Sad today

So I have been a little upset since last night and I am not sure who I can talk to about this so I wanted to tell you girls. Maybe you can cheer me up.

Yesterday was my niece's first birthday. She is my goddaughter too. She is the most adorable, perfect kid. Never cries, always happy, and she's really beautiful. We had a great time at her party. And then I got home and got pretty upset because FH and I are planning to move to NH in 1.5 years - fall 2009. All of a sudden, the nagging feeling that I will miss my family and especially my sister and niece all came out, and I cried myself to sleep literally.

I really love it in NH and can't wait to start my family there with FH. It's a cheaper place to live, better quality of life as far as I am concerned (not as crowded, more beautiful landscape, etc) and we do love the snow, which we really don't get here anymore. I also know that once I have children of my own, I won't miss her as much because I'll have my own to dote on. But right now, the thought of not seeing her whenever I want, and the realization that everyone else in the family will be here for all those important milestones and I will not, is breaking my heart.



Someone, anyone, cheer me up please.

Honestly it is normal to feel that way!
You are growing and making a family of your own. Think of it this way though.. you are on the same coast... it is a drive but it is doable. Also you dont know what could happen in the next year.. cost could change and you could get some extra needed money to make you stay

It's ok to be upset about it. It just shows your much of a great person you are and how much you love this little girl.

Like you said, you will be starting a new life with FH and things will be so much better there. Think of all the good things that will happen for you.

And I'm sure you can go visit her and she and her parents can do the same.

It is bittersweet but cherish whatever memories you can with her now.

I kind of know how you feel. My sister and my nephews lived 5 mins from me.. I used to see them ALLL THE TIME.. now that are about 45 mins away.. Not as bad as NH but I did have the same feelings.

It just becomes a different 'way of life' kind of.

You'll come back for the important milestones..birthdays and holidays. Get a webcam!!!! It's not the same but at least you can see and talk to her and everybody!!!

Keep them in your heart and thoughts and call often..send pics.. have them send pics.. AND COME BACK TO VISIT!!!! Trains are a good thing!!!!

Good luck!!! and Remember you are moving to have a better life....it will all work out in the end.. you are her Aunt and no one can ever replace you in her heart!!!!!!

Jennifer, praying THE LORD will put HIS ARM around you especially at this moment, and comfort you. I will no doubt be in your position if Debi and Fred, and my other kids move as they all say they want to do. Mary MOB

I totally understand, but just think that you'll see them often and to fill the void when they are gone, you'll have your HUSBAND and YOUR FAMILY!!! it'll be hard at first, but I'm sure you'll be loving married life and trying for your own family!!!

everything will work out!

Thank you girls You made me cry a bit with your kind words, had to run into the bathroom so my boss did not see my red eyes. I went to bed sad, woke up sad, but I know I will see her. I hope to be able to see my family every month - if I can come down here every other month and they do the same on alternate months, that's every month. And even if it's only every other ... I know that's a lot for living 5 hours away. If I had to, I could drive down on a Fri night and drive back on Sun night. Totally doable, I know. Just the thought of leaving - actually saying goodbye - ugh, don't want to think about it.

But thank you all. I appreciate it and you have definitely helped.

It is a completely normal feeling and I will be honest it is going to be hard at first. It gets easier and then from time to you time it will get to you again. I know this from experience. And you will be surprised that you will be upset when you have to miss the bigger the things (bday parties, etc) but it was the littlest stuff that got to me the most -- like when my sister and neice would just stop by my moms or they would take her to the park or something so small that we do a million times.

Just keep this in mind, you are doing what is right for you, Fh and your future. Also you are a cars ride away. Imagine if you were in another country. It will all work out.

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Posted by anneandchris

It is a completely normal feeling and I will be honest it is going to be hard at first. It gets easier and then from time to you time it will get to you again. I know this from experience. And you will be surprised that you will be upset when you have to miss the bigger the things (bday parties, etc) but it was the littlest stuff that got to me the most -- like when my sister and neice would just stop by my moms or they would take her to the park or something so small that we do a million times.

