddign party. he is the type of person to 'punish' people when they do something he doesnt like. aparently, he didnt like the girl i was with, she changed me (he was right about that, i did change). so he didnt have me in the party. fine. no big deal. i moved past it, even though it was very painful to go to this wedding and watch everyone be a part of this day, and i was only one that wasnt. it took a while, but i got over it.
now it's my wedding. Mookie has already been asked to be in my wedding party. i would never NOT have him be a part of my wedding. Brian (some of you know him), is my best friend. i have known him for 15 years and we have been through A LOT!!! it is understood that Brian is my best man... no issues what so ever.
i have another friend named Mike who is not part of the circle of 7 guys. i have known him for just as long as Brian. of all my friends... he's the only person who has NEVER done me wrong in any shape or form. i very badly want Mike to be my second best man.
one sunday months ago, while at the bar, i had mentioned to a couple people (including Mookie) that i was considering asking Mike to be a best man. Mookie then turned and openly said that he would be very upset if i asked mike over him because we lived together for 4 years, and we are so much closer the me and mike.
the thing i dont get is... if we were 'as close as he claims', then why was i not even asked to be in his wedding party? and now he's gonna be upset that i dont ask him to be my best man???? is that weird? granted, we have worked out our issues, and since i have been with Jackie, i see him a lot more, and our friendship has basically gone back to the way it used to be... but still. through the time i was with my ex (i call that the black hole of my life)... i still stayed in constant contact with mike. our friendship never waivered. and i was in his wedding party as well.
so coming full circle to today... i was having a conversation with a friend of mine today about the situation, and a few valid points were raised... and i made the decision to ask mike to be my best man. he gladly accepted, and i couldnt be happier. since the day Jackie and I got engaged, i have been wrestling back and forth with this decision. i didnt know what to do. Jackie was getting upset because she knew that i wanted mike there... she knew it was bothering me. this is not saying that i dont love mookie... but i needed mike at my side when i got married. mike and i have had a differnt kind of bond, and for an occasion like this... he's the one that i need up there. now i have to figure out how to tell mookie this.
in conclussion... i feel so much better now having my bridal party in order. a ton of bricks have just been released from my shoulders. i just had to share.
thank you for listening... sorry it was long.
i have a group of friends. there are 7 of us. 4 of which are already married. i am the 5th to get married. everyone's bridal party has looked the same becasue we are all close. however....
within the group, i was closer with 2 guys then the others. Brian and Mookie. Mookie i lived with for 4 years when i was 19-23 years old. we were very close back then. after we moved out, i started dating a certain girl, and he and i grew apart tremendously. so much so, that when he got married, i wasnt even in his weddign party. he is the type of person to 'punish' people when they do something he doesnt like. aparently, he didnt like the girl i was with, she changed me (he was right about that, i did change). so he didnt have me in the party. fine. no big deal. i moved past it, even though it was very painful to go to this wedding and watch everyone be a part of this day, and i was only one that wasnt. it took a while, but i got over it.
now it's my wedding. Mookie has already been asked to be in my wedding party. i would never NOT have him be a part of my wedding. Brian (some of you know him), is my best friend. i have known him for 15 years and we have been through A LOT!!! it is understood that Brian is my best man... no issues what so ever.
i have another friend named Mike who is not part of the circle of 7 guys. i have known him for just as long as Brian. of all my friends... he's the only person who has NEVER done me wrong in any shape or form. i very badly want Mike to be my second best man.
one sunday months ago, while at the bar, i had mentioned to a couple people (including Mookie) that i was considering asking Mike to be a best man. Mookie then turned and openly said that he would be very upset if i asked mike over him because we lived together for 4 years, and we are so much closer the me and mike.
the thing i dont get is... if we were 'as close as he claims', then why was i not even asked to be in his wedding party? and now he's gonna be upset that i dont ask him to be my best man???? is that weird? granted, we have worked out our issues, and since i have been with Jackie, i see him a lot more, and our friendship has basically gone back to the way it used to be... but still. through the time i was with my ex (i call that the black hole of my life)... i still stayed in constant contact with mike. our friendship never waivered. and i was in his wedding party as well.
so coming full circle to today... i was having a conversation with a friend of mine today about the situation, and a few valid points were raised... and i made the decision to ask mike to be my best man. he gladly accepted, and i couldnt be happier. since the day Jackie and I got engaged, i have been wrestling back and forth with this decision. i didnt know what to do. Jackie was getting upset because she knew that i wanted mike there... she knew it was bothering me. this is not saying that i dont love mookie... but i needed mike at my side when i got married. mike and i have had a differnt kind of bond, and for an occasion like this... he's the one that i need up there. now i have to figure out how to tell mookie this.
in conclussion... i feel so much better now having my bridal party in order. a ton of bricks have just been released from my shoulders. i just had to share.
thank you for listening... sorry it was long.
