~~~ Saturday QOTD ~~~

I have recently been having a lot of anxiety about the wedding. Not about marrying FH but about living with him. Not even living with him, more living without him (he works in CT 4 days a week).

So...

Did you decide to live with FH before you were married? Why or why not? (Lets have no drama here, its everyone's own personal feeling, not an argument over who is right and wrong.)


Girls who don't live with FH:

Do you have any anxiety about moving in with FH after the wedding? Why?


Girls who do live with FH (or DH):

Did you have anxiety before moving in together? Was the adjustment hard? What was the hardest thing to adjust to?

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Posted by ttdiff11

i actually cried when i first moved out lol. i know it sounds crazy but i missed always seeing my fam and my dog!!! but i literally moved like 7 minutes away and i see them all the time anway lol. but im obv really glad i did and very happy!

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Same here!!! It was so hard to leave!!! For me, I had moved out on my own when I was 19 but I lived on the same block as my mom still (we lived in Manhattan and I lived on the same block my entire life.. Even my mom lived on the block her whole life!). So even though I was on my own, I was still close to my mom. When DH and I moved in together two years ago, we moved o the Bronx (where he is from) and while it is still close-ish, it is like living in a different world. It was so traumatizing to leave at first but now I am fine with it obviously.

Fh and I have been living together for a little over a year. We decided to move in together b/c although we paid rent on two apartments we usually spent most nights at my place. So shortly before we got engaged we decided to rent one really nice apartment. I was really excited- No stress other than the stress of packing...but that all change once we moved into the apartment. The first several months were VERY STRESSFUL!!!!!
We were constantly arguing about FH leaving his stuff every where. I unpacked most of the apartment myself b/c FH was really busy with work then he complained that he could not find any thing. It was a very difficult adjustment for both of us. It was not all bad but it did put some stress on our relationship. That being said I would do it all over again but I would clearly define my expectations sooner rather than later.

FH and I do not live together, because we both come from very strict families, we're not even 'allowed' to go away overnight together, and FH is pushing 30. We're also cheap, and freeloaders lol, so we would be pretty foolish to give up what we have going, which is rent-free, comfortable living. I think we're going to be in a really good financial place that a lot of people our ages are not in because of that, so I really don't have any issue with the fact that we don't already live together. For us, it was the most practical choice (and kept the peace).

That being said, I have a little anxiety about moving in with him, because he can be really annoying about his belongings. I'm hoping that once he has his own place, he will be better with keeping track of his things. He also has first born syndrome, where he chooses not to take care of himself, but rather waits to be taken care of. Case and point...the women went to a shower a few weeks ago, leaving the men alone on a Saturday afternoon. Usually on Saturday afternoon mommy gets lunch. As we were driving back, I commented that I bet FH didn't eat all day because no one was around to feed him, and that FBIL (younger) prepared himself a feast. Sure enough, we get back, and FH didn't eat all day 'because no one was around and there was nothing in the house'. FBIL make himself an omelet and a sandwich. FMIL always kind of taunts me that she's going to give me an instruction manual for FH, but really, she made him that way, so I'm a little anxious about having to teach an old dog new tricks, because I'm not going to stand for that lack of self-sufficiency BS.

We've been living toether for the past 2 years and at first it was hard. The living with him wasnt that hard, it was the moving out of my parents house that was hard. I cried everyday for like a week.

OK sorry I didn't answer it right away, we wanted to get some gardening done before the rain.


We are not living together yet. It was very important to both our parents and not worth the fight. I probably would have, had I not been able to live at home, but my parents are so great and its so easy to be at home.

I am having HUGE anxiety about moving out. I am super close to my parents. I love coming home or getting up in the morning and having my mom to talk to. I LOVE LOVE LOVE my house and my bedroom and the fact it won't be mine anymore is bothering me. I have moved out before. I lived in DC for three years, but it never felt permanent, like I couldn't come home if I wanted to.

My big anxiety is living alone when FH is in CT. I hate being alone. I lived alone in DC and I never really liked it, and that was a small alcove studio on the 12th floor, not a big house. I hate being here alone and I have lived here almost my whole life.

I tear up about it whenever we talk about it.

fh and i dont live together...we had planned on it 2 yrs ago but then my mom got sck and it just never happened..so now we have decided to just wat till we r marred

as for anety,i dont really have any caue we spend so much time together and sllep over each others house but im sure there will be some adjustments when we move in

We decided to move in together to get adjusted to be together of course for long periods of time besides a day or so. The toughest thing was to split my time between FH and my mom because i have to keep them both company and also the lack of room now with FH's stuff lol. But other than that it's fabulous to be living with FH

we started looking for a place about 6 months after we got engaged...
we were not exactly trying to move in before the wedding, just when we found a place..
we found a place in march, and getting married in august! (so we are living in sin for a few months! lol)

no anxiety really because i pretty much was living in his mom's house before we got our own place! lol

FH and I do live together now and I did not have any anxiety when we moved in together. We are pretty much compatible and work to balance one another out so it has worked out well

That does not mean that he does not tick me off by leaving his socks on the side of the bed, or emptying the garbage and not replacing the bag etc.... you truly have to have patience and not sweat the small things!

We don't live together. He 'officially' lives with his grandpa (who is 91) but he's here 90% of the time. No reason why we haven't moved in together except he thinks of my apt as 'mine' and we are trying to buy a house so it would be silly for him to move twice in a short period of time.

He's here for days a time so I don't think I have any anxiety about living with him. However, I do have anxiety about not living alone any more (does that make sense?) I have lived alone for over 15 years, it's hard to go back to living with someone 24 hours a day, 7 days a week......... I love my 'me time.'