Just keep this in mind, you are doing what is right for you, Fh and your future. Also you are a cars ride away. Imagine if you were in another country. It will all work out.

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I know, the little things are already starting to get to me. I go over there sometimes for dinner on a weeknight and just hang out with her. I will miss that.

And my friend's wife, who I have become very close with, moved here from Sweden about 1.5 years ago. She has two nephews there and one on the way. I can't imagine how she felt. I will have to talk to her about this!

Awww Jen

Dont worry. It will pass. Leaving family is tough...but you're moving on, and starting new. Family will ALWAYS be there - remember that. And you can always visit.

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Posted by beachbum05

Awww Jen

Dont worry. It will pass. Leaving family is tough...but you're moving on, and starting new. Family will ALWAYS be there - remember that. And you can always visit.

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Thanks, Bonnie.

I've been thinking about how much I will miss them for a while now - setting our wedding date back in Sept. kinda started it, because we always planned to move a year after the wedding, and all of a sudden we had a definite timeframe. But I kept pushing the feelings aside, not wanting to face them. I guess the big party and her first big milestone made me face it. But I am getting better now, not as sad as I was this morning or last night, thanks to all of you

Awww don't be sad. My Godson lives 2 1/2 hours away and I make it a point to keep in touch with him. I send him cards and call all the time. I also get to see him about once a month or so. We are incredibly close. It sux that I can't see him everyday, but it also makes it more special when I do.

NH isn't THAT far and you can make trips to see her. Plus once she's a little older she can come to you for the weekend. My godson is 6 and he LOVES sleeping at my house and we make fun day trips.

Don't worry, it will work out in the end

Im sorry! But NH isn't so far that you wouldnt be able to make it down for weekend trips and birthdays and holidays. I know that it must be hard thinking about the day to day without your family close by, but I am sure you can make it work.

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Posted by kristin597

Im sorry! But NH isn't so far that you wouldnt be able to make it down for weekend trips and birthdays and holidays. I know that it must be hard thinking about the day to day without your family close by, but I am sure you can make it work.

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Thanks Kristen

Thanks to you too Dee! I am glad I told you guys, I feel a lot better now.

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Posted by JBoothIn2008

Thank you girls You made me cry a bit with your kind words, had to run into the bathroom so my boss did not see my red eyes. I went to bed sad, woke up sad, but I know I will see her. I hope to be able to see my family every month - if I can come down here every other month and they do the same on alternate months, that's every month. And even if it's only every other ... I know that's a lot for living 5 hours away. If I had to, I could drive down on a Fri night and drive back on Sun night. Totally doable, I know. Just the thought of leaving - actually saying goodbye - ugh, don't want to think about it.

But thank you all. I appreciate it and you have definitely helped.

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I know what you mean...I used to get teary-eyed when it came time to leave them. But I dont anymore...it just becomes normal after awhile.

i felt the same exact feelings when I found out we had to stay in NJ. I am from LI and desperately wanted to stay there....it was even as deep as calling this whole wedding thing off.....He has family here, but I am just not that close to them, and I love love love my family and friends AND JOB....on long island. I can't compare it to NH because i still work on LI, but I just feel like i don't see them as much as I could if I lived there. You'll be so excited once you make the move and so focused on organizing, decorating, adjusting, that it will lessen the blow for a little while...then it will come back, and you'll adjust. It will be a wave of emotions for the first few months to a year....it will be worse on days that you and FH argue...but you WILL get through it. It's not SO far away that coming home is really $$$$$ or a lengthy travel, so i'm sure you can still come back every couple of months or so, right??

That is a totally normal feeling. My sister and her baby live in Cali. I just went to visit them last month and it was the HARDEST thing leaving them. Luckily they are moving back to NY...they will still be about 3 hrs away....but wknds. we will visit....as will you!
This is all normal and it will hit you harder some times than others