repost: Weddings and the economy

Thank you for posting!

FH keeps telling me we won't have anyone at our wedding because it's right after X-mas and because of the economy. Guess i should show him the article.

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Posted by cherish83

My dad heard on the radio the other day that the n no percentage is now up to 30-40% because people can't afford to go to weddings. Made me feel a little better since we were getting so many No's

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I can see that happening. DH and I are going to a destination wedding the weekend before Christmas and on flights and hotel alone we are paying close to 2K. If it was not someone that we were close to we would not be able to go.

I think also people feel bad to go to a wedding without a gift and that's why with the economy the way it is people are saying no more often.

You know, the last quote in the article really is strange and kinda pissses me off:

'Maybe some people are concerned about their jobs and giving gifts,' Cocchi said, 'but I think most people, when it comes to a wedding, realize that the importance of the date has to supersede something as superficial as money.'

Um, hello, money isn't superficial. You either have it or you don't. I know we are all hoping that the economy doesn't change the $$ we get in gifts, but it may for some of us, and if a friend of mine is having a hard time, I really hope she doesn't give me more than she can afford. The quote seems to say, hey, give anyway, it's a wedding for pete's sake! Well, I just don't feel that way. In the weddings I am going to next year, I'll give what I can reasonably - but if I don't have enough for what is considered a nice gift, I'm not going to go into debt for it - I'll give what I can. Yes, the event is very important, but I'm not gonna get a cash advance on my cc to give a gift..... just my two cents ....

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

You know, the last quote in the article really is strange and kinda pissses me off:

'Maybe some people are concerned about their jobs and giving gifts,' Cocchi said, 'but I think most people, when it comes to a wedding, realize that the importance of the date has to supersede something as superficial as money.'

Um, hello, money isn't superficial. You either have it or you don't. I know we are all hoping that the economy doesn't change the $$ we get in gifts, but it may for some of us, and if a friend of mine is having a hard time, I really hope she doesn't give me more than she can afford. The quote seems to say, hey, give anyway, it's a wedding for pete's sake! Well, I just don't feel that way. In the weddings I am going to next year, I'll give what I can reasonably - but if I don't have enough for what is considered a nice gift, I'm not going to go into debt for it - I'll give what I can. Yes, the event is very important, but I'm not gonna get a cash advance on my cc to give a gift..... just my two cents ....

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Hummm I can see what you are saying but I guess I am the opposite. I feel like after I know how much I spent on a wedding if I can't afford to at least 'cover my plate' or give a gift that I feel comfortable with I wouldnt go. You are so right in the fact that people should not go into debt for a gift but to me I just wouldnt want the couple to spend so much money on me when they might be struggling themselves. Of course there were people that went to my wedding with no gifts and I had no problem with that. What was important to me is that they were there with me but I just cant do that- maybe its a personal thing.

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

You know, the last quote in the article really is strange and kinda pissses me off:

'Maybe some people are concerned about their jobs and giving gifts,' Cocchi said, 'but I think most people, when it comes to a wedding, realize that the importance of the date has to supersede something as superficial as money.'

Um, hello, money isn't superficial. You either have it or you don't. I know we are all hoping that the economy doesn't change the $$ we get in gifts, but it may for some of us, and if a friend of mine is having a hard time, I really hope she doesn't give me more than she can afford. The quote seems to say, hey, give anyway, it's a wedding for pete's sake! Well, I just don't feel that way. In the weddings I am going to next year, I'll give what I can reasonably - but if I don't have enough for what is considered a nice gift, I'm not going to go into debt for it - I'll give what I can. Yes, the event is very important, but I'm not gonna get a cash advance on my cc to give a gift..... just my two cents ....

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hmmm interesting take on it. I actually thought the opposite when I read it. I saw it as even if you dont have alot to give just go and give what you can. Dont miss out on the most important day in somebodies life just bc you dont have as much as you would like to give. That money shouldn't stop you from missing out on an event. Not that you should give more than you want to. And that your presence is more important to the couple than the amount you give them.

I have no idea what the author of the article meant but thats what I thought when I read it and thought 'what a great last quote' hahaha

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

You know, the last quote in the article really is strange and kinda pissses me off:

'Maybe some people are concerned about their jobs and giving gifts,' Cocchi said, 'but I think most people, when it comes to a wedding, realize that the importance of the date has to supersede something as superficial as money.'

