My mom and I just had an argument about this subject. I have a few same sex couples invited to my wedding. My mom says they should each have their own invite because its 'not proper' to put them on the same invite.
I think that if theyre a couple then they share an invitation, for ex. Mr. John Smith & Mr. Jack Brown, since this is what is done with married couples.
Mom thinks that having both names on one invite is 'outting' them (to whom? i dunno the f..ing mailman? they live together jeez)
I think it's insulting them by stating that their love or 'coupleness' is less than it is.
ANY THOUGHTS ON THIS???
UPDATE: Mom called me and told me that she spoke with one of her friends that this post pertains to and he said exactly what we were all saying. So believe it or not ...mom apologized and said she was 100% wrong!!
SoontobeMrsO
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
I would address them together.
Mr. John Smith Mr. Jack Brown 123 Main Street Any Where, State Zip
whoever i know personally went first. (my cousin and her girlfriend).
MrsB2BE
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Posted by SoontobeMrsO
I would address them together.
Mr. John Smith Mr. Jack Brown 123 Main Street Any Where, State Zip
I agree!!
brittny817
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
We also have several same sex couples that are invited. If they live together we addressed them like any other couple that lives together: Mr. John Smith & Mr. John Doe (none of our gay guests have had a comittment ceremony so we did not address it as if they are married)
If they don't live together and we only know one of the people it was sent to: Mr. John Smith & Guest
If we knew both guests they were given seperate invitations.
HTH
Ericab1980
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
This is how I addressed my cousin and his partner
Mr. Sam Doe and Mr. Alan Smith 1313 Mockingbird Lane Boondocks, NJ 07666
If they live together they'd share an invite, just like you would do an unmarried couple living together..
diva7531
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Defintley Mr jack brown and Mr John Smith. Tell your mom it would be an insult otherwise if they are living together.
magbride
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
I posted on BHB board, but meant to add that I was slightly insulted when a good friend's invite was addressed to me and guest. FH and I live together and she definitely knows his name, so I can definitely see how separate invites might insult your friends.
sugarkube4
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
I addressed my 2 Uncles as
Mr. Joseph L and Mr. Victor R address address
They have been together since wayyyyyy before I was born.. one is related, the other is my godfather.. they are my uncles!!!
GabrielleandJohn
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Here are the rules as I see it. We invited all couples that are living together as follows regardless of orientation:
Mr. Bob Hope Ms. Vana White 123 caddyshack lane New York, NY 10207
If the couple did not live together and we are only friends with one party then it was to the person we know and guest because well, I am not inviting there other to my wedding. The rule is to put the name of the person you want to invite on the envelope and plus guest so they know they can bring a date.
Mr. Marky Mark and Guest 123 For the Money lane Hudson, NY 16790
If they are married or had a commitment ceremony the invite was as follows:
Mrs. and Mrs. Anne and Ellen Degenerous 123 love lane rye, ny 17890
We have alot of same sex couples, singles and committment couples and the rules are the same for same sex as for oppostie sex.
MJDoc12
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
address them together!!!!!
forget what your mom says...if they are a couple and especially if they live together, i would be offended if i was them and received separate invites. go with your gut!
btw--sounds like your mom probably just doesn't like the idea of having gay couples at the wedding....and wants to downplay it was much as possible...cause i'm sure she will also go crazy over place cards and having a gay couple on a placecard together!
chatxleau24
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Here's the problem the couples in question are her friends!!! She thinks that they would be embarrased - I dont understand why. Maybe she's just old fashioned and she thinks everyone else is too?
MJDoc12
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Posted by chatxleau24
Here's the problem the couples in question are her friends!!! She thinks that they would be embarrased - I dont understand why. Maybe she's just old fashioned and she thinks everyone else is too?
! yeah i think she's just being old fashioned. honeslty, they probably would appreciate it. i remember reading on here a girl had addressed the invite to her FH's uncle or something as a couple...and they actually called and thanked them for it, cause it meant so much to them.
GabrielleandJohn
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Posted by MJDoc12 btw--sounds like your mom probably just doesn't like the idea of having gay couples at the wedding....and wants to downplay it was much as possible...cause i'm sure she will also go crazy over place cards and having a gay couple on a placecard together!
I do not think this is a fair statement. I would assume that her mother is from a different generation and is conserned with proper etiquet. I may be overstepping BUT assuming that someones parent has 'issues' with homosexuality is a huge leap not to mention potentially insulting.
dianadrw
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Posted by Ericab1980
This is how I addressed my cousin and his partner
Mr. Sam Doe and Mr. Alan Smith 1313 Mockingbird Lane Boondocks, NJ 07666
If they live together they'd share an invite, just like you would do an unmarried couple living together..
This is exactly what I did.
GettinHutched
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
In my case, they share an invitation. Mr John Smith & Mr. Jack Smith.
SuzArtie69
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
If they live together then I would put both names on the invite.
If not then just the person that you know & Guest.
Marchbride07
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
I think you should address it as a couple, they are obviously out if they live together and are coming to the wedding as a couple! It's the 21st century! :)
Marly
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Posted by SoontobeMrsO
I would address them together.
Mr. John Smith Mr. Jack Brown 123 Main Street Any Where, State Zip
I agree!!!!!! This is what we are doing......
bettybcafe
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Re: RP: Gay Couple Invitation Addressing
Posted by MrsB2BE
Posted by SoontobeMrsO
I would address them together.
Mr. John Smith Mr. Jack Brown 123 Main Street Any Where, State Zip