Um, hello, money isn't superficial. You either have it or you don't. I know we are all hoping that the economy doesn't change the $$ we get in gifts, but it may for some of us, and if a friend of mine is having a hard time, I really hope she doesn't give me more than she can afford. The quote seems to say, hey, give anyway, it's a wedding for pete's sake! Well, I just don't feel that way. In the weddings I am going to next year, I'll give what I can reasonably - but if I don't have enough for what is considered a nice gift, I'm not going to go into debt for it - I'll give what I can. Yes, the event is very important, but I'm not gonna get a cash advance on my cc to give a gift..... just my two cents ....

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hmmm interesting take on it. I actually thought the opposite when I read it. I saw it as even if you dont have alot to give just go and give what you can. Dont miss out on the most important day in somebodies life just bc you dont have as much as you would like to give. That money shouldn't stop you from missing out on an event. Not that you should give more than you want to. And that your presence is more important to the couple than the amount you give them.

I have no idea what the author of the article meant but thats what I thought when I read it and thought 'what a great last quote' hahaha

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i give what i can also but you know some guests are worried that they are giving too little and the bride and groom will judge them (we've seen so many of that on here). im not saying they shouldnt go for that reason but they do have that fear.

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Posted by jennandrolo

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

You know, the last quote in the article really is strange and kinda pissses me off:

'Maybe some people are concerned about their jobs and giving gifts,' Cocchi said, 'but I think most people, when it comes to a wedding, realize that the importance of the date has to supersede something as superficial as money.'

Um, hello, money isn't superficial. You either have it or you don't. I know we are all hoping that the economy doesn't change the $$ we get in gifts, but it may for some of us, and if a friend of mine is having a hard time, I really hope she doesn't give me more than she can afford. The quote seems to say, hey, give anyway, it's a wedding for pete's sake! Well, I just don't feel that way. In the weddings I am going to next year, I'll give what I can reasonably - but if I don't have enough for what is considered a nice gift, I'm not going to go into debt for it - I'll give what I can. Yes, the event is very important, but I'm not gonna get a cash advance on my cc to give a gift..... just my two cents ....

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hmmm interesting take on it. I actually thought the opposite when I read it. I saw it as even if you dont have alot to give just go and give what you can. Dont miss out on the most important day in somebodies life just bc you dont have as much as you would like to give. That money shouldn't stop you from missing out on an event. Not that you should give more than you want to. And that your presence is more important to the couple than the amount you give them.

I have no idea what the author of the article meant but thats what I thought when I read it and thought 'what a great last quote' hahaha

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i give what i can also but you know some guests are worried that they are giving too little and the bride and groom will judge them (we've seen so many of that on here). im not saying they shouldnt go for that reason but they do have that fear.

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oh i agree and can see why guests are afraid of this. I just said what i thought the author was saying. DH and I also like to give a certain amount and if we can't then yeah i would feel the same way.

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Posted by nifheim

what kinda gets me is when you read the comments on teh story on newsday.com - kinda scary IoI

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i didnt even read those before but WOW what miserable people, its kinda funny and ridiculous. Why even comment on weddings if you dont care for them

Wow those comments on the article are nuts!

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Posted by nifheim

that is it - if you don't care for them why comment? I mean I agree you can have a nice small wedding and do a potluck (my friends aer doing this in a barn upstate) and honestly its really freaking sweet but some people like to have a LI/NY wedding and I don't think there is anything wrong with it. It is their monday - so why comment on saying 'good - your spoiled'.

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Because those commenters have nothing else better to do than rail against something that they don't understand in a state they don't even live in....

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Posted by EsquireBride

Wow those comments on the article are nuts!

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people get a bit nasty...

i do hope people realize they should spend what they can afford and dont go into debt for their wedding (as the host or the guest). cuz its not about how much $ u are spending...its the celebration of your union

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Posted by EsquireBride

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Posted by nifheim

that is it - if you don't care for them why comment? I mean I agree you can have a nice small wedding and do a potluck (my friends aer doing this in a barn upstate) and honestly its really freaking sweet but some people like to have a LI/NY wedding and I don't think there is anything wrong with it. It is their monday - so why comment on saying 'good - your spoiled'.

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Because those commenters have nothing else better to do than rail against something that they don't understand in a state they don't even live in....

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they are just ignorant. How are they even comparing prices of weddings in other states compared to NY. Even if we did the EXACT same thing as somebody in another state, we would still pay more for it bc its NY. Just shows how stupid they are. Same way you can buy a huge home with 4-5 bedrooms big yard for $300k but you can barely get an apt for that in NY. I guess they didnt think of any of these things